Desperation
by hyacinth beaver
Summary: In the dictionary, DESPERATION is defined as recklessness due to despair. That's just how Hermione justifed her actions, they were all out of desperation. She had lost everything and she was willing to go back through time just to get it all back. THr!
1. Prologue: Some Other Beginning's End

A/N: Hello everybody! I am the tofuubeaver! To those of you who are reading my fic NEVER WOULD HAVE IMAGINED you must be thinking 'what the hell is that wacko doing writing this fic?'. Well the answer to that is simple: I have no idea whatsoever! I was writing chapter 11 of my other fic and suddenly had this idea for a THr fic. I couldn't let the idea pass me by so I started this. Don't worry! I will never abandon NEVER WOULD HAVE IMAGINED! It will continue and so will this! I will be writing them simultaneously! Wish me luck! Hope you like DESPERATION!

Disclaimer1: if I owned any of Harry Potter…I would be rich, british and middle aged. All of which, I am not! So just accept it coz I already have.

Disclaimer2: Chapter name is a line from Closing Time by Semisonic

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PROLOGUE: Every New Beginning Starts From Some Other Beginning's End **

Tears were streaming down Hermione's face as she ran towards the castle. She was crying uncontrollably and no one was there to wipe her tears.

_

* * *

It was the night of the final battle. Voldemort had finally broken the defenses at Hogwarts and launched a full scale attack. Death Eaters were swarming everywhere, throwing curses as they went. The Order wasn't prepared. The death of Dumbledore had been a fatal blow for the order. They weren't at all prepared when the Death Eaters barged in the doors._

_Neville was the first of her friends to die. He was trying to distract a Death Eater so that a first year could escape. _

"_RUN! GO!" the first year ran towards the others and Neville was left with the torturer of his parents._

"_I didn't know you were still alive boy?"_

"_EXPELLIARMUS!"_

"_PROTEGO! Did you really think that it would be that easy?" Bellatrix laughed. "It's going to be a real pleasure killing you. STUPEFY!"_

_Neville was hit and the pain came searing through his body and he fell on his back._

"_Did anybody tell you how your parents really went mad?" she amusingly asked and Neville gave no answer. "No…well I will just have to take you down memory lane. It was a dark night and I had just entered your house. Your idiot father was stupid enough to try and stop me so I cursed him…Would you like me to demonstrate… CRUCIO!"_

_Neville gave a shout at the immense pain he was feeling. It was like a thousand hot pokers being thrust onto his body and he began to cry._

"_Like father like son. Your father couldn't stand the pain either…the weakling. On to your mother, well she came like the stupid Gryffindor she was…and tried to stop me. Now that was useless. She met the same fate as your coward father. Yes COWARD! He begged me for his life like a whimpering dog!" she laughed sadistically and broke the curse from Neville._

"_LIAR!"_

"_Am I now? Pathetic boy! AVADA KEDAVRA!" at that instant, Hermione saw as a green beam of light hit her friend's chest. In just seconds, he dropped lifelessly to the floor and was gone._

"Oh Neville…" she said wiping away her tears. She was climbing the stairs. She had to get there. She just had to. She pushed her tears back and ran faster.

_

* * *

The next person she saw killed was Draco Malfoy. They weren't exactly friends, but they fought together since he refused to be a Death Eater. Draco wasn't the kind of person who liked the idea being someone's servant, for that she respected him. But now, he was fighting off two Death Eaters and was cornered. They were using the Cruciatus curse on him, but he didn't break. He had been used to the pain, thanks to his father. He was fighting the curse with all his might when suddenly another dark figure appeared. It was Lucius. He was holding his wand against his own son. _

"_Did you really think that you could get away unpunished Draco?"_

"_Hello father, come to do the dirty work yourself? That's new!" Draco was brave in the face of his father._

"_Now Draco, is that any way to talk to your father?" Lucius said, feigning hurt. "Well mingling with these weaklings has certainly changed you my boy."_

"_Shut up father!"_

"_Well well! I see you're still arrogant but stupid. What a pity. Such a disappointment. You could have been great son. You would have been in the ranks of the Dark Lord!"_

"_I said shut up father! I will never be like you! IMPEDIMENTA!"_

"_PROTEGO! Impertinent filth! You dare betray the Malfoy line? STUPEFY!"_

_Draco didn't move. He was absorbing the pain from the wand. Hermione could only think of how it might have felt to see your own father take vengeance on you. But just when Hermione thought that Lucius would stop, a spark of green erupted from his wand and Draco fell to the ground. Lucius had just killed his only son._

"_That was for your insolence boy." That was the last Hermione heard before she was shot with a stunner from behind._

"Oh my God Draco…" Her feet were getting tired. She felt like she couldn't run anymore, but she had to go on. They were taking the castle fast and she couldn't fight. The pain of what she had seen that night drained her of all natural strength. She was getting weaker with every step, but she had to go on.

_

* * *

The battle was getting harder and harder. There was so much death and pain. Suffering surrounded her and she couldn't help because she had been fighting her own opponent. But suddenly her attention was caught by a head of flaming red hair. _

"_Weasley…Potter's sidekick...the perpetual pain in my neck. It will really be a joy to watch you die." Their old Potion's master was indeed a Death Eater._

"_Shut up Snape! How could you? After Dumbledore trusted you so much? How could you betray him! How could you kill him!"_

_Snape only laughed. "You were always one for dramatics Weasley! SECTUMSEMPRA!"_

_A huge gash appeared on Ron's chest and it was bleeding profusely. "INCENDIO!"_

"_AQUATIVUS! Did you actually think that you could bring me down with that little spell? Weasley…I thought you had more brains than that! I guess I was wrong…at last something I'm happy to be wrong about!"_

"_STUPEFY!"_

"_PROTEGO! EXPELLIARMUS!"_

_Ron's wand came flying through the air. He was now defenseless against Snape._

"_I say…I believe you are about to die Weasley." Ron knew that as well. He wasn't afraid. He was ready to die._

"_You are an arsehole you slimey greasy git! Go to hell!"_

"_I'll meet you there…AVADA KEDAVRA!" Snape aimed his wand at Ron's heart. After he was satisfied, he walked away leaving a freckled boy on the ground._

_With that, Ron was gone. Hermione quickly left her opponent be and rushed to the side of her fallen friend. His once almost always red face was now pale. His face was now emotionless. His skin was so clammy. She couldn't believe it. Ron was dead. _

"No…No…Ron." She was now fiercely fighting back her tears. She couldn't believe that Ron had died. How could he have died like that? They were meant to be the Golden Trio. They were all supposed to survive the war together and graduate. They were supposed to buy a flat near Diagon Alley so that it would be easy for Ron and Harry to go to the ministry for their auror training and Hermione could just apparate to St. Mungo's. But now all those plans seemed like folly. It seemed so ridiculous now. She desperately tried running faster. She was now only one flight of stairs away from her goal.

_

* * *

Hermione headed to the edges of the Forbidden Forest. She had heard a Death Eater say that Harry and Voldemort were dueling there. She ran and ran until she saw the sparks from their wands. Harry was struggling to get up while Voldemort only advanced neared and nearer. _

"_Finally…just one spell and I will be rid of you once and for all. You have been a hard target boy, but now…I will finally kill you!"_

"_You wish!" Harry aimed his wand to him and muttered a spell that knocked the Dark Lord off his feet, giving Harry time to get up._

"_Do you really think that you can defeat me Potter?" he rose as if he was levitated up. "That scar of yours…" pointing to Harry's forehead, "is an anomaly. I assure you that the next time I hit you with the spell, you won't be so lucky."_

"_What makes you think that?" He said still pointing is wand at the snake like creature._

"_Because…I've brought insurance." And with one swift movement he waved his wand and a green light erupted from his wand. "AVADA KEDAVRA!"_

_Harry was hit, barely hit, but hit. He lay on the ground…still breathing._

"_Looks like you're wrong Voldie!" he could barely speak…he was gasping for air…but at least he was still alive._

"_Well not for long." With that Voldemort brought out a dagger and thrust it through Harry's heart. Blood drenched the Dark Lord's robes and a terrifying smile came across his face._

"HARRY!" but there was nothing she could do. Hermione could not bring back the dead. Harry was dead. Ron was dead. Draco was dead. Neville was dead. She had seen them die. She had seen the exact moments when their lives were taken from them.

Hermione she started pacing and allowed all her tears gushed out. All the pain and suffering she had seen and had felt came out in a river of salty tears. She was the only one left now. Nobody could help her. Nobody could wipe away her tears.

The thought of that made her fall to the ground. Her hot tears burned her cheeks. There was nothing she could do. There was nothing she could do to bring them back.

'We still have one hope.'

She got up and opened the door she was sitting in front of. She entered he dark, empty room only to find her trunk, a bag of galleons. She was so tired. She couldn't fight it anymore. She closed the door and locked it with all the sealing charms she knew.

'I'll bring you back! I'll bring you all back!' with that, she closed her eyes and lay beside her trunk.

* * *

She woke up not knowing whether it was night or day. She quickly changed into a new set of robes and took a deep breath. 

'I hope it worked.'

She took off all the sealing charms from the door and opened it.

She came out to see that it was morning. The birds were chirping and the leaves were golden brown. It was mildly cold and she became thankful that she had worn a thick cloak.

'Did it work?' she was so curious to know if her plan had worked. She left her stuff in the room and went up to a person in the nearby corridor.

She tapped the unknown person at the shoulder and asked…

"Do you happen to have a copy of today's Daily Prophet?"

"Yes." The girl took the newspaper from her bag and gave it to Hermione. She quickly scanned the page and came upon the images that made her heart soar!

1945

'Thank God it worked!' she had gone back to 1945…to where it all started, to where he all started.

"Do you know where Professor Dumbledore's office is?" she asked the same girl.

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A/N: I hope ya'll liked it! I wanted to right this fic so much. But don't worry the READER'S CHOICE FIC is still on. For those who are new…please go to my profile an pic from the fics labeled :FICS I PLAN ON WRITING and vote for the one you want to see. Submit it to me through Personal Messages, Reviews or Emails! 

Please review! Please! Coz if ya don't, this will be condemned to the ONESHOT fate and you will all be doomed to suffering from the abandonment of this fic. So please review coz I don't write unless I've gotten feedback.

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the tofuubeaver (rita…yup that's my name!)


	2. Enticingly Mysterious

**A/N: mind block is a very bad thing…I cant seem to think of anything to right in my other fic…my mind is a blank. Oh well…here it is the next chappie…hope you enjoy!**

**Disclimer1: Potter, Dumbledore, Riddle, Malfoy…all of them! They will all never be mine so deal with it!**

**Disclaimer2: I don't own oreos…I just eat them.**

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**Chapter 2: Enticingly Mysterious**

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'Here goes nothing…' 

Hermione was in front of Dumbledore's classroom. He was still the Transfigurations teacher at the time. She tapped the door lightly.

"Yes?" said a young Dumbledore.

"Professor Dumbledore?" His hair was a dark shade of auburn and his beard was definitely shorter. Hermione was in shock. Dumbledore was dead in her time, but here, he was still vibrant and full of life. The sight of this almost brought her to tears…almost. She couldn't afford to cry right now, besides…she had no more tears to shed.

"Yes my dear…is there something you need?"

"Professor…may I speak to you in private?" she couldn't afford to be overheard.

"Of course Miss…I'm sorry my dear but I don't know your name?"

"Sir…if we may first go to a private area before I reveal anything?"

"Of course…follow me please." Dumbledore stood up and lead her out of the classroom. They climbed a flight of stairs until they came upon a portrait a woman who appeared to be knitting socks.

'Trust Dumbledore to choose a portrait that features socks.'

"Oreo cookies"

'Trust Dumbledore to choose a password concerning a muggle confection.' If she wasn't so depressed at the moment, her thoughts might have even made her laugh. But this was not a time for laughter. She couldn't laugh knowing that her friends were gone.

'I will get you back…no matter what it takes.'

"If you'll just follow me." The old man's words drew her from her thoughts and into a quaint little office inside the portrait door. The room was filled with hundreds of little oddities and knick knacks. It was very cluttered and all, but somehow it seemed organized.

"Now if you'll take a seat, you may tell me your purpose dear child and how you came upon Hogwarts."

"Sir…would you be able to do anything to save a friend's life?" she was choosing her words wisely. Hermione didn't want to shock Dumbledore too much.

"Yes, but to be frank I don't know what that has to do with your identity." To Hermione, that was the Dumbledore way of saying that she was being evasive.

"Well sir…last night there was an attack on my school." The memories were too painful, but she had to go on if her plan was ever going to work. "I was there. I saw everything. Dark wizards were attacking and all we could do was fight." Her voice was cracking. Images of the Death Eaters came flying though her mind. "I had to fight. I had to fend them off. My friends…" tears were now falling down form her eyes. "…my friends had to fight with me. We were all only mere children but we had to fight." It was true. They were all children. They were supposed to have carefree lives, but the war had changed that. The war had changed them. "All my friends died that night sir. I was the only one that survived." She stopped. It was all too painful. She was now alone. She cried silently in her seat and wiped her tears away.

"I'm sorry my dear. That is something no person should have to go through…no matter what their age. I am sure that your friends all died noble deaths."

"Well sir, I was hoping to change that."

"What do you mean?" he wasn't certain of what she was talking about.

"Their deaths sir…I wish to change that."

"My dear girl, the dead will remain dead. Even magic can not bring the dead back. I'm so sorry my dear."

"That's just the thing sir, I can bring them back." Her voice flowed with determination.

"I don't believe I follow you." He was confused. Did this girl have the power to bring the dead back?

"Well sir…" she had to tell him sometime, it was inevitable. "I am from the future. I am from the year 1997. I entered the Room of Requirement asking for a way to bring them back, it brought me here."

"I see." That was all he could say.

"You don't believe me do you?"

"On the contrary, I do believe you. What puzzles me is why you chose to tell me?"

"Well sir, in the future…you are the person I look up to the most. You always knew how to go about things and you have the wisdom that no other can ever achieve." She hoped to God that it didn't sound like sucking up, because it was all true. Dumbledore was one of the greatest wizards she had ever known.

'Along with Harry.'

"Well I thank you for having so much trust in me. If you don't mind my asking, what part do I play in all of this?"

"Sir I have to be able to study at Hogwarts for my plan to work, but I don't have a letter and I don't have any transcripts."

"That, I maybe able to remedy."

"Thank you Professor." She got up and gave him a big hug. Her plan now had a chance of working.

"Your welcome Miss…oh dear…I still don't know your name."

"My name is----" just as she was about to reveal her identity, Dumbledore stopped her.

"On second thought, I don't think it may be wise for you to reveal your real identity to me, as a matter of fact, I don't believe you should tell me anything else of the future."

"You're right Professor. If you don't mind…could you pick a name for me?"

"Of course." He smiled. "Considering the eventsby which you came to be here, I believe that Nadya would be an appropriate name."

"Why is that Professor?" she was confused on why Dumbledore would pick that name out of so many.

"Because my dear…it means hope." It was then that Hermione saw the thing that she had missed most about her old headmaster. It was the twinkle in his eyes.

"Thank you sir."

"Now let's go to the Headmaster to get you enrolled shall we?" And with that they stepped out of the office and headed towards Armando Dippett's office.

* * *

"Come in." 

Hermione came with Professor Dumbledore to the current Headmaster's office. It looked practically the same as it did in her time, the only difference was that there were less knick knacks.

"Albus! What brings you here…who is this?" Obviously, Professor Dippett was a very straight to the point kind of man.

"Well Headmaster, this is Nadya Cavanaugh. Her parents were dear friends of mine, but unfortunately they were caught in crossfire between Grindewald's forces and some aurors. They died and she was the only survivor."

"I am very sorry to hear that Albus." Hermione nodded.

"Anyway, they left Nadya in my care and I was thinking if she may attend school here so that I may keep an eye on her." Dumbledore had planned it all too well.

"Of course Albus! What year is she?"

"Seventh sir." Hermione said quietly.

"And your former school?"

Hermione hadn't thought about this. She hadn't thought about her background that much. She was too wrapped up in getting there that she forgot to think of a story about where she came from. She had no idea what to say so she just blurted out the first thing that came to mind… "Durmstrang."

"Very well. I will have the head boy give you a tour after you are sorted at the feast."

"Thank you Headmaster." Hermione was not used to calling this man Headmaster.

"Will that be all Albus?" he asked, Dumbledore nodded. "Very well, now if you will excuse me…I have more pressing matters to attend to." He said quickly.

Dumbledore and Hermione showed themselves out of the office.

"I suppose that you don't have any school things?"

"Actually sir, the Room also provided me with a trunk of my things. I guess I should retrieve it then."

"Excellent. See you at the feast Ms. Cavanaugh. I trust you know your way to the Great Hall."

"Yes Professor." Of course she knew her way to the Great Hall.

"Well, till dinner then." He bid farewell and walked away.

"Oh Professor…" he turned back at her words. "Thank you sir…for everything."

"You needn't mention it."

* * *

"Attention everyone! I have an announcement to make." The buzzing in the Great Hall stopped and all heads were faced towards the Headmaster. "Thank you. Now, this year we have a new student with us. She has transferred all the way from Durmstrang and has come to Hogwarts to study during her final year. Please welcome Ms. Nadya Cavanaugh." 

Hermione entered the Great Hall and all eyes were on her. They were all curious about this new girl. She didn't mind them. She just looked head on and went straight to the stool in front of the High table.

She was met by Professor Dumbledore and a dodgy, dusty, dirty old hat was placed on her head.

'Well then, Ms. Cavanaugh…or should I say Ms. Granger' Hermione winced at the hat's declaration. 'Oh yes! I know who you are…you are on a mission I see…to bring back your friends. Hmmmm…how loyal you are…and yet you don't fit Hufflepuff. What you did was also very smart…but still, you weren't made to be a Ravenclaw. You were brave…and very cunning. Yes, you are very cunning indeed. You have what it takes to be in…'

"SLYTHERIN!" the hat shouted. The students from Slytherin applauded while the other three houses shot her glares. Certainly, this was house prejudice at its best. She got up from her chair and headed for her new house.

She couldn't believe what had just happened! She was in Slytherin? SLYTHERIN! How could she hae ended up there! She was a Gryffindor! She didn't belong with the slimey snakes of Slytherin. Slytherins had been her enemies for the past six years! There was no way that she was one now! But being the logical person that she was, she decided to just accept her fate...no amount of whining could help her now...besides, being in Slytherin would help in her plan.

"Welcome to Slytherin house Cavanaugh. I'm Abraxas Malfoy, pleasure to meet you." He extended his hand and she acknowledged the gesture,

"Likewise I'm sure." Years of being around Draco had finally paid off.

'_Granger, Slytherins say as little as possible and should be as cold as can be. We command respect and look down to no one. We show no signs of weakness because it is the only way to survive.'_

'Thank you Draco.'

"Now, I take it that you know a little Dark Magic since you went to Durmstrang."

"A little." She responded, not looking at him and focusing her attention to her meal.

"Interesting." After that, Malfoy shut up. He didn't say anything more to her and just let her get back to her meal.

Finally when she had finished, she stood up and walked towards the big oak doors.

"Where do you think your going?" said a voice from behind her. She turned around to see a dark haired boy with eyes almost as dark as midnight.

"I said where do you think you are going?" the boy walked towards her. He was tall for his age, certainly more than a head taller than her. His hair was slightly wavy and yet had elegance to it. This boy was pale, paler than Draco she might even say. But the most striking feature of this person was his eyes. They were cold and dark. His eyes held no expression of sadness or joy, they were utterly blank.

"Where does it look like I'm going?" she needed to be as cold as possible if she was ever going to survive Slytherin house.

The boy was taken a back by her blatant rudeness. Apparently, it didn't happen to him very often. "Look here Cavanaugh, I'm going to let that slide because you're new…but do that again and you will be sorry."

"Was that a threat? Who are you anyway?" she spat. The nerve of this boy, threatening her as if she would follow him without question.

"I'm the Head Boy. Tom Riddle." He said knowingly and highly.

"I see." So this was Tom Riddle. This was Harry's murderer and the man responsible for the deaths of all her friends. This was the man…no the monster who took away their childhood and had them living in constant fear. It took all the strength she had to stop herself from hexing him to oblivion. She couldn't kill him now, it would be too suspicious. She had to act as if this was the first time she had ever seen him. It was the hardest thing she ever had to do.

"Now, the Headmaster told me to show you around and I have no intentions of disobeying his orders."

"Of course you wouldn't." she said nonchalantly.

"I promise you that I don't do this for the shear pleasantries of your company." He warned.

'He isn't charming at all!' she thought, for many accounts have declared that Voldemort was quite the charmer in his younger years. Obviously, they were wrong.

"I assure you that I feel the same way."

"I'm glad we are clear on that. Now if you will follow me, I will show you around the castle." He didn't even extend his arm to her. He just walked past her and expected her to follow, as she did.

They went through winding staircases and dark corridors. He showed her all the classrooms and directed her to the library. This was all too boring for Hermione since she already knew where everything was, but the fact that Tom did this all with an air of boredom made the night draw longer for her. Finally they came upon a portrait which showed Salazar Slytherin himself.

"This is where I leave you." He coldly said to her. "This is the entrance to the Slytherin dormitories. I hope that you maybe able to find it on your own in the following days because I loathe repeating myself and I refuse to show you again."

"I'm sure I can manage." With that he stepped away from her and headed for the staircase. 'Does he think that I have the mind of an armadillo!' just as she was about to say the password, she remembered something…

"Oh Riddle…" she shouted, that almost made him miss a step.

"What!" he looked quite irritated, that made her smirk…a smirk that almost rivaled Draco's.

"The password Riddle?" she said somewhat teasingly.

Tom went a few steps closer to her. He closed the gap between them and a shiver ran down her spine because of his close proximity to her. He leaned down and whispered in her ear. "It's Darkness." With that he stepped away and walked in the direction from whence he came.

'This is going to be interesting.'

"Darkness…" she muttered, the portrait door swung open and she entered the snake's lair.

* * *

"You're the new girl aren't you?" a girl with raven black hair approached her. 

It was the day after the sorting, and a Saturday too. Hermione had nothing to do that day. She had no classes and it was too early for the library to be open so she just sat in the Slytherin common room.

She sat in front of the fire place and stared at the embers. The flame's eloquent dance caught her attention and she was completely enthralled. This was the sort of thing she used to do with Harry.

'Harry…'

"Hello?" the girl called again, this time drawing her attention.

"Yes?" she asked, not looking at the person, she acknowledged her presence but never reverted her gaze from the fire.

"You're the new girl aren't you? What's your name again…Nadine…Nelly…" the girl repeated herself.

"Nadya and yes."

"Well then, allow us to introduce ourselves…" Hermione turned around to see a bunch of girls standing behind her.

"I am Katherine Levin. This is Melissa Boyd…" she pointed to a skinny blonde that had too much make up for her own good. "…and this is Victoria Stanford." This time she signaled to a girl who had unusually tight robes. "We figured that if you're going to be in Slytherin, then you better hang out with the right people."

"And that would be you?" she said somewhat sarcastically.

"But of course." Katherine said with a sense of supremacy about her. Evidently, this girl was not keen on picking up sarcasm.

"Well…" she started. "However tempting your offer is…" The trio of girls beamed at this. "I believe I will have to decline your offer."

"What!" they all said in unison, all with an expression of shock in their faces. Their exclamation also attracted the attention of the whole common room.

"I understand that you are slow at this so I'll say it one more time. I decline your offer."

"I don't think you understand, we are the right kind of people. A lot of girls would kill for the opportunity we've given you."

"How thick are you? I don't think YOU understand. I don't want to hang out with you, and I believe I can make out the RIGHT sort of people for myself thank you." She was trying to say it as coldly as possible. She hid her anger and only let out an icy exterior.

"You will be sorry…" Katherine turned her back on Hermione and the other two followed suit.

"That was interesting." Said a voice from the shadows.

"I'm glad I could entertain."

The figure came out and it was no other than Abraxas Malfoy. He looked terribly like his son, Lucius. They both had the same long blond hair and same icy grey eyes.

"You are a very interesting girl Nadya."

"Thank you. I didn't know we were on first name basis…perhaps it's just me." She really didn't want to see him right now.

"Feisty one aren't you?" he walked closer to her, a propinquity that to her was not one which she was comfortable with. Catching a glance at the clock, she realized that the library was probably open by now.

"If you'll excuse me _Malfoy_, I have to be going now." She stood up and grabbed her bag. She headed for the portrait but Malfoy was blocking the way. "Do you mind?"

"Not at all. See you later _Nadya_." She walked away from him, not noticing the smirk on his face.

* * *

The smell of musty old books filled the air. It was a smell all too familiar with her. She had always loved the library. It brought a sense of comfort to her, a comfort that made her forget about the two strange encounters she had that morning. 

She walked to her table and sat down. She brought out one of her books and started reading. She was reading a book about the healing properties of bezoar. It reminded her of Neville.

'Oh Neville…' a singular tear dropped form her eyes. And it was followed by another, and another. She remembered everything about Neville. How kind he was, how he was always soft spoken…how nobly he died.

'It won't be like that for long. I'm going to bring you all back.'

"Herbology making you cry Cavanaugh?" a voice came from in front of her. She wiped the tears from her eyes and looked up to see that it was none other than Tom Riddle.

"Are you always this inquisitive or do I bring it out of you? What are you doing here Riddle?"

"Look who's inquisitive now?" he smirked. "If you must know, I was reading quite peacefully when I saw you come in. I was curious to see why you would come to the library at this hour and so I came here for an answer."

"Curiosity killed the cat Riddle."

"Yes…but satisfaction brought it back."

"Aren't you the little poet?" She hated this. She hated talking to Riddle, to Voldemort. She hated the fact that the monster was standing not two feet from her, yet she couldn't hurt him…not yet. She needed to keep him close. She needed to keep an eye on him. Ron's words entered her mind.

'_Keep your friend's close, but keep your enemies closer…no one ever beat anyone across the chess board if he didn't study the other's moves.'_

'Thank you Ron.'

"Well Cavanaugh, care to enlighten me?"

"No." with that she stood up, grabbed her bag and walked away from him. She needed him to be curious about her if her plan was ever going to work.

Meanwhile the boy she left in the library had a lot on his mind.

'There is something about that girl that just…entices me. What is it about her?'

* * *

**A/N: Ah that was crappy! Ahhhhhhhhhh! I can't think! This is hard! My mind id a blank! As usual, I will not right the following chapter if reviews don't come! I refuse! Oh wait! Before I forget! REVIEW!**

**I you like this sorry excuse for a chapter!**

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**the tofuubeaver**


	3. Definitely Unique

**A/N: Hey guys! EARLY UPDATE! I finished it earlier than expected! I'm sooooo glad that you reviewed. It just makes me so happy! AHHHHHHHHHH! At the rate you guys are going, I think the reviews for DESPERATION might even turn out better than NEVER WOULD HAVE IMAGINED! Oh My God! I hope that happens! My goal for this fic is 100 reviews! Hope I make quota…it'll be ok if I don't though, I write for fun not for reviews…but that doesn't mean I don't want reviews. Believe me…I want them.**

**Wait I'm babbling. Thanks to MadnessLover, LaNi-GoLDfish, redroseeternity and Lady Evanesence! A loud welcome back to aznchic2009 and Angelic Bladez. Nice of you guyz to drop in! All of you get OREOS! Oh and thanks to all that put me or my story in their alert or favorites! Seeing the numbers rise just makes my heartbeat race! **

**Well, there's no use keeping you from reading the new chapter! Here it goes.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything! Please don't sue me coz I'm dead broke!**

**

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Chapter 3: Definitely Unique **

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"Welcome all to another year at Hogwarts." Said a very droning voice. 

This was Hermione's first class of the day. She was sitting in the back of the classroom in the corner by the window. She sat alone; she didn't want to be disturbed.

"For the benefit of those who don't already know me….I am your Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Professor Merrythought." On the contrary, this professor was anything but merry. He was worse than Snape! He wore all black robes and had surprisingly long black hair pulled back to a pony tail. His voice was a thing that would have inspired fear in every student's heart.

"Now, as you are all aware, we have a new student with us…a Ms. Nadya Cavanaugh." When Hermione heard this, she snapped her head in shock. All the students were now looking at her. She wasn't expecting to be called that class, let alone be introduced. "Ms. Cavanaugh, will you please come here?"

She stood up from her remote seat and walked to the teacher's desk.

"Now Ms. Cavanaugh…I want to know what I'm dealing with so if you please be able to show us your abilities?" Professor Merrythought said this with no excitement whatsoever.

"Of course sir." He said almost inaudibly.

"Good. Riddle, if you please." He signaled for Tom to stand up. "You will be dueling with Ms. Cavanaugh so we can gauge her abilities…if ever there are any to be seen."

"Certainly sir." He walked up to the front of the class and held out his wand.

The two duelers met at the middle and greeted the other. "Don't expect me to go easy on you Cavanaugh." Tom whispered to her.

"I wouldn't dream of it Riddle." They turned back to back and stepped ten paces away from each other.

'I am going to be dueling with the Dark Lord! Oh. My. God! Well…he's not the Dark Lord yet, but still!' she said to her self.

'That girl doesn't know who she's dealing with.' Tom mused.

"STUPEFY!" Tom was the first to attack and he wasted no time in doing so. He didn't expect her to be ready…but she was.

"PROTEGO!" All the years of fighting against Death Eaters had toned her for dueling. This was a walk in the park for her. She didn't expect Tom to use the most common attack…somehow, she expected more from him. But she didn't know that he was only getting started.

"EVERTE SATUM!" a silvery light came from Tom's wand and it was meant to cause Hermione to topple over.

She quickly averted it and shot a spell of her own. "LACARNUM INFLAMARI!" a blazing fire blast from her wand and singed a part of Tom's robes.

"FLIPENDO!"

"ACENDIO!" Hermione cast a spell and she shot to the air, barely missing the curse. 'That was too close.'

'Damn that girl!' Tom was getting irritated. " ARRESTO MOMENTUM!" He was getting impatient, this girl was good…too good.

"PROTEGO!" Tom was good. He did all the right spells, had excellent form and had impeccable technique, but talented as he may be, she thought, he was no Harry.

Finally, he had had enough of the light spells. It was time to take it more seriously, he couldn't afford to lose to this girl. "DOLIUM EXCRUCIO!"

Pain shot through Hermione's body. Luckily for her, it was only like a milder version of the Cruciatus, so she could deal with the pain. She stood her ground and finally released a spell. "LACRIMOSUS!"

Tom felt all his painful memories flood in his mind. The moments of grief, sadness, pain…they all came back to him, but he couldn't break down, he couldn't let her win. He broke the effects of the curse. For him hate was always more powerful than sorrow. "CRUENTUS!"

Hermione jumped when she heard the spell. It was meant to stab her with an invisible knife; lucky for her…she was agile enough to evade it. Anger welled up on her. He had just used a very seriously dangerous spell on her. She was going to return the favor. "ABSIDIO!" A part of Tom's robes were slashed, it only scarcely reached his skin. He was just about to retort when…

"Enough!" Professor Merrythought finally intervened. "I think we have seen enough from the both of you." He looked at a calm Hermione and a sort of grin was formed on his face. "Well Ms. Cavanaugh, it seems like I have underestimated you. I should have known that a product of Durmstrang would be proficient in Defense Against The Dark Arts. Twenty points to Slytherin for the both of you!"

Hermione was ecstatic! She had just had an unparalleled duel with one of the best, and she almost won! But, she couldn't show it. She told herself that she has to look like she expected to win. Hermione only responded with a nod and went back to her seat.

"Well well Mr. Riddle, it seems like you have found your match."

'So it seems.' He thought as he went back to his chair. Upon seating, he glanced at her direction. 'So it seems.'

* * *

"Tom!" a voice called out his name as he was walking to the library. He didn't want to be disturbed. "Tom!" 

"What?" he said irritated. He turned around to see that it was none other than Abraxas Malfoy. "What do you want?"

"I heard the new girl smoked you in DADA this morning."

"She did nothing of the sort. I would have beaten her if Merrythought hadn't interrupted."

"Of course, but you must admit…she is good." Malfoy smirked.

"Yes, I do have to admit that."

"So what do you think about her?"

"She seems interesting enough…"

"She's also pretty, yet another thing you cannot deny."

"Yes, but there are a lot of pretty girls in Hogwarts, and most of them are following me." He signaled to the corner where they both saw a girl tailing him. They turned around again and Tom rolled his eyes in irritation.

"Yeah, except for one." With that Malfoy bid goodbye and walked away.

He was right. Many girls fawned over him…all but one.

'She is definitely interesting.' He entered the library and started to walk to his favorite table, it was the secluded one behind the DADA shelves. He wasn't expecting anyone to be there…especially her.

"What are you doing here?" He found _Nadya _sitting at his favorite table. She was reading her book so intently that she didn't even notice him approach.

"What does it look like? Really Riddle, I thought you had more intelligence than that." She didn't even look at him. This bothered Tom…it bothered him very much.

"Listen Cavanaugh…I don't think you understand how this works. This is my table. Nobody else sits here but me. You should really learn the rules."

She tore her gaze from her book and her hazel eyes met his onyx ones. She stood up and walked to him. This time she was the one that whispered in his ear. "Rules were made to be broken Riddle." With that she once again walked away…leaving a very confused Tom.

'What is it with that girl?' She confused him so. She was so different. She was the only person that didn't fear him. He had no control over her. She always somehow managed to shift the dominance to her side. He didn't like that, not at all. He sat there for a while, dwelling in his thoughts, when he realized why she left. It was almost time for Potions. Tom Riddle was never late for a class. He stood up and decided that he would push back thoughts of her.

* * *

"Well class…how delightful to see you all! As you know, I am Professor Slughorn and it is my pleasure to introduce you to the NEWT Level Potions." It was the last class of the day and most of the students were eager for the day to finish, but they weren't dreading the class. Slughorn had a reputation of being cheerful, so no student could complain. 

Hermione once again took a seat in the dark corner at the end of the classroom. She was glad Slughorn didn't make a spectacle out of her. He was just discussing a potion they were about to make. It was a very complex potion, a potion which she had already made.

"Now can any of you tell me what this is?" He held out a bottle of silvery white liquid. It was a very beautiful sight to behold. It was as if the night's stars were plucked from the heavens and concentrated in a vile of the potion. "Anyone? Ah! Yes Tom my boy, can you tell us?"

The whole room turned towards the dark- haired boy, eager for his response.

"It's called the Draught of Asper Mors Mortis"

"Excellent! Ten Points to Slytherin! Now can anybody tell me why it is called so?" Tom was the only one that raised his hand. "Now now Tom, let's give the others a chance." Slughorn scanned the room until… "Ah! Ms. Cavanaugh, care to give it a try?"

Hermione's head snapped when she heard her name. She was ecstatic when she realized that she knew the answer, but she could not let that show. She had to answer as nonchalantly as possible. "It's called the Draught of Asper Mors Mortis because it literally means 'Draught of Harsh Death'. The potion is made entirely of flower parts and essences, but it is one of the most deadly poisons created. It is a potion that instantly dehydrates all the liquid portions of the body until all that is left is the dust in the victim's bones."

"Outstanding Ms. Cavanaugh! It seems like you know your potions! Ten Points to Slytherin." The Professor was beaming at the unmatched performance of both his students. "As Ms. Cavanaugh said, this potion is very dangerous, but also very helpful. If you please Ms. Cavanaugh, what would happen if I add the extract of the amaryllis flower to this potion?"

Hermione once again knew the answer. "If you add the three drops of the extract, you will be able to get a very powerful healing potion, but add more than three drops and you'll get a very unstable substance that secretes a horribly foul stench."

"Wonderful! Ten more points to Slytherin!" the man couldn't be happier. "Now if you'll turn your attentions to the board…" he waved his wand, and writings appeared on the board. "…you will all attempt to make the healing potion derived from Asper Mors Mortis. Remember to be careful when adding the drops, we don't want it to smell like a dungbomb was released now do we." He gave a small chuckle.

After a few moments, he realized that not one student moved from their seat.

"Oh dear me! I seemed to have neglected to give you your pair assignments. My mistake. I guess senescence does come with age." He mused at himself. He waved his wand again and a hat came out. "Here we go. This hat is filled with all the names of the girls in this class. Now each of you gentlemen will have to step up here and pick a name from the hat. The name which you pull out will be your permanent partner for the duration of the term."

To set an example, Tom stood up and went to the hat first…after all, he was Head Boy. "Very good Tom, now pick a name out of the hat."

Tom put his hand in the hat and pulled out the first parchment he laid his fingers on.

Nadya Cavanaugh

'Just my luck.' He wasn't expecting that at all (A/N: although, I know all of you did!). He took a deep breath and walked up to her solitary spot. She was deep in thought. It was like she was in another place. It was then that he saw something he had never seen before in her face. She let out a smile, it was barely noticeable…but still a smile. 'I wonder what she's smiling about?' He quickly dismissed his thoughts and reluctantly pulled her from her musings. "Cavanaugh."

"Yes?" She turned her head to his direction. Tom was disappointed to see that the smile had disappeared. 'Why do I even care?' He abruptly dismissed his earlier thoughts and gave her the paper with her name on it.

"Just my luck." She said dryly. Other girls would have shrieked in excitement to be his partner…this girl didn't.

"My words exactly. Look, just sit back Cavanaugh, I wouldn't want you to ruin the potion." He said as he was preparing the necessary ingredients.

"Whatever Riddle." She sat at the stool beside the cauldron and watched him work. He didn't know why, but he felt unnerved by this. He wasn't like this when others watched him, but she was different. 'Frustrating girl!'

He added the final ingredients and allowed the potion to simmer. It took a while but it finally changed color…just not the color he expected. It was supposed to turn silver, but instead it turned a deep shade of purple.

"What the hell is the matter with this?" He checked the instructions again. He had followed it to perfection! HE couldn't understand why the potion had not turned out right.

"You put too much rose thorns." She muttered.

"What!" 'I most certainly did not!'

"You put too much rose thorns." She got up and made for the table. She took a few lavender leaves and chopped them up.

"Wait…the instructions don't say anything about lavender leaves." He pointed out. She still continued chopping and was about to dump them in the cauldron. "No! You'll ruin it!"

"Like it isn't ruined right now?" she put the leaves in and at an instant, the potion changed from purple to a very metallic silver.

"What? How did that happen?" He was dumbfounded. What had just happened?

"You put too much rose thorns."

"You've already told me that!" his voice betrayed a little hint of anger…just a little.

"Well, the lavender neutralizes the thorns. And you're first in potions?"

How could he have forgotten that! Lavender leaves neutralize rose thorns! That was so simple. Why didn't he think of that? It was a good thing that no one was watching, or else his reputation might have been ruined.

"Just add the amaryllis extract…assuming that you have enough brain cells to count. Remember Riddle, three is what comes after two.

"Very witty Cavanaugh. Care to share anymore delightful quips?" no one would be dumb enough to mistake that for a real invitation.

"I have oh so many more Riddle, but i doubt that you would have enough brain cells to process them all."

He had had enough of this girl. She was too…too… it was just so bad that he couldn't find a word for it! He added the three drops of extract, waited for the draught to change color and put a sample in a vile.

"Here you go sir."

"Excellent Mr. Riddle, as always." He gave his prized pupil a winning smile. "And you Ms. Cavanaugh, what an unexpected delight! Truly you must have made your former potions master very proud."

Tom noticed that she winced at the declaration. He saw her give just simple nod and start to head out of the classroom.

* * *

"Excuse me." Hermione was absentmindedly walking to the library when she collided with someone. "I'm so sor---you." It was none other than Katherine Levin and her mindless duo. 

"Yes…us." She said smugly. The senseless three were blocking Hermione's way to the library.

"Do you mind, in case you didn't notice, I was going to the library and you are kind of blocking the way?"

"I heard that Tom Riddle is your Potion's partner." Said Victoria.

"Yeah… and so… what is the big deal?"

"You may not know, but Tom is mine, so hands off." This Katherine person was really getting on her nerves.

"Look, I don't care if you've written your name all over him, he's yours."

"Oh don't be so naïve…we know you like him…I mean who wouldn't?" replied Melissa.

"Ha! You must be joking! You and me…we are totally different so why would you even think for one minute that we have the same taste in guys?" Hermione said somewhat irritated.

"Whatever new girl, but remember one finger----"she interrupted Katherine now. Her possessive act was getting old.

"Yeah yeah…you'll bite my head off. I get it. Now if you'll please excuse me?" She pushed them to one side and made her way inside the library.

Little did she know that a pair of onyx eyes had seen the whole thing.

'Definitely unique. I'll have to change that.'

**_

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_ **

TEASERS:

_**An invitation. An unexpected guest. A spider up someone's arse. A little game of chess. A memory.**_

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A/N: Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha! I love all you guys! You're all so…cute! Well that was the chappie! Hope ya'll liked it! **

**Oh…you know what…I forgot to initiate ya'll to the official norms of the tofuubeaver. Almost all of my old readers know that I almost always have little questions in the end of my chapters. Its when you guys tell me what you think is the answer and in the end..the one who gets it right gets oreo points! (I modified a bit!)**

**QUESTIONS: **

**_who gets the spider up their arse?_**

**_Who plays chess, and who do you think wins? _**

**_What is this so called invitation for?_**

**Hmmmmm…toughies….well I'm sure you guys can figure it all out! Bwahahahahaha!**

**Please answer the questions by sending them through reviews or private messages!**

**Hope you guys liked the chapter!**

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**The Tofuubeaver**


	4. A Troubled Heart

**A/N: Update! Finally! I'm so sorry for the late update! I've been so busy with tests that i've barely had the time! I'm also sorry for not being able to respond to all your reviews! AHHHHHHHHHHHH! I hate work! I hate evil professors that dump you with work! AHHHHHHH!**

**I'm sure ya'll don't want to hear me ramble so here it goes. I'm sorry I didn't get to reply to your reviews. The busy little beaver has been making a whole lot of dams this week.**

**Oreos to kichou, nehimasgift, xxxCheezItxxx, Anuksunamun-Kalia, Lady Evanesence, redroseternity, Angelic Bladez, san01, LaNi- GoLDfish, MadnessLover, aznchic2009 and Silver Tears 11! Love ya'll for reviewing! Ya'll made my day!**

**Disclaimer1: don't own it…get over it!**

**Disclaimer2: I am not the first one to think of the THr ship so please don't think that I am…I am flattered though. If ya'll wanna read more THr I suggest Take My Heart Away by Hatusu, Have You Ever by Lady Moonglow and Riddle's Phantom by Anuksunamun-Kalia. They are the fics that inspired me to write mine! They are really good! They can be found in my favorites!**

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Chapter 4: A Troubled Heart **

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"_Do you really think that you can defeat me Potter?" he rose as if he was levitated up. "That scar of yours…" pointing to Harry's forehead, "is an anomaly. I assure you that the next time I hit you with the spell, you won't be so lucky."_

"_What makes you think that?" He said still pointing is wand at the snake like creature._

"_Because…I've brought insurance." And with one swift movement he waved his wand and a green light erupted from his wand. "AVADA KEDAVRA!"_

_Harry was hit, barely hit, but hit. He lay on the ground…still breathing._

"_Looks like you're wrong Voldie!" he could barely speak…he was gasping for air…but at least he was still alive._

"_Well not for long." With that Voldemort brought out a dagger and thrust it through Harry's heart. Blood drenched the Dark Lord's robes and a terrifying smile came across his face._

"HARRY!"

Hermione shot up from her bed. A cold sweat was all over her body and hot tears ran across her face. It had all been too real. She could almost smell the death in the air.

This wasn't the first time that this happened. As a matter of fact, it happened quite regularly. It would start of as a pleasant dream. It would sometimes start of with a happy memory. But somehow it always ended the same way… everything would fade until only Harry was left. She would call out his name, but he wouldn't hear her. Then, suddenly Voldemort would come, and their last battle would replay itself. She would try her best to help, but she never could. She was utterly helpless. Hermione would force herself to wake up, but she couldn't. She would only wake up when the dagger had been pierced through Harry's heart.

Tears were coming down from her eyes again. The memories were too much. She couldn't bear to think that Harry and the others were dead. But that was her reason for coming back. She would change the events of that night. She would bring them back.

She got up from her bed and to her trunk. She knelt down beside it, and opened it. She rummaged through her things till she found what she was looking for. Hermione took out a small mahogany box. It was eloquently filled with carvings of lilacs, her favorite flowers. Inside that box was Hermione's most treasured possession.

"_Hermione, I have something for you." Harry brought out a small mahogany box and gave it to her._

"_What is it Harry?" she examined the small wooden box. It had lilacs carved all over it. Lilacs were her favorite flowers and seeing that Harry remembered only made her smile._

"_Well…you're going to have to open it to find out now don't you?" he said with a little nervous chuckle. He had been acting all nervous all day. _

_Hermione took the bow off and opened the box. "Harry…I don't know what to say…" She was now in the verge of tears. Before she could say anything, Harry began to speak._

"_I've always closed my heart to everyone…Cho…Ginny…everyone. You were the only one I opened up to. I always felt like I could tell you anything and everything. You were the only one that could understand me. You opened my heart Hermione. Now I'm ready to give it to you."_

_Inside the box was a small golden heart. It was Harry's heart. Glistening tears were now flowing from her hazel eyes. She had loved Harry for a long time, but complications stood in the way and they were too numerous to count, besides, he had been with far better girls than her. How could she ever compare to Ginny or Cho. She thought that she would always be a chum to him. She thought that he would only see her as a friend...she now found out that she was wrong all along._

"_I love you Hermione Granger." He did love her. His emerald eyes said it all. He had fallen in love with her. For so long, he had only seen her as a supportive friend, but something changed that. He was even jealous of Viktor in the Yule Ball, but he wasn't going to go ballistic like Ron. No…he wanted her to be happy, and if Viktor did that, then so be it. He tried to love Cho. He tried to love Ginny. But they just weren't Hermione. Only Hermione could make him happy._

_They were staring in to each other's eyes. The silence was deafening. Both hopelessly wished that the other would speak, but neither knew what to say._

_What was she going to say? She had secretly been waiting for this moment for so long, but no words came. She was utterly speechless. That had never happened to her…ever. Finally, after a lot of thought, Hermione found the perfect words. She looked straight into his eyes and spoke._

"_I love you too Harry." Those words were perfect. He had never felt so happy. They were simple words, but they meant the world to him._

Harry's heart.

It was still as beautiful as it was the day Harry gave it to her. It never lost its glimmer or its shine. She fingered it lovingly as tears came from her eyes. She missed him so much. She missed the way that he would always bite half of an every flavor bean before he gave the other half to her…he never let Hermione get the foul ones. She missed the fact that he would always by her a book from every Hogsmead visit. She missed the way that he would lovingly watch her as she danced in the rain. She missed the way he would wipe away her tears whenever he saw her cry. He wasn't there to wipe her tears anymore. Without Harry, she felt utterly alone.

'Harry.'

She put the heart back in its box and wiped the tears from her face. She needed to be strong if she ever wanted him back.

Hermione once again found herself sitting in front of the fire. She was staring into the flame with such attention, more attention than she ever paid in class. This was something she used to do with Harry. They would just sit together and stare at the flames. Hermione missed it. But, once again, her concentration was broken by an abrupt sound in the background.

* * *

"How do you do it Tom?" 

She turned around to see a bunch of Slytherins huddled together watching what seemed to be a chess game.

As usual, a group of girls were fawning over Tom while he idly ignored them. It appears that he had just beaten another challenger in a game of chess.

"Nadya." A voice came from the crowd. It belonged to Malfoy.

'Annoying insufferable prat of a ferret senior.' "What?" she tried to say this without sounding too irritated.

"I take it you know how to play wizard's chess?"

"Yeah, and so?"

"Well now! You can play Tom here…but I must warn you he's never lost game. Up for the challenge?"

"Why not. I don't have anything better to do." She stood up from her comfortable chair near the fire and sat to one opposite Tom. "How about you Riddle? Are you up for the challenge?" she said as she arranged the chess pieces.

"You have no idea." He smirked. Tom was pretty confident. Chess was his forte. He had never lost a match…ever.

"Then let the games begin." pronounced Malfoy.

"Knight to E4." Tom was the first to move. The game had started.

* * *

It had been hours since that first move. Tom and Hermione's game was really a feast for the eyes. Their brains ran like clockwork, always planning one step against their opponent. The stalls between moves were like forever to the spectators. Both of the players would just stop and look at the pieces for what seemed like hours, when a move was finally made, the other would take a turn at the deep seeded concentration. 

It was now down to the last pieces. Tom's queen threatened Hermione's knight, but Hermione's bishop threatened his queen. It was all too complicated, until Tom saw it. He saw the move that would put his opponent's king in check mate. Just one move and he would win.

"Care to make this interesting Cavanaugh?" he said confidently

"What do you mean?"

"You see, Slytherins never play for fun. We play for leverage. I propose a wager."

"What do you have in mind Riddle?" she said with mild interest. She could work his arrogance to her advantage.

"If I win, you have to be at my beck and call for one whole day." He was very confident.

"And _when_ I win?"

"_When _Cavanaugh? A little overconfident aren't we?" he smirked. 'She doesn't know who she's messing with.'

"Not as overconfident as you Riddle." She smirked back.

"Very well _if _you win, I will grant you the same courtesy." 'But that will never happen.'

"Fine then…I accept."

All were in awe of what she said. How could this new girl be so cocky as to think that she could beat Tom in chess? They were all amazed at the sheer guts of this person. Tom was the best. Everybody knew it. Even the Gryffindors had to admit that.

"Well then Cavanaugh, be prepared to grovel." He said with an amused, sinister, laugh. "Queen to G5." He smirked in triumph.

"You're good Riddle." She announced. He smirked at her. He had finally defeated the girl. He had put her in her place, beneath him (A/N: get your minds out of the gutter!). But his jubilation was put to a halt when a smile came to her lips.

"…But, I'm afraid you're just not good enough. Bishop to G5." Her bishop glided through the chess board and pummeled Tom's queen to pieces and threatened his king. "Check. Mate. I guess that means that I win doesn't it?" She stood up and went out of the common room.

The whole room was in awe. To had once again been beaten by the mysterious new girl. Tom watched her as she left. She slipped out of the room quietly without so much as a look back.

This girl was really getting on his nerves right now, but as the same time, he grew more and more intrigued by her. There was something in the way that she treated him that was so…fresh was the only way he could put it. No one had ever treated him with such lack of respect. No one had ever dared go against him. The whole school did right to fear him, but this girl didn't. This girl held no fear of him whatsoever. The girl also had a power in her that he had never felt in his entire life. It was as if she held great control over all her actions, everything always went how she wanted it. Tom had always been a fan of power.

"Losing your touch Tom?" a voice came from behind him. Malfoy really had a way of sneaking up on people.

"What is it now Abraxas?" a combination of annoyance and anger was in Tom's voice as he spoke.

"I see you were beaten again by the new girl."

"Is there a point to this whole conversation Malfoy." No one really needed to rub in his defeat.

"All that I'm saying is that, we could always use her to our advantage."

"What do you mean?"

"Why don't we talk somewhere a little more private?"

The two got up and walked towards a clandestine room and Malfoy made an interesting proposition.

* * *

Meanwhile, Hermione was walking in the corridors. She had taken a liking to walking around the castle ever since she arrived. She visited all the memorable places she knew. She walked to the lavatory where Ron and Harry had saved her from the mountain troll. She went to the corridors where she and Ron would often have their rows. She sat on the steps facing the spot where she had punched Draco. She visited the place in the greenhouse where Neville had fainted when he neglected to tighten his earmuffs. All of these places were dear to her. These were the places that reminded her of home. They also reminded her why she went back and of what she must do. 

Today, she decided to go to the Quidditch pitch. She sat in the stands and read her book. A cool breeze was in the air and players were zooming all around the air. The whole scene reminded her of her two best friends.

If she were back home, she would probably see Ron and Harry up in the air. They would be zooming in their brooms, practicing the newest tactics for the next Quidditch game.

She would probably be where she was sitting at that moment.

She would watch Harry as he soared in the air.

She would probably smile as she watched him shout at his team mates (A/N: Harry is the captain of course).

She would probably be scolding him for trying the Wronski Feint.

She would probably go down to the pitch when practice was over.

She would probably kiss him in the middle of the pitch.

Harry's kiss. It was probably the thing she missed most of all. His kiss seemed to melt away all her fears and doubts. His kiss was the thing that made all the worries in her disappear. His kiss was what assured her that everything would be alright in the end.

"NEW GIRL!"

The sound of that snapped her from her reverie. The happiness that she had found in her memories slowly faded away as she turned her head to see that the three idiots were once again calling her attention.

"What do you want now?" she said aggravated. How dare those bimbos disturb her!

"We need to talk." Katherine took hold of her wrist and dragged her to the bottom of the stands.

Once they reached the bottom, Hermione wriggled her hands out of Katherine's death grip. "What the hell do you want?" She had had enough of her interruptions!

"Didn't I warn you to stay away from Tom?"

"Listen…if you would just take a while and look around you, instead of looking in the mirror, you would see that I don't like him. Do you hear? I. DON'T. LIKE. RIDDLE!"

"Oh don't try to deny it! You constantly flirt with him! I'm not blind you know! Just keep your filthy hands off him!" Before Hermione could retort, the bitch (A/N: there is really no other name for Katherine!) slapped her! The blood boiled to her head and she had a murderous glint in her eyes.

"I have had enough of you!" her words were that of mixed anger and annoyance. She hated this girl for ripping her from her memories and for constantly insinuating that she liked the malignant ooze that was Tom Riddle! She whipped out her wand and before her opponent could do the same, she had already cast her spell. "EXTEMPRA ARACHNIDA!" at an instant Katherine felt something crawl up her back. She turned and saw a huge, hairy tarantula climbing up her arse!

"Shove that up your arse!" with that she turned away and walked angrily back to the castle.

She was so heated in hate that she didn't even notice that she was headed straight for somebody.

"I'm so sorry." She said as she was trying to sit up.

"It's quite all right Ms. Cavanaugh." When she raised her head, she saw the smiling face of Professor Slughorn. "You are just the person I was looking for."

"Really?" she said as she was brushing off her robes

"Well...yes." he said with a slight chuckle. "You are new her dear girl, but have you come across mentions of the Slug Club by any chance?"

The Slug Club, she knew it very well. She knew all that it was about, but she had to act as if she knew nothing. "No sir."

"Ah well then, you are in for a treat!" he said as she escorted her towards the Slytherin dorms. "The Slug Club is an elite society of the best and the brightest that Hogwarts has to offer. I established it on my arrival here and I've been holding it ever since. I came looking for you so that I could invite you on our next gathering." He smiled

"I'm flattered sir -----" she was cut off before she could say another word.

"Well then it's settled. The meeting will be held in my quarters at around 6 o clock tomorrow evening. If you don't know where it is, I'm sure that Mr. Riddle will be kind enough to escort you." They stopped walking in front of the portrait. "Ah here we are. Delightful to chat with you Nadya. May I call you Nadya?"

"If you wish sir." She said obligingly.

"Very well then, see you tomorrow my dear." He walked away

Hermione was just about to walk in the portrait when…

"Oh and Nadya…"

"Yes sir?"

"Dress robes are required. I'm sure that you will have no trouble acquiring them since tomorrow is a Hogsmead visit."

"Yes sir. I'll be sure to remember."

"And Nadya?"

"Yes sir?"

"The gathering entails that you have a…oh what do you children call it…ah yes…a date."

"I'm sorry sir. A what?" she was surprised to hear that. Where was she going to find a date? She had only been there for less than a week and Slughorn expected her to have a date!

"A date. Oh don't worry child, I've already enlisted the help of Tom in that department." He said with a little laugh. Apparently he found Hermione's panic amusing.

"I'm afraid I don't understand sir…" what was the old man trying to say!

"Tom has agreed to accompany you to the meeting."

"So you asked Riddle to be my date?" 'What is the world coming to? Does everybody think that I like RIDDLE?'

"Yes dear. Oh don't worry, Mr. Riddle is a fine young man and I am sure that you will hit it off quite well. Well then, goodnight again." Slughorn walked away leaving a very shocked Hermione.

'I have a date with the incessant slime! AHHHHHHHH!'

"Well then Cavanaugh. An invitation to the Slug Club. I must say I'm impressed." She turned to see that Riddle was sitting in a fluffy armchair, reading a book.

"Eavesdropping Riddle? How unbecoming of the Head Boy."

"I just couldn't help but overhear." He smirked. Tom really reminded Hermione of Draco. He had the same arrogance and self-assurance that Draco once possessed.

"If you must know… yes I was invited. She started to walk up the stairs, when Tom started to speak again.

"I also guess that the Professor told you about my accompanying you?" his voice seemed cold and annoyed.

"Oh for the love of God!" she was now over the edge. "Why did you do it Riddle? Do you enjoy seeing me in pain? If you must know, your presence is painful enough without me having to spend an entire night being your date!"

"As much as your discomfort pleases me, I didn't do this by my own free will! Slughorn came to me asking for a favor. I unknowingly agreed without so much as a warning that the favor would entail being attached to you!"

"Shouting is pointless. It won't change the situation were in. I suggest we just simply call a truce till the party's over."

"What makes you think that I'll agree to that." He stepped closer to her until the gap between them was non existent.

She tiptoed to his ear and whispered. "Because if you don't, then I'll hold my end of the wager and put you under my services for a whole day." She stepped back and went for the stairs. "Besides Riddle, we wouldn't want that perfect little teacher's pet image ruined now don't we?" With that she opened her door and entered her room.

Tom had never met anyone so manipulative in his whole life…well except for him that is. He found it so interesting that she always managed to get control. She always put dominance on her side.

'Tomorrow will be quite eventful'

**

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A/N: Hey there ya'll hope ya'll like it! Love lots! Oreo points tally will come up next chappie! The busy little beaver has to run and make more dams! **

**Oh and another little thing…my viewer's choice fic is in need of a ship! You get the chance to vote for the ship you want for my upcoming fic I HATE MY LIFE.**

**Please vote A if you want a CedricHermione ship, vote B if ya'll want an OliverHermione fic or vote C if ya'll wanna DracoHermione ship. Send them via private message or reviews! See my profile for more details!**

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**The Tofuubeaver**


	5. A Nudge To The Right Direction

**A/N: Finally! Writer's block is over! I have returned! I'm back baby! Hell yeah! **

**Ok enough of that…sorry didn't get to update guys…been busy making dams as always…well I do have a little surprise for ya'll…this chapter is kinda long…ok its no excuse. Pleeeeeaaaaasssse forgive me! Pleeeeaaaasssse! **

**Wont keep you long and bore you with the sad details of my nonexistent life. On to the fic!**

**IMPORTANT:I refered to Hermione as Nadya in this chapter since this is mainly Tom's POV.**

**Disclaimer1: Owning Harry Potter would be like the reunion of the Beatles…desirable but impossible…just deal with it!**

**

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Chapter Five: A Nudge in The Right Direction **

* * *

Tom got out of the Slytherin Common room that night, still perplexed by Nadya. She was so silent and reserved, but on the other hand she was also manipulative and intelligent. He had never met anyone like her. 

He was still thinking about her when he did his early morning rounds. But his thoughts were interrupted when a voice came from behind.

"Oh Mr. Riddle?"

Tom turned around to see Professor Dumbledore calling him. "Yes sir?"

"Tom, I would like to ask you a favor…"

'What is up with these teacher and asking me favors? Do I have the words errand boy stuck to my forehead!' "What is it sir?" But of course he couldn't say no, but he had learned not to say yes until the details were given to him.

"I would like to ask if you would be willing to give this to Ms. Cavanaugh." The old man took a piece of parchment from his robes and gave it to Tom.

"If you don't mind my asking sir…what is it?"

"It is her consent form to go to Hogsmead today."

"But sir…shouldn't this have come from her parents?" he was curious to know why a teacher would be signing the Hogsmead consent forms instead of a parent.

"Quite right Mr. Riddle, but her parents are no longer with us. They passed away and left Nadya in my care."

"Oh." He didn't know that she had no parents. He didn't know that she was Dumbledore's ward. In fact, he didn't know anything about her, nobody did. She never told anyone anything about her. Tom now added 'secretive' to the list of her characteristics.

"Well then Mr. Riddle, judging by your reaction…I'd say that you didn't know that." He said with a look of curiosity. Tom replied with a nod. "Well then, it would be best if you didn't share that information with anyone else."

"Yes sir."

"I trust that you will deliver the parchment to her?"

"Yes sir."

"Well then Mr. Riddle, goodbye." With that the old man walked away into the next corridor.

Tom walked towards the Slytherin common room to accomplish his errand. He opened the portrait door to find that, instead of her usual position in front of the fire, Nadya was now seated by the window. She looked out into the falling rain and had a look of happiness around her. He would her, once again, smiling. It was really a sight to see. When she smiled, the worry in her face completely disappeared. All that was left in her was pure contentment. She never looked like that when she was around others. It seemed like she would only smile when she was alone. 'Pity,' he thought 'she looks attractive when she smiles. I might be the only one in Hogwarts who has seen her smile. Wait what in the hell am I thinking?' he shrugged off his thoughts and approached her.

Tom tapped her on the shoulder. As soon as she turned her head, the smile vanished and the look of worry and a look of distress once again dawned on her.

"What?" she asked unenthusiastically.

"Professor Dumbledore asked me to give you this." He took out the sheet of parchment and gave it to her. She glanced at it, put it in her pocket and once more turned her attention to the falling rain.

"I didn't know that he was your guardian." He said nonchalantly.

"There's a lot you don't know Riddle." She said with out even looking at him.

She looked out in the window with an expression on her face that could only be read as a plead for solitude. He knew that expression well for it was one he used quite often. He took it as his cue to exit. If he had stayed a little bit longer, he would've seen the solitary tear that fell from her eyes.

* * *

It was six fifty and Tom was impatiently pacing in front of the Slytherin fireplace. He had been there for the past fifteen minutes waiting for his 'date' to come out. Tom was never a patient person. He was also a person who was never late. 

His pacing made his cloak billow in the air; it had a flow to it that would even make Snape envious. He was dressed in all black dress robes that would make any girl drool and make any boy glare at him with envy and hide their girlfriend. (A/N: think of Harry's dress robes in the GoF movie. Harry's robes on Tom…yummy!) His wavy hair was left to fall onto his deep onyx eyes.

He glanced at the grandfather clock again and it was now six fifty five. He had now had it! He climbed up the stairs and banged on her door. He was convinced that if she didn't come out at that instant, he would barge in there and drag her by the ankles if he had to.

"Cavanaugh! Get the bloody hell out here! Does it really take that lo----"

He suddenly fell silent when she opened the door. He could do nothing but stare.

She was wearing a moss green dress that reached the floor. Her curves were highly emphasized by the corset like top of her dress. Her tender russet tendrils were half up and the other half cascaded down to the mid section of her back. A few loose strands fell delicately on her face. She had no jewelry on, save a tiny little necklace with a small golden heart on it. She was beautiful; no amount of hate for her could deny or cloud that fact.

When he realized that he was gaping at the girl, he quickly regained composure. "Finally. I trust you're ready to leave now." She turned around, took a cloak from her closet and stepped out of the room. He extended his arm to her, and she reluctantly accepted. Together, they walked to Professor Slughorn's office.

"Ah Tom, Nadya! I was afraid you'd be late." As soon as they passed through the doors, Professor Slughorn came up to them and greeted them with a big hug.

"Thank you for inviting me sir." She said quietly.

"Not at all Nadya! You are one of my finest students and it is a pleasure having you here. You look quite enchanting my dear, wouldn't you say so Tom?" said the pudgy Potions master as he turned to Tom.

"Yes sir." He couldn't refute that fact. As Slughorn so eloquently put it, she was certainly enchanting.

"Ah well since you are new here Nadya, I would like to introduce you to a few of the members here. Tom, I'm sure you wouldn't mind if I steal her for a while."

"Of course not sir."

Tom watched as Slughorn whisked her away and introduced her to a variety of people. But even though he introduced her to every affluent member of the Wizarding society, there was a look of boredom in Nadya's eyes from what Tom could see.

She looked as if she didn't care who she was being introduced to.

'Knowing Cavanaugh, she would rather be alone than with a crowd.' He thought. He was surprised at his thoughts. They suggested that he knew the girl well, after all, he was the only one in the entirety of Hogwarts that could spark a conversation with her…no matter what the annoyance it brought out in both of them.

His eyes suddenly widened when he saw someone approach her. It was that crazy stalker of his, Katherine Levin. She was approaching Nadya with a murderous glint in her eyes.

This Katherine girl literally threw herself at him every time they met. Tom hated that girl with a passion, but she didn't seem to notice. He had actually heard rumors about her threatening Nadya…he didn't actually think they were true, though the one about Cavanaugh shoving a spider up Katherine's arse thoroughly amused him.

Tom watched as the deranged debutant advanced towards Nadya and he found himself overtaken by a strange impulse to go up there and save her from the mad woman…as he did.

"Cavanaugh." He said as he walked to her. She turned around only to find herself being scooped up by Tom an lead to the dance floor.

A waltz was playing and she could feel herself being lead gracefully around the floor as she danced with Harry's killer.

'Not yet.'

"Why Riddle?" she muttered. 'Why did you have to kill him.'

"Because Lunatic Levin was about to murder you." He said as his eyes focused on hers. Apparently he didn't actually understand the nature of her question.

She looked into his eyes and tried to search for the evil she knew lurked within, but she saw nothing. His eyes were a blank pool of liquid midnight. They betrayed no emotion or feeling. They were just…empty, but somehow she was starting to feel drawn to them.

'This has got to stop.' She thought.

Professor Slughorn watched intently as his two best students glided around to the beat of the waltz. He thought of them both as the two opposite sides of a magnet…they would come together eventually. But in his opinion, they needed a little nudge towards the right direction.

The music stopped and the two spit apart instantly, much to Slughorn's dismay.

"Tom! Nadya! Could you please come here?" Slughorn signaled. The couple obeyed and joined their professor and his party. "I was just telling Mr. Anderson here how excellent you are at potions my dear." He said to Nadya.

"I'm sure you exaggerated sir." She replied humbly.

"I most certainly did not. Don't you think so Tom?"

Tom didn't know what to say. Admitting that she was brilliant would be admitting defeat but he couldn't very well tell Slughorn that she wasn't brilliant at Potions because then he would know that he was lying. He just decided to be safe and nodded in reply.

"Your parents must be very proud of you." Said the Anderson boy.

She went silent.

"It's alright my dear girl. He doesn't know." The Professor tried to reassure her.

"Don't know what?" asked Anderson.

'He obviously doesn't know when to put his foot in his mouth.' Thought Tom.

"You see Mr. Anderson, Nadya's parents died the day before she came to Hogwarts. They were killed by Grindewald's men."

"How did you know sir?" she said weakly.

"Professor Dumbledore told me my dear, I pressed the matter very much on him…my curiosity got the better of me. I'm terribly sorry I interfered." She just replied with a weak nod.

"So she has no one?" Tom saw that Nadya went pale at this remark.

'Really! This Anderson fellow should know when to shut up!'

"Will you please excuse me sir." She didn't even wait for a response. She just darted out of the room leaving a few shocked people behind.

"Was it something I said?" said a dumbfounded Anderson.

"You think!" Tom didn't know what came over him. There was a sudden rush of anger in him…and it was all directed towards Anderson. He was angry that he had hurt her like that. Even he wasn't insensitive enough to bring up her family.

"I think you should go after her Tom." Said a very sullen Slughorn.

He nodded in agreement and ran outside the room to find her.

* * *

Tom had been walking around the castle for an hour now. He had looked everywhere…her room, the common room, the library…classrooms…everywhere. He couldn't find her. Finally, while he was searching near the 5th floor of the castle he heard a sound. It was a sweet melody that filled the air. Since he was the Head Boy, it was his duty t investigates who was out of bed at that hour. He followed the harmony until his ears led him to the Astronomy Tower. 

There he saw her. She had her knees pressed upon her chest, and hear head leaned on the wall while turned toward the window as she looked to the night sky. Tears were falling down her eyes as she sang her sorrows away.

Her voice was shaky, but she still sang beautifully. It seemed ironic to him that she made such an optimistic song seem so depressing, but he couldn't turn away…he just stood there and listened to her melancholy song.

He noticed that the tears were now falling heavier than ever. She could barely sing because of her tears…but she sang on and he remained captivated. As she sang now… she fingered the little golden heart on her necklace. She caressed it dearly as if it were the only thing in the world that could comfort her.

Her form basked in the moonlight and it seemed to give her a luminescent glow. She still managed to look beautiful amidst all her sorrow.

The song had ended and she fell silent. She stopped crying as if she had run out of tears to shed. She was still holding on to her necklace though. She held on it with a tight grip as she just sat there staring towards the moon.

He wondered if he should go to her, when she obviously wanted to be alone. Then again…she needed to be comforted. But what did he know about comfort. He had never felt it in all his life let alone give it. He was confused, but before he could do anymore she spoke.

"Harry sang that to me whenever I cried." She suddenly said, still fingering the little trinket around her neck.

She seemed to be in a trance for it seemed like she was speaking to herself.

"He said that I should never lose hope, not for a moment."

Tom was hidden in the shadows quite well, so he didn't even think that she was talking to him. He just stayed and watched her, he somehow couldn't look away.

"I know you're there Riddle."

He was shocked. She had known that he was there the entire time. 'How could she have known?' He stepped out form the shadows.

"The professor sent me to look for you." He said in a tone of seriousness.

"Well you've found me…now what?" she was still not looking at him. She just stared blankly out the window. "Do you want to know how they died?"

He said nothing. No matter how curious he was about this girl, he didn't think that it was in his place to ask.

"I was in the library. I was getting ready for this big test that I even forgot what day it was. I was so wrapped up that I forgot what day it was…until Harry came to me and tried to remind me."

"_Hermione!" it was Harry. He had walked into the library and found Hermione hidden by a mountain of books, parchments and scrolls._

"_What!" she exclaimed irritated. She peered above her books and saw Harry walking towards her. "Hey Harry!" she said excitedly, though she still didn't move form her position._

"_What are you doing here?" he sat himself beside her and gave her a kiss on the cheek._

"_Obviously Harry, I'm studying now why don't you just play wizard's chess with Ron because you are too much of a distraction…"_

"_But—"_

"_No buts. I have to finish McGonagall's essay by tonight or else she'll have my head. Besides the Charms test is tomorrow and I still am not ready for that."_

"_You seriously don't remember what day it is, don't you?" he said with a small chuckle. He loved the way his girlfriend always threw in 100 percent at whatever she did._

"_What do you mean?" she still didn't look at him. She was scribbling notes on a sheet of parchment._

"_Come with me." Harry tugged her hand and stood her up. She reluctantly stood up, but was still scribbling notes._

"_But Harry---" she protested._

"_Like you said, no buts. Besides, I just want to show you something and then if you want you can come back here." He kissed her forehead reassuringly._

"_Fine, but you promise I can come back."_

"_Only if you want to." He said with a twinkle I his eyes that could rival Dumbledore's._

"_Fine then Potter, let's get this over with." And she followed him to the Gryffindor Tower._

"If I had known that that were going to be my last moments with him, I would have savored it instead about worrying about my stupid essay."

"_SURPRISE!" _

_Everyone was assembled in the Gryffindor Common Room. Her parents, the professors, the entire Weasley family, and all her friends from the other houses…everyone was there. She stood there speechless while Harry beamed at her reaction._

"_Did you plan all of this?" she asked him._

"_With a little help fro----" he was cut off when Hermione suddenly flung her arms around his neck and crashed her lips on his. They kissed feverishly until they realized that an entire room of people was watching them._

_Ron looked with awe. Ginny looked with glee. Fred and George looked like they wanted to puke. God only knows how Draco took all this. He just look like he'd been scared for life._

_The room was in silence while Harry and Hermione blushed in embarrassment. Finally, Mrs. Weasley decided to break the hush. "Well dear…how about we cut the cake." Everyone was glad to oblige._

"_Still want to leave?" Harry whispered in her ear._

"_Not for the world." She squeezed his hand. This was definitely the best birthday she had ever had._

"We shouldn't have had the party. We really shouldn't have. We were having too much fun that we got caught off guard."

_Fred and George were now providing the entertainment by making random objects sing 'Happy Birthday'. The highlight was when they made a figurine of a chicken dance the Irish jig. They were all laughing that they didn't expect what came next._

"_They're here! They're here!" The portrait door swung open and a ragged looking Lupin came flying in the common room._

"_What do you mean Remus? Who's here?" Tonks instantly flung to the Lycan's side only to find him drenched in blood and sweat. "What happened Remus?"_

"_The Death Eaters just broke the wards around the castle." Everyne gasped in awe. "They're coming this way. And Voldemort was leading them."_

"_Then it has come at last." Said Professor McGonagall. _

"_The final battle." Harry said with a sense of finality in his voice._

"_Let's not lollygag now! Get the students to Hogsmead and alert the other houses. Order Members…" she looked around at the sullen members of the Order. "It's time." They all set themselves. Tonight was the night. The final battle. None of them knew if they would die that night…though all of them prepared for it._

"The dark wizards came that night." She chose her words carefully. She didn't want to blow her cover. Though she didn't want to relive the experience, she had to. This was part of the plan. "They attacked. My I just heard that my parents died and I couldn't help them." It was true.

"_Hermione!" Ginny came running in the halls to Hermione, who was fighting a Slytherin Death Eater. _

"_Hermione!" Ginny hit Hermione's opponent with a curse and he instantly dropped to the ground. The redhead ran towards her friend and saw tears flowed from her eyes._

"_What happened Gin? Is it Harry?" That was the first thing that entered her mind.A million fears suddenly rushed though her mind. It killed her to think that Harry might be hurt._

"_No Mione." Somehow Hermione felt a sort of relief in what her friend just said but that relief vanished when she saw Ginny drop her gaze to the floor. _

_Then what is it Gin?" she said with a tang of uncertainty and dread in her voice._

"_It's your parents Hermione. They're dead." Hermione gasped at the declaration. "I saw them die." Tears started to spill from both their eyes._

"_No…" she said shakily. _

"_Yes. I saw it and I couldn't do anything. I'm so sorry." Hermione fell to the ground and cried. Ginny wrapped her arms around her distort friend until their heads shot up when they heard something._

"_RUN! GO!" It was Neville._

"I saw them die one by one. I couldn't do anything. They died right before my eyes and I couldn't do anything."

She finally let the necklace go when tears flowed from her eyes and she bowed her head to her knees. She was now crying in front of the man who would one day kill Harry.

Tom couldn't believe what he was seeing. He looked in shock at the sight of seeing her cry. She was the strongest person he had ever known (this opinion was formed mainly because she didn't fear him.) and he just stood there as she crumbled right in front of him. She turned to him and spoke.

"Now you know. What you do with the information is no concern of mine. Tell it to all of your lackeys…I don't care. Just don't pity me…though I doubt that that would happen." With that she turned back to the window and gazed back at the moon.

He took a few steps backward and turned around. How was he supposed to respond? He had never seen anyone cry nor cry himself. This was totally new ground for him. He started to walk away, when he heard her suddenly cry again. He couldn't stand the sound of it. A painful stab in his heart told him to go back. He had never felt that before. Again, this was all new. She brought out a whole new range of emotions in him and he didn't know why.

He turned back and tapped her on the shoulder.

She looked up at him with her eyes all watered up, but that couldn't mask her surprise.

He extended his had to her and handed her his immaculately white handkerchief.

"Here." He said simply.

She took the handkerchief from him and wiped her tears. Before she could even say thank you, he was already gone.

'It'll take time. But I will find out your weakness.'

**

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A/N: Did ya'll like it? I have now revealed part of the puzzle which is Hermione's plan…hmmm are you now in suspense! I hope ya'll are…I hope this one didn't disappoint.**

**The story about what happened the day the Death Eaters came is my peace offering to all of you for not updating soon. Please accept it with wide open arms.**

**On to the OREO POINTS!**

**5 OREO POINTS to redroseternity for getting all three questions correct! Hell yeah! Rock on!**

**3 OREO POINTS to Angelic Bladez for getting two questions correct but I give you a special glass of milk for thinking that Merrythought might get a spider up his arse…man that made me laugh…I almost pissed in my pants at the thought! **

**2 OREO POINTS to aznchic2009 for getting one question right! Rock on!**

**Now that that's established…time for the next set of questions…**

_**Do ya'll think that Hermione's going to thank Tom?**_

_**Is Tom going to be nice to Hermione now?**_

_**What was Malfoy's proposition for Tom (see last chapter…I was such in a hurry that I didn't ask that question last time. LOL!)**_

**Well there you have it…also here are the preliminary results for the ship poll:**

**A (CedricHermione) - 2**

**B (OliverHermione) - 1**

**C (DracoHermione) - 4**

**There you go! But don't worry…this can still change! Vote till Fe. 13 so you can see your favorite ship on my next fic I HATE MY LIFE! **

**Remember A for CDHG, B for OWHG, and C for DMHG! Vote now!**

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**The Tofuubeaver**


	6. A Lot To Think About

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait! Writer's block is a bitch and midterms are hell!**

**I wont keep you guys waiting! On to the fic!**

**Disclaiamer: I wish I owned Harry Potter! I wish I owned Harry Potter! I wish I owned Harry Potter! Hmmm…nothing happened, so I still don't own it!**

* * *

Hermione never came to the great hall anymore. She never sat in the common room and never went to the library. During her free time, she would just stay in the astronomy tower… thinking. She thought about everything that happened that night.

No…she didn't think about the night that Harry and all that her friends died…it was different now. She thought about the night that Riddle gave her a handkerchief. She found it immensely intriguing.

First of all, she wondered why in the world he would go looking for her after she stormed out. It puzzled her to think that he actually searched the entire castle looking for her.

'Of course, Slughorn might have something to do with that…and the fact that he is head boy is about reason enough. But then again he could have just lied to Slughorn and told him that he couldn't find me. God knows how capable Riddle is of lying. But he didn't. He looked for me….'

Another thought entered her mind. Riddle watched her.

'That could have been enough. He could have just told Slughorn that he found me…and I just wanted to be alone. Now that wouldn't be lying anymore. But he watched me…'

Then she remembered the way he listened to her.

'He could have just left. He could have easily turned around and left…but then again…he is a person of curiosity. But he has other means of getting that information…a lot of other means. He didn't have to listen to me…but he did. He listened to me…"

But the thing that struck her most was when he gave her a handkerchief. It was the first human act that she ever saw him do.

'Who am I kidding! Why am I thinking about him! Why am I sitting here and thinking about him! HE'S THE REASON MY PARENTS ARE DEAD! HE'S THE REASON WHY I CAN NEVER HELP NEVILLE WITH POTIONS AGAIN! HE'S THE REASON WHY DRACO ISN'T HERE TO SMIRK AT ME ANYMORE! HE'S THE REASON WHY I CAN NEVER HAVE ROWS WITH RON EVER AGAIN! HE. KILLED. HARRY! HE KILLED HIM! I shouldn't be thinking about him! I shouldn't care about anything he does! But…I do… why…why… because he cared. He cared enough to wipe away my tears…even though it was through a handkerchief… I mean this is the guy's first act of kindness…I didn't expect a grand gesture. He cared enough to wipe away my tears…that was Harry's job…oh Harry…what am I going to do?'

She didn't move. She sat there motionless and constant. She didn't want to move a muscle. She was lost.

'What am I going to do…'

* * *

Tom sat in the Head's common room. The Slytherin common room didn't appeal to him these days. Too many people. He just sat there in front of the fire. This was something he had seen Nadya do quite often. He wanted to know what was so fascinating about the flames. Why did she stare into them so often?

As he stared, he thought about her. Nadya Cavanaugh…the perpetual enigma.

Some people were starting to say that Nadya was the female version of Tom Riddle. It didn't puzzle him. In many ways, they were alike.

They were both intellectually indomitable. They had marks that the Ravenclaws would gladly kill for. Nadya even surpassed the marks of the Head Girl… Amy (the Head Girl) didn't even come close. Nadya was brilliant in all of her subjects. It almost threatened Tom to think that she might even get higher grades than him…almost. She never did surpass him, she didn't even care.

They were also both cunning and manipulative. He had never met a person that rivaled him in the art of manipulation. She had an undeniable talent for it. Everything always went her way. Never was a time that she was surprised by events or was shocked by her environment. It was like that everything fell completely into place. She could make anybody do anything…even him. Tom winced at the memory of her threatening him that night before the Slug Club meeting. He hated the thought of being a pawn in someone else's chessboard. He was supposed to be he one who moved the pieces around, not her. Though the fact did irritate him…it intrigued him as well.

They were both mysterious. No one could deny that Nadya Cavanaugh was mysterious. Nobody knew anything about her. She talked to nobody…though many have approached her. She just kept to herself. He was the only person that knew anything about her. He was the only person who she talked to,even though it was more out of annoyance that she even spoke to him…and not out of friendship. That intrigued him even more.

They were both equally cold. They treated everybody the same…with glares, sneers or no attention at all. She somehow kept her heart closed. It was ice. Nobody could touch it. Nobody could come near it. And nobody would dare try to open it. Her heart was just as every bit as cold as his. He figured, though, that unlike his, (that was innately frozen) hers only hardened due to the hardships that she was exposed to. From what she told him…she had been through a lot.

'Why am I even thinking about her? Damn that girl…such an enigma.'

But he couldn't deny to himself that that was the part of her that had him so enticed. He was always fond of solving puzzles. Nadya Cavanaugh was the most challenging so far.

She was his match…in more ways than one.

'Perhaps I will consider Malfoy's proposal.'

* * *

"Good morning class" said a very familiar old man, while cleaning his half moon spectacles. "Today, we will be attempting to pull a rabbit from a hat"

The whole class was shocked. Wasn't that a muggle illusion? Why in the heck would they be trying to learn that?

"Professor, isn't that a muggle thing?" asked one student.

"Oh quite the contrary… the real magic is not so much as pulling it out…but in conjuring it."

Now that sounded more like something worth learning.

"Yes, today we will be learning how to conjure animals…small ones first. Once you have perfected it, we can move on to bigger animals like lions, tigers and bears."

"Oh my!" said another student. "Won't that be difficult sir?"

"Exactly. This will be very difficult…so I would suggest that you all find partners." With that the occupants of the classroom started scurrying to find tolerable partners.

"Excuse me?" a voice came from behind Hermione.

"Yes?" she turned around to see that it was Malfoy. 'Does he seriously always have to be the voice behind me!'

"I would like to ask if you would like to be my partner for the activity." He said in a mock gentlemanly fashion.

Hermione rolled her eyes in utter annoyance, but seeing that there was not enough time to argue with him (and seeing that everybody else was taken) she reluctantly agreed.

"Fine."

Seeing that the whole class was now paired up…"Good. Now class, now that you have your partners…I want you to aim your wands to that hats on your table and simultaneously say _Hayoptio._ Once your task is done, please raise your hands so that I may assess your work. Are there any questions?" Dumbledore looked around to see that no one was raising their hands. "Very well then. You may begin." With that, the old man sat behind his desk and watched the events unfold.

"Nadya may I ask you something?" said the annoying Malfoy as he took Hermione to his table.

"If you must." She replied annoyed.

"You told me once that you have some knowledge of the Dark Arts am I correct?"

"Yes." 'Where is he going with this?'

"Well, I was wondering if you would like to learn more of it?" he said with the trademark Malfoy smirk.

"What do you mean Malfoy?"

"We have a secret society in Hogwarts. It is only open to those of exceptional talent such as your person. I have petitioned for your membership and the head of our society has finally agreed to it." He made it sound like a business deal by the way he was speaking.

"Do you mean that you are inviting me to be a member of some secret organization that dabbles in the Dark Arts?"

'Oh my God…they want me to join the Death Eaters? I didn't even know that I had been set up already.' She thought, trying not to show her bewilderment.

"Not just the Dark Arts…it is so much more than that." He said with such pride. He obviously held the society in high esteem. "Do you accept the invitation?"

They were now close to the table. Only a few more steps. She had to give an answer. There was not enough time to think about it. She had to answer now.

"Yes." She didn't know if it was going to be beneficial for her or whether she would regret it later, but there was no turning back. She had decided.

"Good." he smirked. "I will inform him immediately."

Somehow Hermione knew about the 'him' that Malfoy was referring to.

"Shall we get to work then?" He said has he pointed his wand towards the hat.

"Very well." Pointing her own wand towards the hat.

"_HAYOPTIO!" _and instantly a rabbit jumped out of the hat.

As they said those words, she couldn't help but notice the pair of deep onyx eyes watching her.

'I have sealed my fate.' She said as she sullenly raised her hand to tell Dumbledore that they had finished the task.

* * *

Tom watched Malfoy and Nadya. He new what was going on.

The day of the chess game, Malfoy had a proposition for him.

"_Tom, I have a proposition for you…" said a smirking Malfoy._

"_Yes, I'm listening." He replied as he sat back in an arm chair. Malfoy looked excited about his little proposal. Naturally, this ticked Tom's curiosity. He was always very curious. He wanted to know everything going on._

"_It's regarding Nadya Cavanaugh."_

"_What about her?" the topic of this girl always intrigued her. She was the ultimate puzzle._

"_I was wondering if you would consider allowing me to recruit her to be a member of the Knights of Walpurgis."_

"_Why would I consider that?" 'But then again why wouldn't I?' he thought. _

"_Think about it Tom, she is powerful and she told me herself that she has knowledge of the Dark Arts. She would be a true asset to the society." He said with conviction._

"_Are you sure that you aren't just driven by a pretty face Abraxas?" He couldn't believe that he had just admitted that she was pretty. Then again, it wasn't a lie…she did have some aesthetic value. He just shrugged off the thought. He just couldn't believe he just said that._

"_I am sure Tom. You have seen it yourself. She is powerful as well as cunning. She is manipulative and that would certainly be enough to make you consider her as a potential."_

_He made an excellent point. As much as Tom wanted to deny it, those qualities alone would be enough for her to be considered as a potential. But he didn't want her to be in the society. There was animosity between them. Besides, it would certainly be a challenge to get her to follow orders. Luckily for Malfoy, Tom loved challenges. _

"_I will think about it." He said, finally._

"_Thank you Tom." He nodded._

It was this morning that Tom finallyagreed to Malfoy's proposition. He decided that he needed to think of the Knights and not his personal thoughts. Besides, he did love challenges.

After the class, he walked out of the room but was interrupted when Malfoy stood in his way. He was smirking.

'What is with this idiot and smirking?'

"Is there a reason why you're blocking my way Abraxas… or is it just for your amusement?"

"She has agreed."

"Very well, inform her of the meeting tonight. We'll introduce her to the rest then. Meanwhile Malfoy, I would thank you to step out of my way."

"As you wish." With that, Malfoy stepped to the side, and Tom continued walking.

* * *

"Tonight dear Knights, I have called you all because we have a new member." Tom stood in the Head's common room with all the Knights of Walpurgis. She is known to most of you so you need not worry of her merit. Our own Abraxas Malfoy was the one who petitioned for her membership and ---" Tom was interrupted by the sudden entrance of the two people of which he was speaking of. "Malfoy. Late as usual."

"I apologize Tom..." He bowed in contrition. "…fellow Knights." He bowed to them as well.

"'Where is she Abraxas?" asked one of the members.

"I see Tom has already told you." He smirked.

'He should really lay off the smirking. Honestly, once a day is enough. ' thought Tom.

"I believe you all know Nadya Cavanaugh?"

A girl came in through the portrait door. It left every one in shock.

"Cavanaugh." Said Tom curtly.

"Riddle…I should have known that you had so many under your thumb."

"How dare you---" said a member as he stood up.

"Silence Dolohov!" snapped Tom. Immediately, Dolohov fell silent and sat back in his seat."

"Don't expect that just because I joined your little club, that I will suddenly be submissive and docile." She said, looking directly at Tom.

"I wouldn't expect you to." He replied. 'This is definitely going to be interesting.' "As I was saying…Malfoy has petitioned Cavanaugh here to be a member of the Knights…I trust all of you trust my judgment in letting her in?" No one questioned him. "Very well then…come here Cavanaugh."

She walked up to him and stood directly in front of him. This close proximity would have made any girl swoon, but she was definitely different.

"Now Cavanaugh…since you are a member of the Knights, I would like to introduce you to the rest of the members." She turned around to see that there were only a few of them…but that was the entirety of the group.

'This is obviously a very exclusive society.' She thought.

"That one over there is Antonin Dolohov." Tom pointed to the one he had silenced earlier. The boy was long brown hair. His eyes were the color of steel and his complexion was pale. "He is an expert at techniques of torture, his family has been in the business for years."

Dolohov nodded. "Welcome to the Knights Cavanaugh."

"Over there…" as he pointed to the next person. "…is Fenrir Greyback. A werewolf and a military genius." Fenrir had long straggly black hair that fell on his eyes. His eyes had a look of malice on them that could only be attained by performing an act of murder.

Fenrir nodded and looked at her. "Welcome to the Knights girl."

"Next to him is Eileen Prince. A master at potions." The girl looked like the female version of Snape. Crooked nose…greasy hair. It was no wonder that this woman was his mother.

Eileen looked at her and nodded. "Welcome to the Knights"

"Finally, that one is Alphard Black. He is a member of one of the most prestigious families in the Wizarding World. Black also has a clear talent for obtaining information." This was Sirius's uncle who had given him the insane amount of money he had. He looked terribly like Sirius, sleek black hair and deep blue eyes.

'But isn't he supposed to be good?'

Alphard nodded, like all the others. "Welcome to the Knights Nadya." He said with a smile.

"Since you've already met Malfoy…I believe that no introductions are necessary. You may all go. The next meeting will be held three weeks from now. Good night to you all." With that the people stood up and left the room, leaving only Nadya and Tom. "I said you can go Cavanaugh." He said turning to her.

She didn't answer. She only pulled a white handkerchief from her pocket and put it in his hand. He stared at it a little. This was his handkerchief. The one he had given her that night at the Astronomy Tower. Now she was giving it back to him.

He looked up only to see that she was heading for the portrait door. Upon reaching the door, she looked back at him.

"What did you expect Riddle, a thank you card?" and she walked out of the dorm…leaving him alone in his common room again.

He put the handkerchief in his pocket and sat down in the big arm chair. He once again had the uncontrollable urge to watch the fire. He had a lot to think about.

**

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A/N: There you go! It took me forever but it's done! I hope it doesn't disappoint…by the way Oreos to all those who got it right! Ha! I really have to go now coz I haven't eaten dinner yet! Oreos to all those who reviewed and I leave you know with only three requests:**

**Please review! And please go look at the new teaser I have posted on my homepage! Finally please vote on the poll have put up!**

**Now I must go for the tummy calls and I am but it's slave!**

**Oreos to the person who will find my Wizard of Ozreference!**

**TTFN!**

**The Tofuubeaver**


	7. 2 am Converstaions Only Add Confusion

**A/N: This is just a short update…it actually isn't he best thing I have ever written so pardon the crappiness... I am in a foul mood today…actually…I've been in a foul mood all week.**

**Disclaimer: If Potter were mine, I wouldn't actually be writing this now would i. I would be busy writing book 7 as we speak. But since I'm not, I think it's safe to establish that I don't own anything.**

_

* * *

Hermione was running._

_Her heartbeat raced with trepidation as she desperately tried to evade her attacker. She ran through pitch dark corridors, not knowing where her feet would lead her. All she knew was that she had to escape. _

_She had to survive._

_She kept on running. Each step filled with fear and dread that she would be caught. That she would be held captive. _

_She was getting tired. She was feeling that she couldn't run anymore. She was just so tired. But she had to escape. She had to run, no matter what._

_Her feet brought her to a dark room. The color of midnight, she couldn't see a thing. Everything was so dark. _

_She hears footsteps. _

_She starts to panic. She can hardly think of her next move. What was she going to do?_

_The steps grew louder and louder._

_She is now desperate for a way out. She runs about the room. She bangs on the walls, searches for windows and stomps on the floors. _

_Nothing._

_All hope was gone. The steps haunted her. She would never get out. The steps were like a death sentence for her. She was trapped._

_Suddenly, the foot steps stop. Everything is silent. She realized that the sound of the steps was far better than the unnerving silence that enveloped itself around the room. She hears something._

_A breath. The breath of her assailant._

_She takes a big gulp. She swallows up all her fear and musters enough courage to stare into the eyes of the enemy._

_She turns around and sees a pair of deep onyx eyes staring back at her._

Hermione woke up that night. This dream had been different than all of the others. There was no Harry. There was no blood. There was no death. Only pure fear.

The meeting last night had scared the hell out of her. She didn't show it, but she was scared.

'What have I gotten myself into?'

She had just entered the inner circles of the Future Dark Lord. There would be no turning back now. This was it. She couldn't back out now. She was a Knight. History would now remember her as one of the founding members of what would be called as the Death Eaters.

'What am I going to do?'

Normally, if she had a dilemma as big as this, she would go to the wisest man she knew. She would go to Dumbledore. But she couldn't do that. She couldn't risk letting him know about the future. It was too dangerous. She had no one to turn to. She was alone.

She decided that she couldn't very well go to bed. Not after that dream.

She got a robe and covered herself up. She took something from her trunk. She slipped out of her room and headed for the common room.

She went down the staircase only to see that someone was in her regular place. Someone was seated in front of the fire. She walked closer to see the mysterious student's face. It wasn't actually clear. As she drew nearer, she came to see his face.

"Riddle?" she said in a quiet but surprised voice.

"Cavanaugh?" he said as he turned to face her.

Hermione saw something in Tom's eyes that night that she had never seen in his onyx eyes. It was confusion. She had never known Tom Riddle to be the confused type. He was the kind of person who was always sure about things, he didn't like to be kept in the dark…but his eyes told another story. He was confused.

"What are you doing here?" he asked her.

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" she replied, taking the seat beside his. "Don't you have your own common room?"

"Slytherin is home and will always be." He replied simply, returning his gaze to the flames.

"Strange, you find it home, but you hardly come here anymore." She focused her stare to the flame as well.

"Too many people…but you're one to talk. It's not like you've graced us with your presence recently."

"Touché Riddle…but what really brings you here to the common room this late at night?"

"I don't sleep much." He said simply.

"Join the club…I hardly sleep through the night anymore." She didn't even know why she was telling him this.

They sat in silence for a while. Both with their eyes fixed on the embers. The silence was broken when one decided to resolve an unanswered question.

"Why do you stare into the fire?"

Hermione was startled by the question. One moment, they were staring into the flame, the next he was asking her why she did it. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, why do you stare at it? What so interesting about it that you usually spend hours just staring into it?"

"You're one to ask."

"I only stare at it because I am curious about what's so special about the fire that you take hours just looking at it." He never took his gaze from the fire.

"You and your curiosity."

"Stop being evasive and just answer the question Cavanaugh."

"Fine." She said, never taking her gaze from the flames. "When I look into them, I see a ballet. The embers dance to an inaudible music. All their moves are orchestrated, even though they're so different. The fire just moves with such grace and fluidity that every time I look at it, I can't seem to tear my eyes from the majesty of their ballet."

She turned her head to see that Tom was looking at her. She once again found the confusion hidden in his eyes. "What are you confused about Riddle?"

"What?"

"You heard me." She said firmly. Tom wasn't that daft…. Actually, he wasn't daft at all so he had absolutely no excuse to tell her that he didn't understand her.

"What makes you think that I am confused?" tearing his eyes from her, to a random object in the fireplace mantle.

"It's in your eyes…." she said.

"And your supposed to be the expert on reading people?" he said sardonically.

"Look who's being evasive now Riddle… you still hasn't answered my question."

"What do you mean?" he said coldly.

"Why are you confused?"

He looked at her. She was determined to know. Why was she so determined? Why did she always have to know? But more importantly, why did he always have to play in to her plans?

"I love puzzles. I guess it's because of my curiosity. I've always had the uncanny need to solve them. But now there's this one puzzle that I can't seem to get…it's the most complicated one yet. It's full of unexpected twists and surprising outcomes. I don't know whether I should continue in trying to solve it. Is the satisfaction of knowing it going to be reward enough?" he said this all in a cold manner, though it was still a mystery to him why he was even telling her all of this. He wasn't that chatty type to begin with. This was totally unlike him in all respects.

Hermione wasn't daft. She knew what he was talking about. She had a brain after all…but what she should tell Riddle. If she told him to continue with the puzzle, then that would screw her over. If she told him to stop, then he would notice that she knew what was going on. She had to choose the lesser evil.

"Solve it. That's what I would do." She had chosen. 'The consequences will have to wait till tomorrow to bite me in the arse.'

"Why so civil tonight Cavanaugh?" he wondered.

"It's two in the morning Riddle. I don't really have the energy to fight with you at two in the morning. I'm guessing the same goes for you?"

"I guess so." He actually didn't know why he was suddenly tolerating her intrusion on his privacy. The alibi she provided seemed to be the soundest argument so far…so he naturally accepted it. "Two isn't really the best time for one of your delightful little quips."

"I agree."

Hearing him say that she was actually being civil alarmed Hermione. Was she really being civil to the Dark Lord? Was she really being civil to the murderer of a countless number of innocent people?

But, then again, something was different right now. All her tears had been spilled. None were left in her eyes. She was numb to the sorrow and pain now. She felt it, but hardly ever felt the after-effects anymore. Tonight, Tom didn't feel like a mass murderer or an evil Dark wizard bent on world domination. He was just Tom, nothing more and nothing less. She didn't know why, but it just felt that way.

"My turn to ask Riddle." She said as she snapped herself from her own reverie.

"What are we doing twenty questions?" he snapped, it had less venom now.

"Unfortunately, you got me started on it…" he eyed her skeptically but did nothing to prevent her from asking her question. "Why let me in?"

"Excuse me?" 'Let her in on what? Damn confusing girl!'

"Why did you even consider letting me in the Knights? I mean, it's no secret that we don't like each other."

"I let you in because Malfoy asked me to." He said…like he was going to tell her the real reason.

"Oh cut the crap Riddle. I thought you were a better liar than that. Do you really expect me to believe that Tom Riddle would actually allow himself to be ordered around by anyone? Tell me the real reason." She said. They weren't actually looking at one another. Both had their eyes on the fire. It was like they weren't even talking at all.

"You are manipulative. You are cunning and you have power."

"If I didn't know better Riddle, I'd say that was a compliment coming form you."

"Savor it, it'll be the last." He said in a low voice. He didn't normally give people compliments…but the early morning was like Veritaserum that made him spill his guts out. "My turn to ask."

"In a talkative mood today aren't we Riddle." She smirked.

"Why did you join?" he said with a tone of mild interest. It was totally contradictory to his inner thoughts…her acceptance actually came as quite a shock to him, though he'd never express it.

"I joined because…I must say that I was curious by the offer."

"What do you mean?" he asked dryly

"The fact that you tackle the Dark Arts and haven't been caught yet certainly tickled my curiousity…besides, Malfoy said that you did much more than that. Naturally, I wanted to know."

"You know what they say Cavanaugh…curiosity killed the cat." He smirked.

"But as you said Riddle, satisfaction brought it back." She inwardly smiled. She had just used his own words against him. It was quite ironic.

"Touché Cavanaugh…" he smirked. He faced her and noticed that an elaborately designed box was on her lap. Curiosity once again got the better of him. "What is that?" he said as he pointed to the box in question.

"None of your business." She snapped as she glided her fingers across the surface of the box.

"You know Cavanaugh; I do have my ways of knowing, so better tell me know." He said in a very menacingly threatening voice.

"Riddle…you better not poke your head where it shouldn't be. You never know when it might be cut off." She returned the threat. She put the box inside the pocket of her robes. She stood up and made her way to the stairs.

"That's another thing I wonder about you Cavanaugh. Why don't you fear me?" he asked. Hermione stopped in her tracks.

"What is there to fear?" she started walking again and entered her room.

Meanwhile, she left a boy, who once again looked into the flames.

'You have no idea.'

**

* * *

A/N: Not the longest update in the world…certainly not the best either…I need something to make me smile…just haven't found it yet.**

**Crap! This is utter CRAP! Forgive me for this chapter…I promise I will redeem my self in the 9th chapter if not the 8th. **

**Apologetically Yours,**

**The Tofuubeaver**


	8. Opening Your Eyes

**A/N: The depression is over! I am now happy again! Partly because of your review and partly because the writer's block has come to an end! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ya gotta love the powers of a carton of Cookies 'n Cream ice cream and an understanding sister to talk to. Thanks Panda! Now on to the fic! HAHA!**

**Disclaimer: I solemnly swear that I don't own Harry or any of his friends…though I wouldn't mind owning some of them…hmmmm…my mind is now wandering…hmmm…**

**CHAPTER EIGHT: Opening Your Eyes**

**

* * *

**Hermione decided that she had had enough of the astronomy tower. She convinced herself that nothing was going to happen if she just sat there and thought. 

She was on one of her walks again. She was determined that the walk would do her good. She was going to visit that place where Ron hurled slugs. She knew that it was all to protect her, but nevertheless she found it pretty hilarious (even though she would never admit that to anyone).

She walked pretty briskly and her thoughts consumed her entirely that she didn't even notice an old man was headed her way, until she bumped into him.

"Well hello there Nadya... aren't at breakfast I see." Said a cheery voice.

"Hello Professor Dumbledore." She nodded. "I wasn't that hungry."

"Don't be so formal with me my dear, after all I am your guardian." He said with a twinkle in his eye.

Hermione had missed his ways. His death was as much a blow to her as it was to everyone that had been there that night. She missed him as she would miss a grandfather.

"Oh you seem to be immersed in your thoughts. Is there something that's bothering you child?" he asked as he led her to a place where they might sit down and converse without unwanted ears listening in on them. He led her to the garden.

"I'm sorry sir, it's just that I seemed to have gotten myself into a mess that I am sure that I may not get out of." She said worriedly. She didn't even mind telling him any of this. She just needed help and Hermione could think of no one else to run to.

"Care to share it my dear?"

"I couldn't possibly burden you with my problems sir…it would be asking too much."

"I wouldn't think about that Nadya. Problems were not meant to be tackled with alone you know." He chuckled.

"Alright." She sighed. She was going to tell him, but she would be careful with her words. "You see sir, ever since I've been back here…well…I've started having nightmares."

"I see…may I ask what they are about?" he politely asked. Dumbledore was never one to pester into matters.

"Of course you may." She replied. She managed to let out a weak smile at his actions. The man always considered others before acting on any impulse. "I always manage to have the same dream. I see Harry's death over and over again and I only manage to wake up when he is dead."

"I take it that this Harry was very important to you?"

"Yes sir, he was." She said grimly. "But lately, my dreams have changed. Last night, I dreamt of running away from someone." She didn't want to reveal the person's name. "He runs after me and I manage to get trapped…with no hopes of escape."

"Do you have any idea who this person might be?" Dumbledore asked worriedly.

"No sir." She lied.

"Well then, the only advice can give you is to be vigilant and keep a close watch on things. Dreams aren't always as meaningless as some claim it to be."

"Thank you sir."

After looking at her still worried face, Dumbledore concluded that dreams weren't her only problem as of now. "I take it that something else is bothering you my dear."

"Well sir, someone may be getting a little too curious about me."

"I believe that that someone would be young Mr. Riddle." He chuckled.

"What makes you think that sir?" she asked him. 'Now I'm convinced that he can read minds.'

"I cannot read minds Nadya, but I know that Mr. Riddle is the sort of person who prefers to be informed. It is just in his nature, besides a mystery like you would be too good for him to pass up."

"What am I going to do sir?"

"I believe you should let things take its course. It is bad to step in nature's way and there for I'd rather you just let things happen."

"But sir, if he finds out anything about my past---"

"Then he will find out…no amount of hiding would stop him form getting the information he wants. Hiding would just make him more interested. The unattainable is always more alluring than the thing that is just staring you at the face." He laughed.

Hermione never got how Dumbledore could always find himself so amusing. But he was right. Tom would be more curious about something that was hidden from him. She would have to consider this. "Thank you sir…I never thought of it that way." She laughed…it was only a small chuckle, but it was the first genuinely happy carefree chuckle that she had made since she got there.

"I'm very glad I could help." He stood up and walked to the corridor leading inside the castle. "Oh and Nadya…" he stopped and turned around to see her still sitting on the bench in the garden.

"Yes sir?" she looked at the old man and asked.

"About that sir thing…call me Uncle Albus outside classroom doors." He smiled.

"Of course Uncle Albus." She smiled and watched the retreating grandfather-like figure as he headed towards the castle.

"And do try to get some breakfast." He said as he walked through the archway.

This just made Hermione smile.

**

* * *

Tom was a little disoriented after his early morning activities. He was usually quite alert in the morning. Sleep meant very little to him, but it was this morning that he truly felt like he had a lack of it. It wasn't very like him at all. **

"You look tired today?" said Malfoy, who was seated right beside him.

"Stating the obvious Malfoy?" he droned sarcastically.

"What happened…late night?" he asked as he took a bite of his sausage.

"Just stayed up a bit and sat in the Slytherin common room… and what is it with the question, what are you my mother?" he asked irritated.

"It's just that you've done that loads of times Tom and I have never seen you look sleepy." He said with no concern at all.

"Ough…I am in no state to ague with you right now. Yes I do feel sleepy…its just that Cavanaugh-----" He was sleepy…there was no other explanation for it. If he weren't in that state, he wouldn't have blurted out her name like that to an extremply persistent person such as Malfoy.

"Cavanaugh." Malfoy smirked. "So she's the reason why you're so tired."

"Oh get your mind out of the gutter Malfoy…it's not what you think. We just talked." He said with increasing irritation.

"Whoa…as in talk civilly? No threats, curses or shouting?" he exclaimed in disbelief. This was certainly a first.

"That is what talking entails Malfoy…." The annoyance was definitely increasing at an alarming rate. 'Is everyone an idiot today or is it just me?'

"It is just that I think you are warming up to her Tom." He said with no interest and returning to his food.

"I am not warming up to her Abraxas…it was just simply the early morning." He said with anger…not annoyance…anger

"Your mouth says one thing…but your actions say another. Don't be ashamed Tom. She does have looks and she is brilliant and----" before Malfoy could finish his sentence, Tom got up and decided to leave for the door.

'Why do people think that I fancy Cavanaugh? First the professors…Slughorn to be particular… second that bloody Levin girl and now that damn Malfoy! Damn irritating Malfoy!' It was not like Tom to loose his composure. It was definitely unlike him in all respects. His thoughts were interrupted by the cause of all his anxiety.

"Riddle…" she nodded.

"Cavanaugh." He curtly nodded in reply.

This was the first time he had seen her back in the Great Hall since the Astronomy Tower incident. He wondered how she could act so…coldly…while he was feeling new things. Like he had said so many times before, this girl was, without a doubt, different from all the others. He walked out of the Great Hall and decided that he would go to his common room. He once again felt the uncanny need to stare at the fire.

**

* * *

**_She was running again. She was running so fast. She had to run. Run away. She couldn't get caught. She just couldn't. _

_Her heart raced and she was short of breath…but she still had to keep running. _

"_You can't run forever." Said a cold voice behind her. It made her run even faster._

_She felt him get closer and closer. He was catching up. She could hear his footsteps on the cold stone floors. He was much faster this time._

'_I can't let him catch me.' _

_She came to a fork on the hall. One way was to the left and the other was to the right. She remembered this way. She went left last time, and it led her to a trap. She was resolved to go right. She didn't want to get caught. Not again._

_She just ran and ran. Her mind was a blank. The only thing that was in her mind now was to get away. _

'_I can't get caught…not again.'_

_She ran and ran. The pang of sweat was now all about her. She was tired. She was just so tired._

_She came upon a door. A very familiar door. It was the door that lead her to the room where she was always caught._

'_No…It can't be.'_

_She ran back to where she came from, but the door always managed to pop up again. _

"_I know you're there." Her assailant said again. He was close now._

_She had no choice. She entered the door and locked it. She leaned her head on the oak door. He was sure not to enter now. She was safe._

"_Think again." Breathed a voice from behind her._

_There was no escape. She was trapped. Hermione turned around and found herself, once again, in the presence of a pair of onyx eyes. _

"_Nadya!" exclaimed a voice._

"Nadya!"

Hermione felt someone calling out a name that wasn't hers.

"Nadya!"

The same person was shaking her, trying to take her from her slumber. But her dream would not let her wake.

"NADYA!"

That did it. She was awake. She opened her eyes to see a pair of blue ones staring right at her.

"Are you all right?" it was Alphard.

"Alphard?" she asked in a groggy sort of way.

"Yeah…it's me. Are you alright?" he had worry in his eyes and she wondered what had gotten him so worried.

"Why are you here?"

"This is the Slytherin common room…so I guess I am entitled to come in anytime I want." He laughed. This was the first time that Hermione had heard any Slytherin laugh. It was definitely different.

Hermione remembered where she was now. She was in the Slytherin common room. She had fallen asleep beside the window.

"You still haven't answered the question…are you ok?"

"Yeah." She answered. "Why…what happened?"

"I entered the common room and you were tossing and turning rather violently. I tried waking you up but it got worse." He explained.

'Was it really that bad?' she thought. None of her nightmares had ever felt that real before.

She just nodded. He smiled, and opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by an unwanted sight.

"What's the matter new girl, having a nightmare?" it was the irritating Katherine again. She was really getting on Hermione's nerves right now.

"I would have thought that the spider would be enough to get the message across, but no…I guess I expected too much from you Katherine. I forgot that you don't have enough brain cells to process that information." She smirked. This made Black laugh.

"You know new girl, you really need to know you're place." She smugly replied.

"Oh then I guess that I should be above you just one more notch."

"Why you little---" Katherine didn't get a chance to finish her sentence because Alphard had cut her off.

"You know Kat-Kat, it isn't really becoming of your breeding to be impolite. What would Aunt Willa say if I told her that you were misbehaving like this?" he smirked.

"Don't you dare blab to my mother about this Alphard! This doesn't concern you!" she threatened him.

"Oh but it does little cousin. You see Nadya here is an acquaintance of mine and I wouldn't want you scaring her off now would I? Besides, I know that Aunt Willa would be furious if she heard that you were giving a bad name to the house of Black." He smirked.

"You're lucky that this one was with you today new girl." She said silently as she walked away from the two.

"You're related to that?" Hermione said with disgust.

"Unfortunately...she's my cousin." He said with a sad look on his face. Apparently he didn't like his cousin as well.

"Sucks to be you." She turned and once again faced the window and watched the clouds in the sky.

"Yeah." He laughed. But Hermione didn't pay heed to that this time. "All purebloods are connected one way or another…wouldn't be surprised if I were somehow related to you."

'He thinks I'm pureblood. Well I don't blame him…being Dumbledore's ward and being a Slytherin would point to that assumption.' She thought. "Trust me…it's not likely."

"Why…you are pureblood aren't you?" he asked skeptically.

'It would be dangerous to admit that I am muggleborn.' "My mother's Bulgarian so I guess that would lessen the possibility."

"Oh…" he said, believing her alibi. "Well that explains the name."

"What do you mean?" she asked, though not looking at him. Her eyes were still fixed to the clouds.

"Nadya…it sounds Bulgarian." He said.

"It means Hope." She said. She looked at him and stood up. "I trust you don't mind but I will take my leave now." Not even waiting for an answer, she stood up and went to her room.

**

* * *

Meanwhile, Tom was watching the scene intently from across the room. When it was over, he saw the figure of Alphard Black walk up to him. **

"I see you were talking to Cavanaugh…trying to be friendly Black?" he asked emotionlessly.

"Well she is one of us now…t doesn't hurt to get to know her." He smirked. "Eavesdropping Tom? Really, I thought that was supposed to be my job."

'As if I don't have enough people smirking at me!'

"I simply overheard." Tom answered. But that wasn't true. The truth was he was doing exactly what Black had accused him off. He was eavesdropping.

"If you say so Tom." Then Black nodded and left the room.

While watching the scene earlier, Tom couldn't help but feel something. It wasn't something he felt often…or at all for that matter. It was like an anger welled up in him and it was all directed to Black. It was as if a possession of his was being taken. It was as if he might do something very drastic if it came to that point. It was jealousy.

'Why am I feeling this all of a sudden?' Tom didn't understand what came over him. He wasn't a fan of emotions. It was not something that he liked indulging in. It was a weakness and Tom was not weak.

'This is all because of that girl…'

But then again, no matter how many times he told himself that he had to stop…he somehow always ends up the same way. With an unfamiliar feeling in him that he still has to discover. But he did know one thing.

'She was right…I am confused.' Then her words entered his mind.

'_Solve it.'_

* * *

**_BLOODY IMPORTANT NEWS: FANFICTION JUST DELETED NEVER WOULD HAVE IMAGINED AND HARRY'S HEART EXTENDED VERSION SO I REALLY WONT BE ABLE TO UPDATE UNTIL MARCH 6, 2006. PLEASE BE PATIENT AND WAIT TILL THEN...I WILL PROBABLY JUST MOVE THOSE TWO FICS TO MY WEBSITE AND YOU COULD JUST REVIEW THERE IF YOU WISH! THANKS FOR THE UNDERSTANDING GUYS! LOVE YA'LL!_**

**A/N: There it is…another installment for Desperation…I must admit that I was touched by your support…during my bad day. Your reviews certainly made me smile! And another thing…I kinda wanna give some teasers so here it is:**

**An encounter with a werewolf…on a full moon no less. An unlikely hero. A plot. A fireplace. A friendship. An anger too great to be quelled. A somewhat surprising turnout of events.**

**There ya have it…teasers…now give me your guesses on who the unlikely hero is and who's friendship it's going to be. **

**Love ya guys and please keep on reviewing! **

**The Tofuubeaver**


	9. Autumn's Gifts

**A/N: Thank you to all who reviewed in the previous chapter and who empathized with me on my suspension…it was really a blow to have your work deleted…thanks for helping me through it! hmmm, but what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger! On to the fic!**

**DISCLAIMER: If this were mine, do you think I'd be writing fan fiction? I didn't think so…now you may read on.**

---

Thinking was something she did very often nowadays. It seemed to occupy a lot of her time. It wasn't the form of thinking that she used to do. No, that kind of thinking was just silly. It now seemed like utter nonsense to worry about deadlines and homework…the kind of thinking that she did now was more reflective.

Hermione now thought about her life. What she had lost, what she had left behind. She often thought of what it would be like if she had stayed. She thought about how differently things might have turned out if only she had not left…if she had accepted their deaths instead of running away from it.

It was cool out in the garden, an optimal place for immersing in deep thought. Autumn brought a lot of changes with it. The leaves were gently falling to the ground and what lay in front of her was a picturesque image of oranges and yellows that blended together in perfect harmony. Up in the sky, the birds seemed to be flying south for the winter ahead. They glided through the sky with their innate grace to head to their destination. The sun was setting on the horizon. The blended colors of the heavens matched the autumn façade perfectly. The castle was so peaceful and quiet. The only sound that could be heard was the rustling of the leaves and the whistling of the gentle breeze. It was all too serene.

It was a Hogsmead weekend and so the castle was left empty, save the first and second years. The silence was deafening, but still it brought a tranquility with it that just relaxed Hermione. But the tranquility didn't last for very long.

She felt someone was watching her. A presence was near her and she could feel it. It unnerved her. She looked around only to find a very familiar boy leaning on the arch way.

"How long have you been there?" she asked as she turned her head back to the scene of the falling leaves.

"Long enough." He said, taking steps toward her.

"Riddle, you strike me as a person who values your privacy, so please respect mine." She said coldly, but pleadingly. She didn't want to be around people that much anymore.

"You know Cavanaugh, it isn't polite to reject company." He retorted as he took a seat beside her. "Besides, I didn't come here just because I enjoy the pleasure of your company, believe me when I say that I don't."

"Then why bother me at all?"

"Professor Dumbledore sent me. He told me to give you this." He took a cloak from his bag and handed it to her. "He said you'd catch your death if you went out without your cloak." He managed to say all of this without an ounce of concern in his voice.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'll take my leave."

He stood up from his place beside her and walked towards the castle. He left her once again with her thoughts.

'He just gets more complex by the minute doesn't he?'

---

Hermione had been sitting there for quite a long time that she hadn't noticed that it was already evening. The stars were now out and the whole garden went dark with only a few torches as a source of light. The moon now shone in all its glory as it seemed like a smudged circle of chalk in a black night sky.

The sun had set hours ago, and still she sat in her solitude. She decided that it was now time to turn in.

She stood up from her position in the solitary bench and headed for the castle. As she walked to the archway, she noticed that a person was leaning on it. It was Levin.

"Where do you think you're going new girl?" she said smugly.

"Well I thought that it would have been obvious that I was headed for the castle Levin, but that level of thinking would be too much for you wouldn't it." She retorted, trying to get passed the irritating girl.

"I don't think so." She blocked her way.

"What the hell are you doing?" she asked and without so much as a warning, the Levin girl threw a sort of powder on her and Hermione's world went dark.

---

Hermione regained consciousness disoriented and weak. She found herself unable to move, but it was not because of the fatigue. Her hands and legs were bound.

'When I find Levin, I am definitely going to hurt her… she better be prepared for immense pain!' she opened her eyes only to see that she was in the middle of a forest…the Forbidden Forest.

She synthesized the data she had and came up with this:

She was alone.

She was wandless.

She was unable to move.

She was in a very scary and potentially dangerous place without anyone knowing of her presence there.

In simple words…

'Damn I'm so screwed.'

'Maybe they'll realize that I'm gone. I'm sure Prof—I mean Uncle Albus would notice that I'm not at the Great Hall, but then again…I haven't been there for quite a while… so I don't think that he wont be sending a search party anytime soon.'

The darkness lessened as the moon revealed itself form behind the clouds. Hermione was now very worried. No one would notice hr absence and she would probably be stuck there until midmorning the next day. She was definitely screwed.

Suddenly, Hermione heard a rustling from the bushes.

'Thank God.' She sighed in relief. "Help…I'm over here!" she shouted.

The entity revealed itself from the clearing and shouting to it was definitely not a good idea.

It was a werewolf.

Its snarling teeth were now exposed and it seemed to be circling its prey, ready to pounce at any moment. Its mouth dripped with saliva at the presence of its next meal.

Hermione tried to wriggle through her bounds but it was utterly useless. She was defenseless against the hunter. She would die.

'At least I'll be able to see you guys again.' That thought lightened Hermione a little. Death would bring her closer to the ones she lost. Ironically, death would give her back her life.

She took a deep breath as she sensed that the werewolf was just about ready to pounce. She prepared for the inevitable. The lycan pounced.

But just as it did, a flash of purple light came at the unfortunate predator and it was thrown back. She looked back to see where the light had come from. Tom was standing between the trees.

"Are you alright?" he said as he walked up to her. He kneeled down beside her and began untying the knots. "What are you even doing here! Don't you know that it's forbidden…hence the name!" he continued as he frantically tried to get her up.

"RIDDLE!" she screamed as she pointed towards the lycan jumping towards Tom.

Tom turned around and saw the sight for himself. "Run back to the castle!" he shouted to her.

"And what leave you here?"

"Just do what you're told for once and GO!" he commanded. The determination in his voice could not be doubted so she reluctantly nodded and left Tom to deal with that creature by himself.

As she ran past the towering trees, she saw flashes of light blaze from behind her. She didn't dare look back, but a dominant part of her was screaming a prayer that Tom would be alright.

She ran and ran until she saw the twinkling lights coming from the castle. It only made her faster and faster until she reached the arch way.

She should have gone directly to the common rooms but, she just paced there and waited for any sign of Tom.

"Oh God let him be fine!" she whispered.

She couldn't sit down…she just couldn't. She knew that deep in her, she should be happy that Tom might lose his life that night. It would finish her job for her. She wouldn't have to get rid of Tom herself. If Tom died that night, she would be able to go back to her home. She would be able to see them again…to see him again. But even though her mind was shouting this, her heart's prayer was louder and it was pleading with the heavens that Tom would be alright.

In the midst of all her panic, she saw a figure come out of the clearing. It was Tom. He looked disheveled, but at least he was fine.

He walked up to her. "Why are you still here?" he asked, but before she could reply, he took her hand and began leading her through the corridors. "You can't go back to the common rooms or Mrs. Norris will kill you."

'The cat?' "Who's Mrs. Norris and where are you taking me?" she asked as she got dragged off passage after passage. She felt like she had gone through the same way before, but was too flustered to remember.

"Mrs. Norris is the caretaker…and I'm taking you to the Head's Dormitory. It's closer so you have less chances of getting caught."

"What about you…your walking around after hours as well so you'd get into the same amount of trouble." She said forgetting her words.

"You forget. I have every right to be up after hours since I'm Head Boy." They stopped in front of a massive portrait of a very old wizard who seemed to have a slight resemblance to Tom. From what she could gather, this was Salazar Slytherin himself. "Dilim."

The portrait door swung open and it revealed a very luxurious common room. It was the room where she had had her first Knights meeting.

"Sit down Cavanaugh. You can stay here till morning." He said as he sat in front of the fire.

She took the seat opposite him and stared into the fire with him. "How did you know where I was?"

"I was doing my rounds and I heard someone shout from the Forbidden Forest. I decided to check it out since it is my duty to learn who's out of bed at these hours." He said emotionlessly. Tom kept his eyes to the fire, remembering the time when they betrayed his emotions to her. It wouldn't happen again.

"I don't understand…what was that out there?" she said. Of course she knew what that was, but she had to act as if it was out of her knowledge.

"Remember me telling you of Greyback?" she nodded him affirmation, "Well it is a full moon tonight." He could see that she understood immediately. "But why were you there in the first place?" he now turned the tables.

"The last thing I remember was that I was going back to the castle when Levin---"

"Ah, Levin…I should have known that she would do something like this." He said darkly. Anger now welled up inside of him and it would not be quelled easily. "I promise you that she will pay."

Hermione was surprised at his reactions. She didn't expect him to care…she didn't expect anything of him. She turned to him and saw that blood was seeping through his robes and was dripping on the armrest. "What the hell happened to you?" she asked as she stood up and walked to him.

"Leave it." He said coldly. She lifted the sleeves of his robes only to reveal a very serious gash there stretching from his wrist to his elbow.

"Riddle you idiot!" she tried to finger it.

"Ahhh! I said leave it!" he reprimanded her, quickly taking back his arm from her grasp.

"I can't very well leave it. You're bleeding! Did you get bitten?" She asked worriedly.

"No, it just scratched me." It was now his turn to be surprised by her actions. He didn't expect her to fuss all over him like this. No one had ever done that. It was so new to him.

"Well I can't very well heal you without my wand. I'll have to do it the muggle way." She stood up and went to the bathroom. She came out with a bowl of hot tap water and kneeled down beside him.

She ripped her robes, dipped it in the water and dabbed it on his wound.

He winced at the contact of the water. Hermione laughed.

"What's so funny?" he eyed her as if she was raving mad.

"Harry used to scream to high heavens whenever I cleaned his wounds the muggle way." She smiled.

"Harry…you talk about him a lot." He said, now looking at her.

"Do I?" she said thoughtfully. "I guess its second nature. He was my best friend." She mused…talking more to herself than to Tom.

"Accident prone?"

"What?" she snapped from her train of thought, returning to her task of cleaning his wounds.

"This Harry…you implied that you clean his wounds. Is he accident prone?"

"No. He was helping out in the war. Whenever he came back, he would always be covered in blood and gashes. I often healed them for him since he didn't want to go to the nurse."

"Back at the tower, you suggested that he was about our age? How did he come to fight against Grindewald's men?"

"Age didn't exactly stop him from fighting. It seemed like he was born to do it." She said with a sense of pride.

"You mentioned that he died."

"Yes. He did. Died fighting during the attack on our school." She said grimly. Harry had died during the attack on Hogwarts. She remembered the dagger thrust through his heart.

She stopped cleaning the cut and ripped her robes again. She took the newly formed piece and bandaged Tom's injury. "There…all done."

"You didn't have to do that." He told her.

"I wanted to. It was the least I could do after the Forbidden Forest incident." She said as she took her seat back on the chair opposite his.

They were silent for a while. Each having a million questions to ask, but not knowing what to say to the other. Finally Tom broke the silence.

"When I saw you in the forest, Greyback was about to pounce at you. He was about to kill you…but you didn't even look scared. Why?" he asked.

"Death would give me back my life." She said simply, yet grimly.

"What do you mean?"

"It is in death that I will regain all that I had lost. I'd get to see my parents again, my friends. I would get back all that I had lost that night." She turned her head from his face to her lap.

"So you would have preferred that I hadn't found you?" It was more of a statement rather than a question.

"I wouldn't have preferred it…but I would have been ready to accept it." She said, her eyes still transfixed upon her lap.

"Death is not a solution. It is never a solution. You can always change things while you're still alive. You must resist it as long as possible"

"No Tom. There are things worse than death." She stated, as she raised her head and looked towards him.

"What could possibly be more horrible than ceasing to exist." As he returned her glance.

"You may not understand it now…heck, you may never do…but death doesn't mean ceasing to exist. Death isn't an ultimate evil. It can bring about good things. In a way, death can be a form of immortality. The legacy that you leave behind will be as if you were preserved to last through the ages. In death, you get to live forever." She said as she stared into his eyes once more, but now she saw something that she couldn't read. She had never before seen this in the eyes of Tom Riddle nor in Lord Voldemort.

"But what is the use of being able to live forever if you can't actually… live?" he asked…somewhat desperate for an answer.

"I told you that you may not understand this now…maybe someday. You don't have to understand anything and everything right now Riddle. Believe me, I know." She stood up and walked to the portrait door.

"Where are you going? Mrs. Norris is going to find you." He said.

"I'll take my chances." She opened the door. She stepped out of the portrait, and he watched her as she did.

But before she closed it, Hermione popped her head inside. "Thank you Riddle."

He didn't know what to say. She had never thanked him before. It was a first. He couldn't respond. He just stared at her.

"Good Night Riddle." She said as she finally closed the portrait door, leaving an even more confused boy…more confused than when he walked in.

---

It was now morning and Hermione was out to go to the kitchens. She had long ago decided that she would go there for her dietary needs (a/n: how do you think she ate when she wasn't going to the Great Hall during the part of her depression. LOL!)

She walked along the many hallways, but eventually bumped into her favorite 'Uncle'.

"Nadya, how nice to see you." He said as he gave her a hug.

"I've been fine Prof---I mean Uncle Albus." She laughed. Since their little talk, she had been doing that a lot more. "Sorry old habits die hard." Slightly embarrassed that she had almost called him Professor again.

"Quite understandable my dear." He smiled.

"Oh…I forgot to thank you for the cloak the other day. Really should have brought one myself." She explained.

"I don't think I follow." He looked confused.

"Well, don't you remember the cloak that you had someone give to me because you said that I would catch my death if I stayed out there without one?" she explained further. 'Dumbledore must really be old.'

"I assure you my dear that I may not be as young as I used to be, but I believe I still have the use of my memory." He chuckled. "I don't remember sending you a cloak…although if I had known that you had been staying outside without one, I would have probably done just as you said." He smiled. "This person who gave you the cloak must care for your wellbeing though." He bid his farewell and went off on his merry way.

Instead of the kitchens, she decided to just go to the garden instead. The old professor had just given her a lot to think about.

Hermione went to her usual spot in the solitary bench, sat and thought about what she just heard.

Dumbledore's words hit Hermione like a rock.

_This person who gave you the cloak must care for your wellbeing though._

It couldn't be. Riddle…Tom Riddle cared for her well being? How could that be? She couldn't digest what the bearded man just said.

Tom cared for her?

Could that even be possible?

"Out again Cavanaugh?" asked a very familiar voice.

"Hello again Riddle." She replied.

"Why do you find it so appealing to be out all alone?" he asked as he stood beside her.

"Why do you?" she retorted, this time turning around to look at him. "I thanked my Uncle today for the cloak. He didn't seem to remember."

Tom looked shocked. He now knew that he had been found out. "Do you mind if I sat down?" he asked softly. This was the first time that he had spoken softly in his entire life.

"Not at all." She softly smiled at him. Hermione moved to one side and gave room for Tom to sit.

Tom was surprised for a while, but later on returned her smile. This was a rare sight to see, Tom's smile. It was rare but wonderful at the same time. He took the seat beside her, staying close but at the same time maintaining a distance.

The falling leaves gently cascaded on the grass below. The clouds rolled by as the sun shone on. The breeze sang a peaceful lullaby that rocked the earth softly to serene rest. Tom and Hermione both sat there for a long time, both eyes looking forward to the tranquil scene before them. Neither spoke a word, silence was maintained. They didn't need to speak; the other's presence was more than enough. It was comforting. It was safe. Both of them hadn't felt that kind of security in a long time. It was like home. It was like Hermione had found home again.

Inside the castle and old man looked outside his window. He looked towards the garden where a boy and a girl…no, a man and a woman sat down in stillness. He couldn't help but smile at the sight. He stepped back from his window in the knowledge that something had been formed that day.

An unspoken friendship was created.

Autumn brought a lot of changes with it.

**A/N: My suspension is over and I am now free to update! Yay for me! I hoped you like the chapter…something has happened; an unspoken friendship was forged from the fires of hate! HA! I wanted to make this one long, so I hope you don't find it length challenged. **

**Please review oh dear little readers! And forgive me if the chappie is a little flustered, I'm kinda of a scatter brain today.**

**Oreos to the person who finds out what movie inspired this chapter…guess…come on I'm sure you know!**

**Oreos to the person who can find out what Dilim means…hint, it was described in a previous chapter.**

**Well that's all for now…I have to get working on my other fic! TATA!**

**TTFN**

**The Tofuubeaver ()! **


	10. Worth More Than A Thousand Words

**Disclaimer: If this were mine…then you wouldn't be seeing a disclaimer now would you!**

---

Their voices were so loud.

I swear that if a silencing charm wasn't on that room, the entirety of Hogwarts would have been aware that Tom Riddle and Nadya Cavanaugh were having another one of their infamous rows.

"Oh will you just mind your own business Riddle!" she fumed.

"Only if you'll deflate your oversized ego for once and listen to reason before you act so impulsively!" he snapped back.

"Oh your one to talk about oversized egos…it does make sense since you have one!"

It was an endless cycle of taunts, swearing and insults. It wasn't easy to get either of them angry…but they just happen to bring it out of another.

"Oh I don't care what you say Riddle!" she told him. Nadya was the only one who didn't cower at the very presence of the ebony eyed Slytherin.

"Oh come off it Cavanaugh! Why don't you just shut up and do as you're told for once…or would that be too much asking from you!"

They had been going at it for about an hour now, but neither seemed to tire. Neither Tom nor Nadya had been known to back down from a fight.

"You are not right all the time Riddle! Did you ever consider that?"

"But I am right most of the time, did _you_ ever consider that?"

This was by far the longest row they had ever had. It happened often these days…quite often in fact. It was definitely a common occurrence that had began when Nadya first arrived, but ever since that full moon two months ago, the topics had certainly changed.

"Cavanaugh, you didn't eat breakfast this morning and now you're telling me that you're skipping lunch! How in the heck do you expect to go to your classes with out a bite to eat? What would the Professor think?"

"Don't you dare bring my uncle into this Riddle and why the hell should I even care! I don't owe you an explanation for everything I do!"

"Look, I'm going to go ahead and I'm expecting that you will follow. Either you come down to the Great Hall willingly or I swear I will drag you there myself!" he warned her, and started walking towards the door that lead to the Slytherin common room.

"Oh just go to hell Riddle!" she said to his back.

"Ladies first." He snapped, in a dual meaning sort of way, as he opened the door and allowed her to pass first.

The two walked out of that room fuming at each other, leaving the lounging Slytherins in utter curiosity of what just happened inside that remote room. Tom went directly towards the portrait door, whilst Nadya took a seat in front of the fire.

'What the hell is she trying to do to herself? Does she think that I'm blind? She's as thin as a match stick! Anyone with eyes can see that! Ough! That Cavanaugh is going to be the death of me!'

Tom irritably walked through the halls towards the Great Hall. Ever since the full moon two months ago, he showed more worry towards her well being. He now cared whether or not she had eaten full meals. He now became irritated if she went outside without taking a cloak with her. And it aggravated him to find out that she hadn't been sleeping well.

'I'm a nervous wreck.'

This never happened to Tom. He never cared about other people. He couldn't care less about how other people are anorexic or hypothermic or insomniac. But then again…Cavanaugh was different. She brought it out of him. She was the only person he had ever worried about. He didn't even know why…he was still trying to figure that part out. It was all too complicated. And at this rate, Tom grew to hate complexity with each passing day.

He took angry strides towards the Great Hall. He hated the way that Nadya could make him feel so…so…unglued. Oh how he loathed feeling a loss of control, especially on himself.

But, in the middle of his mental rantings, he realized that he had forgotten his bag in the common rooms. Lessons came immediately after lunch so he would need to bring his bag with him in order to make it to lessons on time.

He gave a very frustrated grunt and turned back towards the Slytherin common rooms.

He didn't want to go back in there, not after his little episode with Nadya. No. He couldn't go back there. She would just think that he was going to apologize or something, and he really wasn't going to do that.

'Over my dead body.'

No. Tom Riddle never apologized to anybody…not even to Nadya.

He was now in front to the common rooms. All he needed do was to say the password, go in, get his bag and get out without so much as a word. It was easy enough. Cavanaugh needn't see him. Surely his Slytherin abilities allowed him to do that.

'Besides, why do I even care what Cavanaugh thinks! It doesn't matter what she thinks!'

Since when did he start talking to himself? He pushed his thoughts to the back of his mind, thinking that there would be a more appropriate time to think about her and focused all his attention on getting his bag.

"Darkness." He murmured, and the portrait swung open. What lay inside was a sight that made Tom's blood boil with fury.

---

"New girl." Hermione could recognize that evil sound anywhere. It was a sound that she had grown to hate ever since she first heard it.

"Levin." She replied, not even looking behind her to confirm her theories.

"Well, all alone new girl…no Tom to protect you now." She said with an irritating cackle.

"Oh sod off Levin, just because Riddle told you off when he retrieved my wand…it doesn't mean that I can't tell you off myself." She threatened her.

"Then why send him off to do the dirty work for you then? Couldn't handle doing anything yourself?" she laughed once more. This Levin girl was really starting to get on her nerves. "And besides, Tom probably just did that so that I wouldn't get in trouble with the teachers when they find out that I disarmed you." Katherine said with utter conviction.

"And the delusions just get worse don't they! Let me get a few things clear Levin. One, Riddle does NOT I repeat NOT like you in any way, shape or form. Two, Riddle retrieved my wand WITHOUT MY KNOWLEDGE you idiotic tart. Finally, if I had had the chance, I would have gone after you myself…but Riddle beat me to it." She said standing up and facing the foolish girl.

Katherine took steps towards Hermione, and she bore a murderous glint in her eyes. "How dare you speak to me like that? You have absolutely no right nor authority to speak to me like that." Just then, Levin raised her hand and slapped Hermione across the face.

"LEVIN!" shouted a thunderous, ominous voice.

Hermione turned to the portrait door only to see a very furious Tom Riddle standing at the threshold. Tom held a vicious look in his eyes, she could see it despite the distance…and she could see that all the hate and malice was directed towards a very unfortunate Katherine Levin.

"Oh hello Tom, come to see the downfall of the new girl haven't you?" she laughed as she smiled at the now even more livid Tom.

"Step away from her now Levin." He threatened the girl dangerously. No one had ever seen Tom this enraged. All the Slytherins in the common room automatically backed off, not wanting to get in the way of his anger.

"But Tom, the fun's just started." She really didn't know when to shut up didn't she.

"I said BACK. OFF. NOW!" that last word sent shivers down everyone's spine. His voice instilled a sort of cold fear in all that could have heard it. It was unnerving.

"Oh silly me! I've been hogging all the vengeance for the new girl all for myself. You should have told me that you wanted part of the action Tom." She walked towards him, with a smile on her face.

"Levin, when will you ever get the hint that I don't like you! You are just a stuck up snob with nothing to do but throw yourself on unsuspecting students such as myself! I have no intention in participating in your vendetta on Cavanaugh here, which I might remind you only started because she refused to join your ranks. Now, I hate repeating myself, since I have already told you this when I retrieved her wand…but since you can't drive it through your thick head, I think I'll be willing to make an exception. STAY. THE. HELL. AWAY. FROM. HER!" he finished. No one would deny the fact that Tom made himself perfectly clear that he hated this Levin's very presence.

"Why do you care about her so much? She's just a friendless, cold, snobbish bitch that has no family and was forced on Dumbledore since none of her relatives were willing to take her! She's an ORPHAN…UNLOVED…AND UNWANTED!" she screamed at Tom.

That had done it. Her words stung to Hermione like venom. Tom turned to her to see that she was as white as a sheet. There was no trace of blood on her face. It held no emotion. No sign of anger no sorrow. It was utterly blank. She just turned her back on them.

Hermione didn't see Tom turn his head to Levin yet again. She didn't see the look on Levin's face as she was smiling at the fact that she had struck the most sensitive nerve in Hermione's entire body. Katherine was in utter bliss. And the darkest look could be seen in Tom's eyes.

She didn't see any of this, as she had gone upstairs to her room and quietly shut the door behind her.

---

"You should learn when to shut the hell up Levin." He spoke in a silent yet terrifying tone. He extracted his wand from his pockets and took small, but menacingly frightening strides towards her. No one had ever seen him in such a fury.

He had her backed up against a wall, the tip of his wand in deep contact with her neck. Levin now paled with fear. She now had a first hand taste on what Tom Riddle was like when you pissed him off.

Tom now opened his mouth to utter a spell, but was suddenly interrupted by a familiar voice.

"Put your wand down Tom." said Alphard cautiously to him. Black walked to the infuriated Riddle and slowly lowered his wand. "She's not worth it."

"But you heard the things she said." Tom said in the same low and dangerous voice.

"Don't worry Tom. Dolohov and I will handle this one. Go up to Nadya. She didn't look to well when she left."

Nadya. Tom had forgotten the way her face went white right after Levin's outburst. He had forgotten how she fell emotionless as she climbed the stairs to her room. He was just filled with pure anger that he forgot.

"Show her no mercy." Tom turned darkly to Alphard and instructed him.

"Don't worry Tom…Kat-Kat here will get her just desserts." Alphard said in a low voice.

Tom turned around and left the lunatic in the hands of Black and Dolohov. He knew that they were more than capable of taking care of the wench.

He slowly climbed up the stairs and stopped at Nadya's room. He gave a soft knock on the door, but no one answered.

He knocked again and got the same reply of silence. Tom turned the knob to see that it remained unlocked.

He cautiously opened the door to see that she was positioned on a chair beside her window. There was no contrast between the paleness of her complexion and the immaculate white of the snow falling outside her window. Nadya held a small wooden box with lilacs carved all over it. It was the same box that he had seen that night they spoke by the fire. She fingered the unopened box dearly and lovingly as silent tears fell from her eyes.

He watched her in silence. This was not something he had seen before. The night in the astronomy tower was nothing compared to what he was seeing at that very moment.

In the astronomy tower, the sorrow radiated off her. You could feel her sadness and her remorse. You could see the suffering through her eyes and by the way that her tears had brought her shaking. She was different right now.

This sight worried him. She just sat there emotionless like a statue. She was utterly pale and seemed clammy. The only signs of life that showed were the tender movements of her hand across the surface of the lilac box and the silent tears that came flowing through her brown eyes. He didn't know what she was feeling. She just looked numb.

"Cavanaugh?" he asked as he sat himself down on her bed.

She remained silent.

"Are you alright Cavanaugh?" he asked with genuine concern.

Still she remained silent.

"Levin is paying as we speak." No change at all.

"I'm not used to seeing you like this you know." He confessed. "I guess that we've had too many rows that I've forgotten how you are when you're silent."

He didn't like seeing her like this. It was as if he was talking to thin air.

"You shouldn't care about what Levin says. She's just a brat who can't hold her tongue."

Silence.

"Did you know that I'm an orphan too? Yeah…my mother died giving birth to me and my father couldn't care less with what happens to me so I just got stuck in an orphanage. Damn it was hell there. When I first showed signs of magic, the Muggles there would punish me as if it were evil. They'd whip me until I apologized for what I had no control over. I was so glad when Dumbledore told me that I was a wizard. I'd accept anything that included me getting out of that place. I didn't even question or doubt him. I was just so happy that I was getting out. I still have to go there during summers, but it's ok now that I know that I have a Hogwarts to come home to." He couldn't stand the silence. Nadya's expression named unchanged, so he continued to talk.

"When I first came to Hogwarts, I didn't know what to think. Everything was so new to me and it gave me a sense of belonging. I was sorted into Slytherin faster than anybody else. It was like the hat didn't even need to think on it. I belonged in Slytherin. But as soon as the other students found out that I was half-blood…yes I am half-blood…they quickly ostracized me. They looked at me as if I were something dirty…something contaminated." He had a look of anger in is face again, but quickly relaxed at his next memory. "It was Black who first approached me. He fended them off, and since he was a Black…he already had automatic respect." He had never told anyone this, but he felt the need and want to tell her.

"His sources had told him that I was an orphan, and being one himself…he took it upon himself to teach me the ropes of Slytherin house, since his family had been there for years. Being cold came naturally to me. I was a quick study. I spent years building the walls around me. Years trying to earn the reputation, the respect I have now…so don't be worried that there is still that stupid girl who disrespects you. A phoenix rises from the ashes of its destruction…and so will you. Levin will learn to fear and respect you soon enough. I promise you that after today, she would not dare talk about you like that ever again." He adamantly promised.

"But what she said was true." Nadya finally spoke. It surprised him, but he didn't show it. Her voice was hoarse and ragged from the tears.

"No it is not." He speedily reassured her.

"Yes it is. I am alone. I should have been dead along with them."

"Don't say that. Death never brought anyone any good."

"But it would have. I was a coward. I ran away from death instead of accepting it. I came here instead of facing what is inevitable." She said with her voice shaking, but still not in eye contact with him.

"What you did was right Cavanaugh. It was self preservation. You did what you needed to do to survive. I would have done exactly the same thing." He admitted.

"No you wouldn't have! Admit it! You would have fought to your grave instead of running away from the death that followed you!" she said, now looking him in the eye.

"No I wouldn't have. There is nothing more terrible on this earth than to be dead. I told you before that it should be avoided at all costs." He said quietly.

"And I have told you before that there are worse things in life than death. Sometimes it's worse being the one who survives rather than being the one who dies." She murmured.

Tom didn't want to discuss death. He didn't want to talk about it. The fact was that, death was Tom Riddle's only and greatest fear. He quickly looked for a way to change the subject. That way came in the form of a picture.

---

Hermione was just staring into space again, with the box that contained Harry's golden heart kept safe within her grasp. It gave her comfort. It gave her peace.

The tears continued to stream down her eyes as the minutes passed. It was then that she noticed that a certain picture had caught Tom's eye. It was the only picture that she had brought with her to the past.

"That's them." She said to herself, more than to him. She heard Tom pick the frame up as he stared into the picture. It was a muggle picture with all of them there. She knew that photograph by heart already.

It was a picture taken before the start of seventh year. It was the happiest moment that they ever had together. It was the last summer they spent at the Burrow before the start of the Final Battle.

On the left side of the picture, two boys could be seen playing wizard's chess. Ron had goofy smile on his face that he always had when he knew that he was winning and Draco had that smirk he always put on whenever he knew something that the other one didn't.

After betraying his family, Draco was disowned by his mother and banished from Malfoy Manor. He was cast out with nowhere to go. That was when the Weasleys came into the picture. They offered him a place to stay. Since he was practically homeless, he begrudgingly agreed. He later on grew to love Mrs. Weasley as his own mother, and she loved him as one of her sons. Draco treated the twins as his very own brothers. They taught him every one of their tricks. He had a knack for mischief that Ron simply didn't have. He carried on their legacy of "pranksterhood". Though it was still evident that he still didn't like Ron's guts…a form of fraternal bond was formed between them that no row could dissolve.

In the center of the picture you could spot Ginny trying to coach Draco into beating Ron. She pointed out every weakness on Ron's side of the board in hopes that somebody could finally bring Ron down from his chess throne.

Ginny and Draco had started a romance that summer. It wasn't one of those cliché affairs where Ginny would turn Draco from his pratty ways and turn him into a perfect gentleman. No. Draco was still a prat and Ginny loved him for that. It was that insufferable part of Draco that actually drew her to him. On the other hand, Draco loved Ginny for her spunky ways. She was the only person, other than Hermione, who could insult him to the very core of his being. Ginny exploited the ferret situation to the best of her capabilities up to the point that "ferret" became her pet name for him. Draco loved the fact that Ginny always dragged him down to earth when his head accommodated too much helium.

Last, but not the least was the far right side of the picture. On that end lay an image of a young woman and a young man. The young man, with his eyes closed in slumber, sat on the grass with his back against a great oak tree and his legs outstretched in all their length. The young woman lay on his lap as her chest fell up and down in the rhythm of undisturbed sleep.

Harry and Hermione had fallen asleep that afternoon after talking all about the upcoming year. Harry was actually about to ask Hermione something, when he had realized that she had just fallen asleep. She remembered him putting his hands in his pockets often that afternoon as if he was fingering something inside of it. He had been so nervous that day because of what he was going to ask her… all those fears melted as he saw her angelic face in peaceful slumber. He then decided that he would take a nap as well. He'd just ask her on the first day of school.

But where was Neville in all of this? Neville was the one that Hermione remembered most in this picture, though he isn't seen in it. Neville was the one who took the picture. He was the one who gave it to her.

Neville had visited that day with his grandmother to thank everybody for the presents that they'd given him for his birthday. While Gran Longbottom and Mrs. Weasley talked inside the house, Neville came to join the rest of them outside. He saw the scene in the Weasley garden and was taken with it. He immediately took the muggle camera that Hermione had given him and took a snap shot of the entire thing. He declared that it was too perfect not to be immortalized.

Hermione's tears increased as she reminisced on that one day, that one summer.

"Is that Harry?" Riddle finally spoke. It wasn't as long a pause as could be expected. It only lapsed less than a minute…but the silence was still uncomfortable.

"Yes that's Harry." She replied, not even looking at which boy Riddle pointed to.

"You didn't even look."

"That bespectacled boy with the haphazard hair leaning on the oak tree is Harry." She answered, fully aware that it was that boy who struck Tom's curiosity.

"Do you miss him?"

"Everyday." She said weakly.

"You loved him didn't you." Said Tom as more of a statement rather than a question.

"I did. But it's no use because he's gone now…" she said as she cried. "They're all gone now, six feet below the ground. I'll never see them again. I'm alone." She bowed down her head and started to cry even harder.

"Not anymore." He said as wiped her tears from her eyes and he put his hand over hers.

His actions always surprised her. He was there when you least expected him. She never expected Tom to be the one comforting her amidst her sorrow. She never imagined that he would be the one wiping her tears as she cried. She never expected him to be the one who placed his hand on hers as a source of comfort and reassurance. She never expected any of this…and yet, there he was. He sat with her through her deepest hour and promised her that everything would be alright. The strange thing was that she believed him. She believed every word.

She made no attempts to discourage him, nor did she violently pull it away. She just let it stay there. A kind comforting hand that guaranteed her that she was no longer alone.

It was then that she finally let go of her little lilac box and put her other hand on top of his.

---

**A/N: that's it…another chappie down. I hope you guys all got the last line…if you didn't please read it again! It's very important in the developments to come!**

**Now for the answers: **

_**What movie inspired the previous chapter? **_

_**Answer: Beauty and the Beast. It's the part when Beast fends off the wolves in the forest and Belle cleans his wounds afterwards!**_

_**What is the meaning of Dilim?**_

_**Answer: Dilim is the Tagalog word for darkness! Mabuhay Philippines!**_

**I thank all that reviewed last chappie! You know who you guys are and all of you know that I owe you guys cookies…may it be oreos or chocolate chip or what not(its really your choice!).**

**The suspense must be killing you now! What will happen to Tom and Hermione/Nadya? Are they now going to go towards the path of becoming a couple or just plain friends (for the meanwhile)? Will Tom ever realize what his feelings mean? Will that bitch Kat-Kat ever get the message? Will anyone prove a conflict for the budding couple? What will Hermione do with the feelings now growing inside of her…if there are any!**

**Haha! I will now go in risk of getting killed by curious readers! Review you guys! Love ya'll!**

**TTFN!**

**The Tofuubeaver**


	11. IMPORTANT NOTE

Hey there guys!

I am so happy to get so many reviews! I am so glad that you guys still read even though I hardly had the time to update…I am so sorry about that. Here's why…I have been training for a military competition (since I take military training as an extra curricular activity) so I hardly had the time to write…so sorry…but guess what…we won the championship for the medics category (that's what I joined in!) so I am happy!

Adding to my list of stress inducers is the fact that I have to submit two theses in the span of the following weeks…plus I have to make my own magazine layout for my English class…so wont be able to update till March 31…but that will be an UPDATE BONANZA! 2 chapters per story and I have two ongoing stories so that'll be 4 chapters in one day! You gotta love me after that! So please be patient for the following dates…meanwhile please indulge in the new teasers on my home page (found in my profile) wherein I have also put a new page…this new page contains all the graphics I have made in Adobe Photoshop…please visit it and post your comments on my guestbook! Thank you!

The Tofuubeaver!


	12. If I Could

"Hello young lovers!"

"Black, this is a library so you are supposed to be quiet." Murmured Tom, without taking his eyes off his book.

"For once I agree with Riddle." Said Nadya in a cold, uninterested tone.

"Oh look at the sweet couple. It's like you have one mind now don't you." Alphard exclaimed in mock adoration for the sight before him. Tom and Nadya were at Tom's table in the library. They were seated at opposite sides of the table as they read their respective books.

"Is it just me or are you two sitting at opposite sides of an enormous table."

"Maximum distance. No need for any form of contact at all." Mumbled Nadya as she continued reading her book.

"But why would you want that? You two look so sweet together." Alphard mused.

"Oh get over it Alphard. You know that I despise Riddle and have no intentions whatsoever of being involved with him."

"The feeling is mutual, I assure you." Tom hastily added.

"You two are no fun at all." Alphard pouted. "So how has life been treating you…personally I feel amazing bu---" before he could finish his sentence, a grumble could be heard from the left side of the table. "Am I boring either of you?"

"He really hasn't heard the art of putting his foot in his mouth has he?" Nadya droned in annoyance.

"Unfortunately, Black here isn't acquainted with the concept of silence." Tom answered in the same annoyed tone.

"Oh come on you two…you talk about me as if I wasn't here."

"What are you doing here Alphard? Can't you go be boisterous somewhere else…"said Nadya irritably.

"Boisterous, moi?"

"Yes Black. And you would do us all a favor if you left now." Tom was not the most pleasant person this morning.

"But I just came here to inform you that my dear cousin Kat-Kat has been taken care of." He smirked. That little tidbit of information drew Tom's attention.

"Is that so?" he asked with a smirk of his own.

"Umhum…let's just say that she wouldn't be bothering Nadya anytime soon."

"What did you do to her?" Even though Nadya hated the girl with passion, she didn't want to know that Levin had been subjected into any serious danger.

"Well, what we did is not for young ladies such as yourself to hear…" but Alphard soon caught on to her distress, however miniscule it was. "…but never fear, she has all of her limbs accounted for and she wasn't put in any serious harm. We just mildly threatened her, as we owled my Aunt Willa and told her about her daughter's heinous behavior. She just owled me back this morning saying that she had just cut Kat-Kat's allowance. Auntie said that there was no doubt in her mind on why I had always been her favorite nephew."

"Cut back her allowance? That's all?" said Tom somewhat disbelievingly. This was not how he imagined his revenge to be.

"Tom, don't be mistaken. You have no idea how much torture that is for Kat-Kat. If you were an extremely spoiled and wealthy brat…you would need at least 100 galleons in your possession just to get you by the day. Now see here, Kat-Kat is about to have 0 galleons plus the wrath of my Aunt which she will have to come home to in the near future. Now…I could have been more creative and have given Dolohov a free hand in his artistry, but I fear that that would have earned us a one way ticket out of Hogwarts. Do you understand my logic?"

"Well you could have used Dolohov's methods and have gotten away with it." Tom grumbled. 'I should have done it myself.'

"No. I think what Alphard did was perfect." Smirked Nadya as she closed her book.

"I don't see how that small thing could have been perfect." Replied Tom snidely.

"Don't you see? We're using Levin's own fears against her. Given your reputations, Levin would think that the allowance thing is just the tip of an enormous iceberg. She'll expect that we would have more in store for her when we actually have none. That way she'll be so paranoid that she'll keep thinking that we have some appalling torture just waiting for the right time to hatch. She'll always sleep with one eye open now. It's all psychological."

"That is pure and utter genius! Nadya, I didn't even think of it that way!" exclaimed Alphard. "You are too devious for words."

"Good work." Tom nodded to Nadya as he went back to his book. Inside, he really felt as amazed and impressed as Alphard. I mean, he didn't even think of using Levin's own mind against her. He only thought of the physical pain that he could inflict on the annoyance. He never even considered the emotional trauma that could impose upon her. Nadya was indeed the most manipulative woman that he had ever known.

But, he couldn't show all that emotion. He was Tom Riddle…cold and heartless…definitely hard to impress.

"Thank you, both of you. Now if you'll excuse me…" she stood up and collected her things.

"Where are you going?" asked Tom, with a small amount of concern.

"I'll continue my reading in the garden. It's quiet…" she shot a glare at Alphard. "…there. Don't worry Riddle, I have a cloak."

"Nonetheless, it's snowing outside so you shouldn't be going out there."

"I'm used to the cold. I don't care." She turned around and headed for the exit.

'But I do.'

---

Hermione didn't go to the garden to read. She didn't come there to watch the scenery either. Hell, she wasn't even reading in the library earlier. She just wanted to think. Too much had happened all too fast.

Earlier in the library, she was just spent the time quietly thinking. Alphard ruined all that when he arrived. She tried to continue, but it was all too distracting. She needed to get away, so she came to the garden.

The temperature was frighteningly cold…but she didn't care. Somehow she felt numb now. It was like all her pain had numbed her entire being.

Someone once said that time heals all wounds, that given time, a broken heart would mend.

Whoever said those words lied.

Her heart was still as broken as when she saw the knife pierce his heart. It was still as broken as the second that she witnessed the last breath leave his body. Her heart wasn't the only thing broken though…she was broken as well.

"_Hermione?"_

_Harry entered the common room to see that the one he loved so dearly had tears in her eyes. He couldn't, for the life of him, understand why she was crying. He hated seeing her sad. It broke him in two._

"_Harry?" she turned around and saw him standing there…watching her. _

"_What's wrong…" he said as he sat down beside her and enveloped her small frame in his arms. He gently cooed soothing sounds to her as he hummed a very familiar tune to Hermione. This was the song that he always hummed whenever he comforted her. Hermione had come to rely on his humming during times of despair._

"_I can't …" she couldn't finish her sentences…she was just crying so hard. She buried her head in Harry's chest and just let her tears flow._

_This was wrenching Harry's heart. He couldn't bear to see her so sad. If he could take away all her pain, he would do so gladly, but the thing is pain was a personal thing. It could not be shared nor taken away. He knew this fact all too well._

_Harry felt helpless as he felt his clothes dampen with her tears. He didn't know what to do. What was hurting her? What could he do? There was nothing he could do. Al he could really do was just hold her and hum a sweet melody to ease her pain…nothing more…nothing less._

_If I could_

_I'd take away your pain tonight_

_If I could_

_I'd gladly suffer just to see you smile_

_I'd wipe away your tears _

_I'd hold you tight and calm your fears_

_If I could_

_Only if I could_

_It was a simple melody, but it meant the world to Hermione. _

_She just stayed there and sobbed as she continued to listen to her beloved's words of comfort._

Harry was once the only person who could save her from her sadness. He was the only one who had ever wiped away her tears. But now it was all different. Riddle wiped away her tears last night. Riddle was the one who held her hand and told her that everything would be alright. Riddle was the one who calmed her fears.

This was what was beginning to scare her.

---

"Tom, considering the plan?" asked Alphard in a serious tone.

"What about it?"

"Do you think it wise to include Nadya?"

"You saw here first hand of what she is capable of…after that, can you still doubt her?" said Tom.

"I'm not doubting her capabilities…I'm doubting her heart." Alphard said softly.

"Her heart?" asked Tom somewhat perplexed.

"She's not like us Tom. She still has hope. Her heart is just frozen, but it's not dead. We are lost causes…blackened to the core. I can tell that she had a pure heart once…"

"But circumstances have changed that. The death of all of her loved ones has left her cold and numb. Her once pure heart is gone. She is a fit for our plans."

"It's not gone Tom!" Alphard raised his voice. It was rare that people saw Alphard angry. It is because it takes a lot to anger him. "She still has some hope in her. Do you want this for her coz I sure as hell don't!"

"What do you mean?" sneered Tom.

"We…all of us in the knights thrive on anger and pain. I've come into terms with that. We wouldn't think twice about hurting someone…but she still has compassion. Something we lost long ago. I saw it in her eyes just right now. She was worried about Katherine."

"How are you even sure---"

"Believe me Tom…I'm sure. That was the look my mother had in her eyes." He said quietly.

Tom knew better than to doubt Alphard now…not when he had advocated his memories just to be certain. The reference to the diseased Mrs. Black was more than enough to assure him of Alphard's conviction.

But he couldn't deviate.

"There is no time to backtrack Black. Our plans have already been put in motion. She is the only part missing. Everything will go as previously agreed upon."

"Very well. Do as you will. You know that I will support you."

"Wise decision Black." Tom nodded.

With that, Alphard turned around and walked to the exit.

Tom let out an exasperated sigh. Things were getting complicated by the minute.

'Things will go as planned.'

---

**A/N: Ha! An update! I am so sorry but my finals week came up and the brain couldn't multi task. So this isn't the longest chapter, but a lot did happen. I hope you like the update. Now in this chapter, I have revealed many a teaser…**

**1. The story of Alphard Black…the pain behind the laughter**

**2. Hermione's new fears**

**3. The Knight's plan**

**4. Tom is beginning to lose control on things**

**Oh…and Christmas is near! Watch out for what will happen on Christmas day!**

**Now I hope ya'll still love me even though I haven't been updating for a long time…as loyal little readers I hope you still review coz I thrive on your comments! FEED A HUNGRY AUTHOR!**

**TTFN!**

**The Tofuubeaver**

**PS: I wrote the song that Harry was singing! REMEMBER THAT SONG COZ IT WILL BE IMPORTANT!**


	13. Finding You

A/N: hello there people…I forgot to mention that the chapters **If I Could**, **Finding You **and **Understanding** all happened in one day…yes it is like a part one,two and three thing…I just kinda separated them coz it will add to the over all effect and suspense!

Thanks to all who reviewed last chapter and all the chapters to come…

PS: I am having a wee bit of writer's block considering my fic **I Hate My Life**...so please just be patient with me… I will not be abandoning it so don't give up hope just yet!

---

Tom had been glancing at the clock for an hour now. He left the library only moments after Alpahrd. He seemed agitated. He was now in the Slytherin common rooms. There was no sign of Nadya. It had been almost five hours since Nadya had left for the garden. Five hours. This was madness. He couldn't even last five hours without worrying about her.

Well the fact was that he couldn't last an hour…no… thirty minutes…without worrying about her. After she took her leave, his mind instantly reacted with worry. It was like anxiety was a reflex due to the lack of her presence. This was definitely not good.

He glanced back at the clock.

'Ok…five hours and three minutes…then again she never did say that she was coming back…ough!'

Yes, the almighty calm and collected Head Boy Tom Marvolo Riddle was now frustrated. His resolve strengthened and he decided that he would now go looking for her.

'I am pathetic.'

Then again, that statement didn't stop him from getting up from his seat and going out to look for her.

It was a pretty long walk from the library to the gardens. He didn't even know how she managed it. Maybe this was the reason why she was gone for such a long time.

'Oh that is just ridiculous!' he chastised himself. Where had that idiotic notion come from?

He knew where. It was from that tiny bit of his brain that worried about Nadya constantly. It was from that part of his mind that couldn't help but think about her. It was from that part of his brain that was obsessed with her.

He shook his head and began to walk faster. The sooner he found her, the sooner those thoughts would go away. He got to the archway leading to the garden.

He saw her there surrounded by the falling snow. Sure she wasn't the most gorgeous girl he had ever seen. She was pretty, but not gorgeous…but there was something in her…something that no other girl possessed. He didn't know what it was yet…but that 'something' was the object of his fascination.

'This is getting preposterous!'

He once again shook off his thoughts and proceeded to walk towards her. He took small but sure steps, each step bringing him closer to her. He could now see her face. Her eyes were closed and she seemed to be asleep.

'Strangely, she looks peaceful when she sleeps…" he thought awkwardly…but thenit hit him! "…wait she's ASLEEP?'

It had hit him like a five ton brick. Nadya was asleep…in the garden…in near freezing temperatures none the less! That wasn't called being asleep…THAT WAS BEING UNCONCIOUS!

How long had she been like this? He didn't even bother thinking about that. Tom quickly felt her had and it was icy cold. Without a moment's hesitation, he took off his cloak and wrapped it around Nadya. Tom picked her up from the bench and just ran. He ran through the corridors and carried her to his common room…it was nearer than the dungeons. He hastily muttered the password and entered the room without faltering. He didn't even think about the possibility of Amy (Headgirl) being there. All he knew was that he had to heat Nadya up somehow.

When he got there, he gently put her down in front of the fire as he gathered all the cloaks and blankets he could find. He wrapped them all around her, and finally he wrapped his own arms around her too.

Nadya was not waking up. She was still in a state of slumber. He scooted over closer to the fire and tightened his grip on her.

All that he did was out of pure and utter instinct. Tom wasn't even thinking. The only thing on his mind was to get her to wake up.

"Come on Cavanaugh…wake up." He whispered as he rubbed her arms for warmth.

He didn't have time to doubt his actions. All he knew was that he had to get her to open her eyes.

"Cavanaugh…"

She was still motionless in his arms. She just wouldn't wake, so he moved even closer to the flames. He didn't even think about how hot he felt this close to the fire. Again, all that was in his mind was that her body was still cold.

"Come on Nadya…open you eyes." He whispered softly in her ears.

"Tom?" Her chocolate eyes opened and saw Tom's face filled with concern.

"You're awake." A genuine smile graced his face. This was the first time that she had ever seen him smile. The smile she had seen in the garden was nothing compared to what she was seeing now. Sure he had smirked before, he had sneered, but never had she seen him smile.

"You should smile more often…it suits you." She said weakly, before blacking out.

---

Hermione woke up in a familiar setting. She recognized every feature of the room. Every table, lamp and chair was familiar. She was in her room. She was lying down on her bed…but somehow she knew that she just wasn't supposed to be there. She knew that she was supposed to be somewhere else.

"Good, you're wake." At that sound, Hermione instantly turned to her left and there she found one Tom Riddle sitting down on an armchair.

"Riddle?"

"Do you need anything?" he asked. She could see that he was sincere. Though his voice still remained cold, his eyes had compassion in them.

"No…thank you…but what are you doing here?" she asked, trying to sit up.

"Don't." he chastised her. "Just lie down."

Hermione did as she was told and stayed in her lying position. She didn't even know why she was obeying him.

"You fell asleep in the garden…good thing that I found you there." He said in a low but quiet voice. "What on earth do you think you were doing?" he said louder.

"I don't know." She simply replied. The truth was that Hermione couldn't even remember falling asleep.

"You could have died do you know that! Was that what you were trying to do!" he was fuming, although he still kept a calm exterior. "Cavanaugh I have had enough of this! I can't be around to save you all the time!"

_I can't be around to save you all the time_

Those words brought back a memory…a painful memory.

_It time. The final battle was starting. This was their last goodbye._

"_Harry don't go." Hermione muttered underneath all her tears. Harry was now going to go out and fight the Lord Voldemort._

"_I have to go 'Mione" he said as he wiped her tears. "But…I will come back." Harry wasn't sure if that was a promise that he could keep. Tears were now threatening to fall from his own eyes_

"_Then I have to go out there too…I have to fight…I want to."_

"_No!" Harry replied. "You have to stay safe. You have to stay safe for me."_

"_But Harry…"_

"_No buts 'Mione…I can't be around to save you all the time."_

"_Harry James Potter! I can take care of myself and you know that I can." _

_Harry sighed. "I know you can take care of yourself 'Mione…it's just…it's just that I want to be sure that you are safe…I have lost so many people to this war and I wont lose you!"_

"_Harry…" she said quietly. It was the truth. The war had killed everybody Harry had cared about…his parents…Sirius…Dumbledore…she could understand why he was scared._

"_Now listen to me. You know about the Room of Requirement right?" _

"_Yes." She said as she calmed herself._

"_And you know how to get inside?" she nodded in reply. "I want you to go there right now and ask for a place that you can be safe. I want you to stay in there and I'll come find you when it is all over." He said wiping away the last of her tears._

"_But Harry…"_

"_Please promise me Hermione…promise."_

_Hermione could see his determination and sincerity. He just wanted her to be safe. "I promise." She replied reluctantly, bowing her head._

"_Hey…" Harry picked up her chin and raised it so that her eyes met his. He opened his mouth and sang as his voice shook with the tears now flowing from his eyes._

_If I could_

_I'd take away your pain tonight_

_If I could_

_I'd gladly suffer just to see you smile_

_I'd wipe away your tears _

_I'd hold you tight and calm your fears_

_If I could_

_Only if I could_

"_I love you Harry." She wrapped her arms around his neck and embraced him as if for the last time._

"_I love you too 'Mione" he replied as he inhaled the scent of her hair, as if for the last time._

_An explosion could be heard from the background and the couple moved apart. They gave each other one last kiss, one which was reluctantly broken._

"_Come back to me Harry." She said softly to him._

"_I will." He kissed her on the forehead and unwillingly walked away. "Go to the Room of Requirement." And with that, he was gone…out of her sight._

'_I'm sorry Harry…but that is the one and only promise that I can't keep." Hermione took her wand in her hand and walked to the door…to the threshold of the war._

"Cavanaugh?" Tom had been calling out her name ever since he noticed her increasingly pale complexion. He could see her brows furrowing and her body wincing at the thought that ran through her.

"I have nightmares Riddle. I see him in my dreams."

"Who?" Riddle asked with hesitation.

"I see him killing all the people I love over and over again."

"The dark wizards?"

"Yes, dark wizards…his eyes haunt me every night so that I can't even fall asleep."

"You have to stop! You have to stop doing this to yourself!" He said darkly.

"Doing what?" she asked. Tom had no reason to flare up!

"Doing what? Torturing yourself with these memories. They are dead. They are all dead. There is nothing you can do about it…do you think that they would want this for you? Do you think that they would want you to live the rest of your life like a damn empty shell! No! They wouldn't want that…especially Harry. If he loved you the way I think he did…he wouldn't want to see you wasting your life away like you were the one who died and not him…"

"But the fact is Riddle, I did died along with him. I died with all of them!"

"No you didn't! You are alive! You are living and breathing! They are the only ones who are dead! YOU ARE STILL AMONG THE LIVING! START ACTING LIKE IT!" he said as he stood up and left her room.

But before he walked out of the door, he paused and quietly spoke. "You have to let go. Let go of them Cavanaugh. Let go of him." And with that, he was gone…leaving Hermione alone…alone with the words he had just spoken.

'He's right.'

---

_**TEASER:**_

"_**Riddle." Said a soft, barely audible voice from behind him. Tom turned around to see that it was Nadya. She had tears in her eyes and her body was shaking.**_

**_Tom rushed over to her and held her arms to keep her from falling down. She looked like she was about to faint. She was so weak, and she shouldn't have run all the way there. "You should be in bed." He muttered blankly._**

"**_You are right Riddle…you are right." And she broke down in his arms and cried. The thing was that…Tom let her. Tom Riddle had let Nadya Cavanaugh cry in his arms._**


	14. Since When

**A/N: hello guys! I am back with another chappie! Now I changed the chappie title but no big…**

**On to the fic!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing!**

---

'He's right.'

Hermione thought as she looked back on Tom's retreating figure.

'No...' she shook her head. 'No…no he's not.'

How could he be right? He had just told her to let go of her memories. He told her to let go of the only thing keeping her together. No Tom was wrong. She couldn't let go. He was wrong.

Hermione stood up from her bed. All of a sudden, she was feeling nauseous. She rushed to the bathroom and vomited all the contents of her stomach. This was the effect of not eating regularly. She continued to heave out what little her stomach had left. It exhausted her. She just sat there on the cold floor for a while. She sat there as Tom's words repeated themselves in her ears.

"_You have to let go. Let go of them Cavanaugh. Let go of him."_

"No…no…I can't…I just can't!" she chastised her thoughts. Why did his words have that effect on her? Why was she even letting herself be affected by them?

'Because they're true.' Said one part of her.

But how could she let go. Letting go would have to mean that she would have to accept it. She would have to accept the fact that they are all dead. Letting go would be giving up all hope of changing that.

"I can't let go…I just can't"

She weakly stood up and made her way to the sink. She turned on the tap and brought the cold water to her face. She looked up and was shocked to see what was before her.

Surely she hadn't changed that much…right?

Her eyes had dark circles under them and were red from crying so much. She was thin now, incredibly thin. She looked as if she hadn't eaten in all the time that she was there.

'Of course I've eaten…'

Yes she had eaten, but it had been such a long time since she did so. She couldn't even remember the last time that food touched her lips.

She was so pale right now. Her lips had lost all their former color and her cheeks were no longer rosy as they used to be.

She had changed so much. She looked so much older than she really was. When did this all happen?

'It happened while you were crying for what you've already left behind.'

She had wasted away.

---

Tom was pacing in his common rooms. It was the dead of night now. He just kept pacing and pacing in front of the fire. He was worried. Since when did he start to worry?

'Right about that you saw her cry...'

Had she really have that kind of an effect on him?

'Yes.'

It was true. It was her face that plagued his mind every night. He could see her waste away in front of him. He didn't want that to happen. He wanted her to be like when she first arrived…fiery, full of life, self assured. That was gone now. She was slowly spiraling downward and all he could do was watch. He was a spectator to her demise.

He had tried to help her up. He had repeatedly been the one advising her to take care of herself…even if he was a bit cold in doing so. No one could blame him for being like that. It was just his way. Since when did he start to care for someone so much?

'Ever since you helped wipe her tears away…'

He had wiped away her tears. He hated seeing her cry so he kind of just assimilated the responsibility. He just couldn't stand to see her so unhinged.

He let out a sigh of frustration.

He was losing control.

Tom was nothing without control. He needed to feel like he was on top of everything. He needed everything to go his way. It was only in that that he felt comfortable. Control meant power. He needed to feel that power. Since when did things start to be so disordered?

'It started about the time that you let her get the best of you…'

Nadya was his match. She was more than an intellectual competitor for him. She was much more. She was like his missing half.

'Missing half?'

Yes. Nadya Cavanaugh was exactly that. She was the only one who could deflate his oversized ego. She was the only one who could see past his icy exterior. She was the only one who could stand up to him without fear or hesitation. She was the only one who could see him as Tom…just Tom. Nadya was his other half.

Since when did he care for her so much?

'Since the first time that you saw her…'

---

Hermione was still sitting there in the bathroom. She just sat there staring blankly into space. It was as if that wall held all the solutions to her muddled up problems. It was if she was searching for the answer that didn't exist.

"_You have to let go. Let go of them Cavanaugh. Let go of him." _

Yes. Tom's voice was still ringing in her head. His voice was still there and it was telling her to let go.

"Let go…let go…" she kept saying that softly to herself. Somehow she wished that he was there right now. Since when did she ever want to be near him?

'Ever since he stayed with you as you cried...'

It was hard to believe, but Tom had always been there…watching over her…staying with her…being the one she could always depend on. He had slowly become her comfort. Each time she felt his presence, it was as if a little bit of her pain was taken away. He had that effect on her now.

Hard it is to believe, Tom was the one who looked out for her well being. He was the one constantly nagging her to eat right. He was the one who blew up every time he found out that she had been out without a cloak with her. He was the one who got worried when he saw the dark circles under her eyes. No matter how harsh he was in his words, those words were still words of compassion…words of someone who cared. Since when did she think that Tom cared about her?

'About the time that he wiped away your tears...'

Tom was the one who wiped away her tears. He was there to be her shoulder to cry on. He took that role without her asking him to. He did it just because… no questions asked.

She reverted her gaze to the floor.

She was losing control. Hermione had always been the one with the plans. She was always the calm one. She was always in charge. In the Golden Trio, she was the one who made sure that everything went along smoothly. But lately, she was feeling so unhinged. She felt like everything was spiraling out of her grasp. She had lost her grip on things. She hated that feeling. When did she start loosening her hold in things?

'It started the time that you opened up to him...'

Somehow she felt like Tom understood her. Tom shared her thirst for knowledge and control. They were both victims of fate…everything they had been taken from them by death. Tom knew her feeling of loneliness. They were both alone…no real friends…no actual relatives. It was like Tom was her other half.

'Other half?'

Yes, other half. Tom complemented her in everyway. He was the person who dragged her back to earth whenever she was in her 'I am always right' moods. He was her voice of reason. He was the one who took care of her. He was the one that kept her balanced. Since when did she start to care for Tom so much?

'Since the first time you saw him...'

---

Tom was shocked at his realization. Did he really care for her? He couldn't…he cared for no one. He didn't care for anyone…let alone for Nadya.

'Yes you do.'

Before he could even rebut his thoughts he heard the portrait door open. 'That couldn't be Amy.' It was his turn to do the rounds so it was safe to say that Amy was fast asleep in her room.

"Riddle." Said a soft, barely audible voice from behind him. Tom turned around to see that it was Nadya. She had tears in her eyes and her body was shaking.

Tom rushed over to her and held her arms to keep her from falling down. She looked like she was about to faint. She was so weak, and she shouldn't have run all the way there. "You should be in bed." He muttered blankly.

"When you told me to let go…I just couldn't believe what I was hearing. I couldn't believe that you had just told me to let go of the only thing that held me together."

"Cavanaugh…I…"

"Oh shut up Riddle. For once, just please let me finish." Tom stopped.

"I couldn't believe that you just did that. You had no right to tell me that. You had absolutely no right to tell me what I should or should not do."

"I only did it because…"

He couldn't finish what he was about to say because she reprimanded him again.

"Please Riddle! I didn't come all the way here, risking Mrs. Norris's wrath and possible detention just so you can butt in on what I'm saying."

Now that silenced him.

"But you got me thinking. My memories were not keeping me together. They were tearing me apart. It was happening to me and I just chose not to see it." She said as tears were coming out once more.

"Cavanaugh…" he whispered as he wiped away the salty droplets.

"Please Riddle." She pleaded as he stopped talking once again. "What I am trying to say is…you are right Riddle…you are right." And she broke down in his arms and cried. The thing was that…Tom let her. Tom Riddle had let Nadya Cavanaugh cry in his arms.

He sat them both down on the couch and allowed her to just cry. He could feel her hot tears drenching his robes. Tom wrapped his arms around her and stayed with her the whole night.

---

Tom reluctantly opened his eyes.

He realized that she had fallen asleep when her tears ceased and her breathing eased. He had fallen asleep to that sound…the sound of her breathing. It was relaxing for him.

Nut now as he woke, he realized that something was missing. Nadya was gone.

"Good morning sunshine."

'What the hell!' It was Amy. "Amy?"

"Yup Riddle." She smiled. "Might I say that you look especially agitated for someone who just woke from peaceful slumber…"

Amy was standing in front of him holding a cup of steaming hot coffee.

"Here." She said as she gave him the cup. "I think you need it more than I do."

He didn't reply. He just whipped around in search of Nadya. 'Where could she be?'

"She's gone." Amy said as she took a seat in the nearby armchair.

"What do you mean 'She's gone.'?"

"Gone as in she left about more than an hour ago." Amy replied as she conjured herself another cup of coffee.

"She left?"

"Yup." Amy took a sip of the coffee.

Amy was afraid of Tom, like all the others, but unlike the others…she didn't let it show. She always managed to put out a brave…even friendly exterior.

"I have to go find her." He murmured. 'God knows what she's done to herself.' He was worried, like always, about what she could be doing now. She wasn't emotionally stable when they last saw each other and he didn't want her to be alone.

"You know she has had a big impact on you."

"Oh what do you mean?" he replied irritably. He needed to go now! He had no time for small talk with the head girl.

"She changed you so much. I don't know what it is or how she did it…but this Nadya girl has been good for you." She took another sip of the coffee.

Had he become that transparent? Surely the change was not that great… he just shrugged it off and walked for the portrait door.

"I have no idea why you are so reluctant to love her, when you already do."

Now those words hit Tom like a brick. He stopped in his tracks and turned to Amy.

Who said anything about love?

Tom Riddle didn't love.

Tom Riddle couldn't love.

The whole thing was too inconceivable for him. Before he could say anything else, Amy beat him to it.

"She left a note." She took a small piece of parchment from her pocket, gave it to Tom and proceeded to her room. The moment Amy shut her door; Tom opened the note and read it.

**Tom,**

**Thank you for last night. I really appreciate it. I don't know what I would have done if you weren't there.**

She was thanking him. The thought of that made his heart flutter with an unknown feeling. And she had called him Tom.

**Again thank you.**

**Nadya**

**PS: Meet you at the Great Hall.**

The moment he read that last line, he rushed over to the Great Hall with a relief that at least he knew where she was.

When he entered the room, his eyes instantly searched the Slytherin table for any sign of her. Finally he saw her. She was eating…not a lot, but at least she was trying.

She was sitting there and talking with the other Knights. Alphard was making a joke and she was laughing. Tom was actually hearing Nadya's laugh for the first time. He couldn't understand why, but he just enjoyed watching the scene in front of him.

---

"And so I told the person…to hell with Blast Ended Skrewts… want a tattoo of a Hippogriff…" Alphard was telling another joke. It was about the time he got a tattoo, but the tattoo parlor put a blast ended skrewt instead of a hippogriff on his arm. She was laughing. The truth was that Hermione wasn't feeling up to hearing jokes, but she was trying. She was now picking up the pieces of her life.

She felt a pair of eyes burning into her. Someone was watching her. She looked around searching for those pair of eyes. Her gaze fell upon an ebony haired boy by the entrance. It was Tom. He was watching her. And, he was smiling.

---

Nadya's gaze met Tom's. He hadn't realized it, but he was smiling. He was actually smiling.

Nadya smiled at him. Her smile was a sight to see. All of a sudden, she looked younger and the huge amount of sadness in her eyes just disappeared.

She waved at him, and was gesturing for him to come over. He could do nothing but oblige. As he got nearer, he noticed that she had saved him a seat, and he took his place.

"Good morning." She greeted.

"Good morning." He nodded as he took a seat and shared in the story.

"Hey Tom!" Alphard greeted. "I was telling this story about my tattoo…you remember, the blast ended skrewt on my arm…" Alphard went on with his story.

Nadya leaned nearer to Riddle and whispered something in his ear. "You should smile more often. It suits you." And with that she went back to her food.

"_I have no idea why you are so reluctant to love her, when you already do."_

'Yes I do.'

Tom Riddle accepted facts.

He was in love with Nadya Cavanaugh.

---

**A/N: hey guys! Yet another chappie done! AH! Tom has finally accepted facts! I am so happy…**

**Thanks for all the reviewers from last chapter! You all made me so happy!**

**Now once again, feed a hungry author and review!**

**TTFN!**

**rita**


	15. Never Get Tired Of Staying

**A/N: This chapter was inspired by nehimasgift (Sharrie) and her little fic that I absolutely fell in love with (Nod Ick)! I loved it and you will to so after reviewing this chappie go read and review hers!**

**Thanks to all those lovely people who reviewed for the last chappie! I loff you all!**

**---**

"This is starting to become a habit." She whispered into Tom's ear. "Am I going to have to start to worry about you now?"

Tom was smiling again. She didn't know what happened to him, but suddenly, she noticed a slight change in him. She didn't actually know what happened.

"Unfortunately, smiling should be the least of your worries. If you don't drink this soon, you will have blotchy eyes, a stuffy nose and a massive head ache." He held out a phial of brownish-purplish-reddish looking goop that smelled fouler than it looked.

You see, sleeping in the gardens in the middle of winter didn't come without its repercussions. Hermione was now down with a massive case of the common cold.

"No. It looks horrible and it smells worse than it looks." She turned away from him.

She was lying on her bed, while Tom sat beside her. He made Madame Pomfrey look nice. Tom refused to let Hermione out of bed let alone her room. He had performed a locking spell on it so that people could come in and out…all except for her. He had also put a spell keeping her in her bed. She couldn't leave nor even step foot on the floor. Tom gave a new and harsh meaning to the phrase 'full bed rest'.

"If you don't drink this now I will have to tell your Uncle about the little situation that led you into this in the first place." He smirked at her.

"You wouldn't." she narrowed her eyes and raised a challenging eyebrow.

"Oh I would and you know it." He smirked and raised an eyebrow of his own.

She stared him down for a bit. Neither gaze faltering, neither backing down. They were both as stubborn as mules and wouldn't give up their resolves.

"You may be stubborn Nadya, but you are not the one who can leave the room. If you don't drink this I swear I will go to your Uncle and tell him the whole story." Tom threatened amusingly.

"I hate you Tom Riddle." She said as she took the foul looking substance from him.

"Yeah yeah…and you will curse me to the ends of eternity once you get out of that bed…I have heard it before Nadya. Just drink the potion and get it over with." He smiled.

Hermione looked at the medicine with disgust. She didn't want to drink it…but she had to or else Tom would go tattling to Professor Dumbledore. So she closed her eyes and drank it. "I hate you with a passion Tom Riddle and you will pay. Watch out the day that I get out of this bed will be the day you will find yourself unable to reproduce." She threatened him with narrow eyes.

"You never cease to amaze me Cavanaugh. Your threats are getting better. Now lie back down and sleep. You look exhausted." He urged her to rest.

"I wouldn't be exhausted if you hadn't woken me up to drink that…that…ough I hate you." She lied back down on her bed and put the covers on top of her head. Something about Tom infuriated her…but in a good way.

"How is the dear patient?" she heard someone enter.

"Fine, Prince's potion should take effect in an hour or so." She heard Tom respond.

"So Eileen was the one who made that potion." She muttered underneath the sheets. "Add Eileen to hate list. I hate Tom Riddle and I hate Eileen Prince."

"Perhaps you should add Alphard Black to that growing list of yours Nadya. He was the one who suggested the potion in the first place."

Hermione emerged from the covers. "Thank you for that." She said to Tom. "I hate you Alphard Black." She said darkly as she went back underneath the covers.

"So she is this amusing when she's sick?" asked Alphard in a hushed tone.

"For the last time I AM NOT SICK! Achooooooooooo!"

"I say you are and as I said before go to sleep before I jinx you to slumber." Tom said with laughter threatening his voice.

With one swift motion, Alphard pulled the covers revealing Hermione's blotchy face. "Oh come on Nads! I can't leave with you angry at me, can I!"

"First of all, never call me Nads again or along with Tom…I will personally make sure that there will be no little Alphards to look forward to." She said darkly. "And second of all, I will not forgive you for suggesting that…that…that…ACHHOOOOO!"

"Black, stop aggravating her…it just makes her more irritable and my job of taking care of her harder." Tom hissed.

"Fine Tom…I know when I am not wanted." He laughed and headed for the door. "You are worse than Madame Pomfrey you know." Alphard snickerd.

"Shut up Black."

"Fine…but promise to see me off before I visit my parents alright?" he said seriously.

"I'll be there." Tom nodded.

"Alrighty then! Bye Nadya!" he said before going out.

"I hate you Alphard." She said with an utterly sarcastic smile and grumbled back under the covers.

"Ah what a bundle of sunshine you are Nadya."

"Shut up Riddle." She said before it clicked in her mind.

Alphard was visiting his parents? But wait…weren't his parents dead?

"_His sources had told him that I was an orphan, and being one himself…he took it upon himself to teach me the ropes of Slytherin house…"_

"Tom?" Hermione softly called him.

"Yes? Do you need anything?" he asked immediately.

"No. I'm fine." Honestly, Hermione was not use to anyone fussing over her like this…not even Harry. "Alphard said that he was visiting his parents?"

"Yes he did."

"I don't mean to pry…but…aren't his parents dead?" she asked hesitantly.

"The thing you have to understand about Black is that underneath all the laughter and jokes…the guy is just barely kept together. He was young, about five when it happened." Tom was hesitant to reveal everything. If he had anything that resembled a true friend, Alphard would be his best friend.

"It's ok. You don't have to tell me." She said quietly. Hermione could sense that Tom was a little hesitant. She couldn't blame him though.

"No. I trust you."

His words were unexpected. Hermione was in shock. Tom actually trusted her. She felt a sudden pride and relief in knowing this. Tom went on.

"Well, he was at home when it happened. His parents were out that night. Nobody actually knows what happened. All that is known is that a muggle shot his parents."

So that was why Alphard was a member of the knights. He wanted revenge for his parents…a vendetta in honor of their senseless murders. She could understand now.

"Alphard grew up alone. The only relatives he knew were his Aunt Willa and Katherine."

"I still don't understand why he said that he was visiting his parents?" she pondered.

"When he was old enough to know what money can do, he had a house built by his parent's graves. He lives there now. He never goes back to the old mansion."

Hermione suddenly felt a great wave of pity for Alphard. He was just like her, clinging to something that is nothing more than a memory.

An awkward silence followed. Hermione was slowly drifting into sleep and Tom was still watching over her.

"I bet you are sick of taking care of me." She yawned.

"Never." He quietly answered. "Now go to sleep." He tucked her in and headed for the door.

Hermione didn't want him to leave. She wanted her to stay with him, even though it was such a selfish thing to do since he hadn't left her side the whole day. She felt a strange comfort in his presence and she didn't want that comfort to leave.

"Tom…"

Tom turned around at the mention of his name. "Yes?"

"Wait…would you mind it terribly if I asked you to stay?" she said, at the border of sleep.

"Of course I wouldn't." he replied softly.

"Then will you stay with me…just until I fall asleep?" She felt strange asking this of him…but then again it felt like the most normal thing in the world.

"I'll stay." He slowly nodded. Some how, she felt relieved hearing him say that. She felt reassured that he would be there to stay with her and make sure that nothing went wrong.

"Thank you." And with that Hermione rolled over to one side of her bed, leaving the other side free for him to stay at.

Tom sat on the bed and leaned his head on the headboard. Hermione unconsciously draped one arm around him and, with the new yet familiar sense of security, instantly fell asleep.

---

Needless to say, Tom was surprised. Nadya had asked him to stay. Nadya wanted him to stay. He could do nothing less than oblige her.

When she wrapped her arms around him, he was too ecstatic to be shocked. The woman that he recently discovered that he was in love with was lying not two centimeters from him. What more could he ask for.

She could hear her breathing. Her breath in itself was like a soothing melody. Each breath of hers was in tune to the beat of his own heart. He looked at her in peaceful slumber. Not a worry or care on her face. She looked eternally blissful in her current state. She was beautiful.

She moved closer to him and held him tighter.

The Gods were definitely smiling on him today! What had he done to deserve this?

Tom reveled in the moment. It was perfect. He was actually happy. He was more than happy. He was practically rapturous! The moment was perfect.

---

Hermione woke up to see that Tom had fallen asleep too. But what surprised her was the fact that she had her arms wrapped around him. She was holding him so close that the gap between them was almost nonexistent.

She was so embarrassed.

She couldn't believe that she was hugging…no…embracing…she'd even go as far as caressing…Tom Riddle. This was so NOT RIGHT!

But somehow, she didn't want to move. She didn't want to take her hands off him. She wanted to be this close. She wanted to remain in the same nonexistent distance. She just didn't want to move.

She laid her head on his chest. She could hear his heart beating.

'So he does have a heart.'

His heart was moving to the same beat as her breaths. They were steady and relaxed. He was so peaceful when he was asleep. It was the complete opposite of when he was awake.

He tried to hide it, but she saw. There was so much confusion and tribulation in his eyes. He had a sadness in him that she could only see the surface of. His loneliness was as transparent to her as her own.

She could see the real him in his heart beat. It was tranquil and welcoming. It was the rhythm of the heart of a boy who was in there somewhere, scared of the unknown and scared to be alone. It was in his heart beat that she understood him.

She just stayed there, her arms around him and her head on his chest…listening to the heart that she was slowly learning to love…even without her knowing.

Hermione closed her eyes and slept once more.

---

Tom woke up again.

Nadya was now laying her head on his chest, as if listening to the beat of his heart. It was a wonderful feeling to feel her that close. He wanted this. In the deep depths he did want this. He wanted this to be the thing he woke up to every morning. Her breaths. Her scent. The soft sound of her light snoring. He wanted the whole package.

Nadya was stirring. On basic instinct, he cooed to her softly and gently stroked her hair. He didn't know if he just wanted her to stay asleep so he could stay in the moment or if he just wanted her to rest, but he did it.

He didn't want to dwell on the reason for his actions; he just wanted to revel in the moment…he doubted the possibility of it ever happening again. He just leaned back again and closed his eyes as he inhaled her scent.

---

_Hermione was running again. She was running so fast. She didn't want him to catch up. She was so scared that she could taste the metallic tang of it in her tongue._

_She ran faster._

"_You can't hide Hermione, I will find you."_

_She ran faster. She just had to get away. Hermione passed through familiar halls…halls that have failed her before…halls that had trapped her before. She avoided them._

_She ran in a different direction. She just ran as fast as she could._

'_He mustn't find me! He can't! I can't get trapped again.'_

_Her thoughts made her panic and that made her run all the more faster. She just couldn't get caught this time. Finally a dead end came. It was the door that led to the snare._

'_I can't go in there!' her mind screamed, but the footsteps were getting louder and louder. She had to go in or else he would catch her. _

'_But if I go inside, he'll catch me too!'_

_She couldn't decide what to do!_

"_I am coming Hermione…' said a familiar voice. _

_Hermione threw reason out of the window and went inside the door. She was terrified. She was now trapped as if waiting for death to come for her._

_Suddenly, she felt someone grab her shoulders. She had been caught. _

_She was terrified to turn to her assailant. She didn't want to look into those eyes. She didn't…but she had to. It would all end when she looked into his eyes. _

_She hesitantly turned around and faced her fears._

_Those eyes horrified her beyond belief…but they weren't the same eyes as before. They instilled the same, even greater, fear…but these eyes were different. _

_Instead of the normal onyx eyes…._

…_the eyes she saw now were emerald green._

"_Nadya!"_

"_Nadya!"_

---

"Nadya!"

Tom had awoken to Nadya's violent movements. Tears were steaming down her eyes and sweat covered her whole body. Her face had lost its former peace and tranquility. It was now encased in fear and panic.

"Nadya!"

He had been trying to wake her up, but nothing would work. Nothing would snap her from the horrors that lay inside her mind.

"Nadya!"

He was now panicking. He just couldn't wake her up. The stress and worry was now building up within him. He couldn't stand one more minute of watching her like this.

"NADYA!"

Finally, she abruptly opened her eyes. She was crying so hard now. Nadya launched herself into Tom's arms and held him tightly as she wept.

What had happened? What had been in that dream that scared her so?

He didn't know and he didn't care. All that mattered was that it had ended now and that she was free from whatever demons haunted her sleep.

He kept her in his arms as she wept. He felt his shirt becoming moist with all the tears that she had shed. This was an all too familiar scene to him.

"It's ok now. Nothing is going to hurt you." He cooed to her. It was more of a promise than a statement. He promised her and himself that she wouldn't be harmed again. He would do all that he could to prevent her tears from flowing again.

"I…I just had to run…I was so scared…" she tried to talk, as if owing him an explanation.

"Don't try to talk." He whispered in her hair. She didn't need to explain anything to him. Somehow, totally uncharacteristically, he didn't need to know.

---

Seeing Tom's eyes when she woke was a blessing to Hermione. Those midnight eyes that had once brought so much anger and terror now only brought comfort.

She didn't know why there was such a sudden change in her, but she wasn't fighting it…because for the first time in months, she felt like she wasn't alone.

She just cried and cried and he just let her.

"You must be so tired of wiping away my tears." She tried to laugh amidst her tears.

"Never." He replied quietly.

"Please don't leave." She whispered.

"I'll stay as long as you need me." He whispered back.

Once again, both fell asleep, now fully conscious that the other's arms were wrapped around them, and frankly neither of them wanted to let go.

---

**A/N: Hello there my little loffs! I have written another filler chapter! Don't worry the next will be better I promise…at least I hope.**

**Now there are a few things that I need to advise you off concerning this chapter:**

_**You have to get the dream. All of the dreams in this fic are interconnected! Find out the meaning of the dreams and you will know what has just happened concerning their feelings for each other**_

_**Please note Alphard's background for it will come into play in the future! It is important!**_

**Now I will appreciate it now if you pressed the little button over there and give me a review….**

**Loff you all!**

**TTFN**

**rita the insane one**

**PS: I might be changing my penname so don't be surprised if one day this fic is listed under another name…LOL!**


	16. Let Me Know

**Disclaimer: Nothing is mine except the Plot! Thanks for acknowledging that:D**

---

**_I remember the nights when we lay under the stars and danced in the rain…_**

The sun shone in the horizon. It kissed the ethereal hilltops and brought morning to the entirety of Hogwarts. The birds began to sing the new day in.

In the Far West corner of the old castle, down in the dungeons, through the common rooms and up the staircase…there was a room. Inside that room was a vision of peace inside the viper's lair. A young woman and a young man slept in peaceful slumber. His hands were wrapped protectively on her waist and her head lay gently on his chest. They had been in that position although the night. Both slept with more ease than they ever had in their lives.

The young woman's face was draped with bliss and contentment. This was the first time she had felt secure in a long time. For the first time, she didn't have doubts, fears or worries. She was happy.

The young man seemed to be in the exact same state of mind. He had always wanted more in life, always craving for a higher status…but now it seemed like he was content.

Their heartbeats were in harmony, their breaths in sync. They were a perfect fit…the other's missing half.

---

**_You make me feel like I can get lost inside your eyes…_**

"Wake up Tom…"

A soft voice was gently lulling Tom to consciousness.

"Tom…"

A gentle touch was prodding him out of slumber.

"Tom you need to wake up…"

That gentle voice was the one he wanted to hear every morning. "I will in a minute."

The voice laughed. "You have been saying that for the past five minutes…"

"Well, be prepared to wait five minutes more…" he smirked as she shut his eyes tighter in teasing protest.

"Do I look like the kind of person who waits?" he could sense that she smirked in return.

"It is the Holidays so I don't need to wake up at the crack of dawn."

"Well, it is ten o'clock a.m., hardly the crack of dawn anymore."

"Why are you in such a hurry to wake me up anyway?"

"Aside from the fact that I can't move…it is too late to be in bed." The voice protested.

"Is your immobility such a bad thing?" he smirked, still closing his eyes.

The voice hesitated in its answer…but answered nonetheless. "I need to brush my teeth." It lamely argued.

"Oh that is genius! How did you ever come up with that?" he mocked.

"Are you going to open your eyes or not?"

Tom cautiously opened his eyes and immediately, he saw the girl beside him. Her curly hair was haphazardly scattered in every direction imaginable, her hazel eyes were all puffy and her complexion was quite pale as a result of her recent illness…but nonetheless, she looked…perfect.

"Now is that so terrible?" she asked, smiling at him.

"Utterly not."

"Good, because now that you are up…and I am up…we can get up." She said confidently.

"That made no sense at all." he laughed at her ludicrous statement.

"Even if that is true…it is beside the point." She dismissed his idea as she stood up and searched for her slippers under the bed.

"How is it beside the point?" he asked as he met her gaze under the bed as he looked for his own shoes.

"Because….aha!" Nadya exclaimed as she found her misplaced footwear. "Because, you need to go to your room. Wear something very warm and meet me in the Grand Staircase at exactly 10 minutes…if you are not there by then, I will invade your room whether you are dressed or not."

Though the thought of Nadya coming in his room while he was barely dressed was intead intriguing and inviting, Tom put away those thoughts as he tried to make sense of all that she was saying. "You are still not making any sense whatsoever…" he asked, obviously very confused. 'Maybe this is a side effect of the potion…' his mind began to worry.

"I won at chess." She explained as if it would shed any light whatsoever.

"And you decide to gloat now?" he pointed out to her, still fairly confused.

"I won at chess and I am choosing today as the day I cash in my winnings." She smirked.

Now it hit Tom. Under the terms previously agreed upon, which he so foolishly instigated, the loser was under the victor's command for one whole day…and Nadya won.

"You didn't think I would forget that now did you?" her smirk grew.

"Honestly I thought you would." Tom gulped.

"Well, I didn't. Now go get dressed and meet me in the Grand staircase in ten minutes or else…." With that she pushed him out of the door and Tom found himself at the mercy of a very controlling young lady.

"Should I be scared now?"

---

**_One smile then I die, only to be revived by you._**

Tom arrived with the lack of his usual punctuality. He was contemplating the necessity of his presence when he would surely be subjected to some sort of punishment or ridicule. But then again, he did loose the bet. Though Tom was cunning, scheming and ambitious, he was not dishonorable. He decided that since he did lose the bet, he would have to suffer the consequences.

It wasn't morals that Tom had, it was more of principles.

He arrived at the designated place of the Grand Staircase at a the record time of five minutes late. There, he spied Nadya constantly looking at the grandfather clock nearby whilst tapping her foot. Obviously, she was now looking extremely agitated and Tom had no doubt that he was the target of all this animosity.

Since she was completely oblivious to his presence, Tom decided to discretely announce himself with a slight cough.

True enough, she turned around.

"You are five minutes late To---" her little speech was interrupted by the sudden elevation of amusement to her face. She cocked her head to the side and smiled.

His curiosity could no longer be held back, so against better judgment he resolved to get to the bottom of things.

"May I ask what you find oh so amusing?" he smirked.

"If you must." she cracked.

"Then by all means...enlighten me as to your...well...your amusement." he gestured her to continue.

"You are wearing Muggle clothes."

"And that is supposed to be amusing?" he grimaced. "I was raised by a Muggle orphanage so I wear Muggle clothes ok." he explained irritatedly.

'It's not like it's a freaking circus or anything.' Tom hated people who made fun of his Muggle heritage or his Muggle upbringing. It seemed to insult him in every way. This was no exception.

"Listen." Nadya took a few steps toward him. "Don't take it the wrong way ok." she smiled. "It actually suits you."

Now that surprised him. There were only three Wizarding reactions to his muggle background. It was either pity, ridicule or disgust. Her reaction was none of the above. He was stunned.

"Oh." was the only thing he could say.

She looked perplexed with his reaction, but nonetheless kept everything to herself. "Ok then, we better get going before we are late."

"May I ask where you are taking me?"

"Now that, Tom, is a secret." she smirked.

"You are filled with secrets aren't you. How am I supposed to be sure that this isn't a one way trip to utter embarrassment and torture?" he smirked right back.

"You trust me don't you?" she simply replied.

Trust.

It was something that Tom didn't give easily. He hardly trusted anybody. Life was treacherous to him so he never had faith in it.

Did he trust her? Was he willing to trust her? She asked such a simple question, and yet the answer was far from simple.

"Tom?"

Tom snapped back to reality. Nadya was staring at him with worry and it seemed like minuted have flown by.

"Are you alright Tom?" No one had ever worried for him. He was used to the dog eat world he grew up in. He was accustomed to watching out for himself. He was certainly capable of doing so, and yet...Nadya still had that worry on her face. She still managed to think that he needed to be looked after.

"Yes." he said. 'Yes I do trust you.'

Nadya smiled. "Good. You had me worried for a while."

"You shouldn't have."

"Well I was." she smiled at him. "Come on. Let's go." she got a hold of his hand.

"Alright." he conceded.

---

**_There I was thought I had everything figured out, just goes to show how much I know about the way life plays out._**

"We are lost aren't we?"

"Of course we are not."

"Then where are we?"

"I have no idea."

"See. I told you. Lost."

Nadya had dragged Tom though an assortment of passages, corridors and hallways up to the point where he didn't know where the heck they were. Even he didn't know that Hogwarts was this big...and he was the head boy. He had a feeling that they were terrible and utterly lost.

"No we are not lost." she laughed. "Just keep watch ok."

"We have no idea where we are, we are going around in circles and you have been pacing around that statue two times now. I would say we are lost."

"I am pacing for a reason and just because I have no idea what this place is called...it doesn't mean that I have no idea where we are."

"Oh will you just hush up." he tried not to laugh. "I think I have got it."

"Got what?" Tom turned around and saw that there was a door where there was none before.

"Was that door always there?"

Nadya only smirked in response.

"Fine, we were not lost." he grumbled.

"Good Tom, you are finally catching on." she smirked at him. "Now get in before anybody sees." she rushed him.

"I never thought I would live to see the day that someone is more bossy than me." he rolled his eyes.

He let out an exasperated sigh and entered the mysterious room.

"Hurry." She said as she pushed him inside the room and went in herself.

"I cant see a bloody thing." The room was pitch black. He couldnt see the nose in front of him.

"Oh hold on to your horses." she pacified him. "Impatient git." she grumbled the last part.

He inwardly laughed at that statement which she inconspicuously hid from him. Nadya turned on the lights and what he saw dazzled him.

It was a library bigger than anyone he had ever seen. It was a room filled with shelf after self of books. It was a marvel to behold.

"Judging by the look on your face, I would say you like it. Am I right?" he turned to see her smiling at him.

"Whoa...I mean...whoa...how?" he couldn't form proper sentences because of the shock.

"This is my thank you to you, for taking care of me. I may be a handful, but I want you to know that I appreciate you putting up with my foul moods."

"Wha?" that was all he could say.

"All the books here are...well they are not literally yours, but they are yours for the day." she smiled.

"I don't know what to say." he whispered. No one had ever given him a gift. He didn't know how to react. "Thank you."

"Well go on, browse...take a peak at it. These books aren't going to read themselves. I'll race you." she ran.

"To where?"

"I have no idea." she laughed as she kept running in between the shelves. "Oh don't tell me you can't even catch a girl Tom. Now that is just pathetic. And I was the one who was sick?" she teased him as she laughed.

"Oh it is on." he gave in and ran after her.

They zig zagged passed the different shelves, paying a little game of tag. Tom was actually having fun. He was running around a mysterious library and he was chasing a girl who's mystery matched that of the library.

"Oh come on. Are you seriously doing your best? I am so disappointed." said a laughing voice behind him. He turned around to see here trying to hide behind a book shelf. Her thick hair gave her away.

Tom began to tip toe to her hiding place, careful not to give away the element of surprise.

"Tom where are you?" she asked. What she didn't know was that Tom was closer than she thought. Now Tom was directly behind her, just waiting for the opportune moment.

"Tom," she came out of her hiding place only to find him right behind her.

"Boo." he said and he grabbed a hold of her waist and tackled her to the floor.

There it was. They were both down on the floor smiling and laughing like two people...dare I say it. They were like two people in love.

"Let go Tom." she laughed.

"Never." he whispered.

Suddenly, he felt Nadya fall silent. Obviously she had heard that last statement. "Umm...I..." he let her loose and sat up.

"Let's browse shall we?" she stood up and smiled at him. She held her hand out to help him up.

'Maybe she didn't hear after all.' he appeased himself and took her hand.

---

**_I take one step away, just to find my self coming back to you._**

**_Let me know if I am doing this right, let me know if my grip is too tight, let me know if I can stay all of my life_**

They had been in the strange room for three hours now. Each had a book and was reading in front of an uncannily convenient fireplace they found somewhere in the middle of the room, just when Tom wanted to sit down.

He just finished the book and got up.

"I'm gonna look for another book ok?" he told a very engrossed Nadya. She was reading a muggle book and was fully immersed in her reading.

She just nodded in response and left him to inwardly chuckle on his way.

He looked around the shelves in search of something interesting until a certain book caught his eye. It wasn't like all the other books. A picture had just fallen from it, and to his surprise, it was a picture of Nadya.

He quickly picked up the photograph and went to the book. He took it from the shelf and quickly opened it. Inside, he found that this wasn't a book, but an album...all pictures of Nadya. There were some from her childhood, some from her adolescence even one of her in a periwinkle gown with a Scandinavian-looking boy in her arm. It looked like a collection of all the most important moments in her life.

He flipped through it to see more. He walked back to the fire place, taking the album with him.

"What are you smiling at?" Nadya looked up at him. "Is that a photo album?"

"Yeah, I found it in one of the shelves. It's filled with all sorts of pictures." he kept flipping through it. "

"Let me see." she stood up and peered at it. Before he could say no, she came over an caught a glance at the contents. All of a sudden, the look of happiness drifted away from her face and what replaced it was a ghostly expression.

"I knew that your hair was bushy back then, but I never thought it was this bushy.

"Where did you find that?"

"I was looking through the shelves and---"

"Don't answer that? What were you thinking before you saw it?" she grew paler.

"What?"

Worry and panic came over her. He didn't know what had caused such a reaction. They were only pictures after all.

"What is the matter?" he came to her.

"You can't look at that...you cant..." she whispered.

"What?"

"You can't look at it anymore." she told him in a louder voice. That did it.

Tom had had enough of this. "What are you so afraid of?" he asked.

"Tom please put that back where you found it..."

"Are you afraid that I might find out about your past?"

"Just put it back Tom."

Tom put the album down on the table and took a step closer to her, only for her to back away.

Could simple pictures be the root of such anxiety in her. Even he didn't strike this much fear in her.

"They are just pictures Nadya. They wont hurt you."

"They may be just pictures to you, but they are memories to me." she said quietly. "You never should have taken that album. Damn your curiosity Riddle! All those pictures bring is pain."

"Alright, you know what I was thinking before I found the book. I was thinking of how much better you look when you smile. I was thinking that life would be better for you and me if I saw that smile more often." he angrily told her. He was really getting annoyed by her constant fear of her past.

"What?" she looked at him.

"Yeah you heard right Cavanaugh. I want to see you smile. I certainly prefer it to seeing you cry all the time." he took the album from the table and opened it in front of her so that the pictures were staring her at the face. "See. All of them are of you smiling. No pain. No fear. Perfect." he told her angrily "You told me that I needed to smile more often, but I'd much prefer to see you try to smile." he continuously turned the pages in front of her. "Your smile is much better than any tear you shed." he said quietly.

He closed the gap between them, wrapped his arms around her and kissed her then and there.

He expected her to pull away. He expected her to shout. He expected her to be angry. He expected her to walk away...But she didn't. Stayed in his arms. She kept silent in his kiss. She kissed him back.

Tom had kissed girls before. He had actually kissed many a girl before. H had kissed with passion, he had kissed with lust, he had even kissed with no feelings at all...but he had never kissed with love. This was the first time he had ever kissed a girl with love. It was better than any kiss he had ever had.

Reluctantly, he pulled away. He took three steps away from her and just looked at her. There was an expression of daze, surprise and amazement in her eyes.

"What was that?" she finally spoke.

"It was a kiss." he spoke softly.

"Why?" she asked, with her voice trembling.

"Isn't it obvious?" he took a step closer.

She shook her head. "I want to hear it...just to be sure. Just so I can be sure."

"Listen, I know I can never be enough to replace your whoever. I am not perfect. I am not the nicest guy around. I am not the sweetest person to be with. Needless to say, I am no saint..but with you, I feel myself trying to be one. I have been feeling this for quite sometime. Everything about you is new. How is that I can feel this way about you? I have no idea. I never know anything when it comes to you. All I know that is everything I see you passing by I find my self staying behind until your out of sight and that I feel like every thing is still without you near. I am not asking you to feel the same...I just want you to know."

He finished and seeing as there was no expression on her face, he turned around and headed for the door. He walked away from her not knowing what to think or feel. He had just told her everything that he had been trying so hard to hide.

"Tom?"

That voice made Tom stop in his tracks. Did she just call him. He turned around to see her only a few steps away from him.

"Yes?" he replied.

"What took you so long?"

"What?"

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I guess I was afraid of what your reaction might be." he confessed.

"Well..." she told him as she closed the gap between them. "Contrary to your self made conclusion, I feel the same..." Then, she stood on her toes, wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him as lovingly as he did her.

"I'd smile for you any day Tom." she whispered in his ear.

**_Let me know if dreams can come true, let me know if this one's yours to because I see it and I feel you right here._**

_---_

**A/N: There you go guys! After a long and tedious wait... I have finally written the latest chapter of Desperation! I loved writing this chapter and Tom's confession kinda made me tear up a bit...I know that I took such a long time to update...I hope that this was worth the wait!**

**I do hope that I made it clear where they are and how that album suddenly popped out. **

**This story is nearing it's end. Only 6 more chapters until it ends. I hope I see ya'll in the end. The final chapter is already writen and I promise you that it will make you cry...it made me cry. **

**Thank you for being patient and thank you to all who reviewed in the previous chapter.**

**The update for I Hate My Life Will be coming in three days. Please wait up for that. And please keep visiting my website regularly because a new teaser will be posted up there within the month of July.**

**Byee!**

** thetofuubeaver **


	17. Escape

**A/N: This is going to knock your little socks off. Have fun!  
Plus standard disclaimer applies.**

It was an ordinary day. Nothing out of the usual was happening. The sun still shone. The snow still fell. The birds still kept on chirping. And, Nadya and Tom were still reading in the library.

They still sat in that same table and they were still not talking. But there were slight differences. Nadya was no longer sitting in the chair opposite Tom. She was not sitting right beside him. Tom was no longer focused on his book, he kept stealing glances at the person beside him. Nadya wasn't fully detached anymore, she was drawing circles with her finger on Tom's open palm.

Ok. Fine. It wasn't an ordinary day after all.

"Now what do we have here? It seems that I have missed something of mythic proportions while I was gone. Care to fill me in?"

"My, my, Alphard. I guess a few weeks aren't enough to drive the annoyance out of you. Pity." smirked Nadya as she emerged from behind her book.

"Observant as that may be Nadya, I still don't get what is happening." he smirked back.

"Oh come on Black. You can't be that ignorant. I held you in higher esteem than that." Tom droned nonchalantly.

"Fine. So I do know what is happening. I have been expecting it for a while. So I guess Eileen finally wins the bet. I was off by 2 months."

That got both their attentions.

"WHAT?" the couple simultaneously gasped.

"Well, the knights had a bet going...Eileen said that you would get together before Christmas, I said sometime Halloween, Greyback put down a bet for sometime near Graduation and Malfoy said that you would get together after Graduation." he stated simply.

"Well, at least Dolohov didn't stoop down to your levels." Nadya grumbled as she buried her face in Tom's arm, partly out of embarrassment and partly because she wanted to hide a fit of laughter.

"Stoop down! I will have you know that Dolohov was the bookie of this whole event."

"Impossible, all of you are impossible." Tom shook his head in utter disapproval.

"You are the one who is impossible Tom. If you had only plucked up the courage two months ago, I would have had a few extra galleons in my pocket. But no. You simply had to bide your time." he complained as he sat down adjacent to the couple.

"Oh and you just gained ten more points in my hate list Alphard." grimaced Nadya, but then something struck her. "Wait, why are you back so early? It is not even January yet."

"Well, after I visited my parents, I came to stay with my Aunt Willa and the wonderful Kat-Kat. It would have been a pleasure to torture her all Christmas, believe me, but her new fiance had come over too so I decided to give them some room." he smirked. He had an 'I-know-something-you-don't-know' look on his face and it was so unnerving. Alphard looked like a five year old who just gotten a pony for his birthday.

"I know I am going to regret asking this, but why pray tell are you smiling like an idiot?" she asked hesitantly.

"I am not smiling like an idiot." he pointed a reprimanding finger her direction.

"Of course Black isn't smiling like an idiot Nadya."

"Thank you Tom." Alphard sat back in a contented manner. He spoke too soon.

"Black is an idiot." Tom corrected her in jest.

"Of course. I understand. Point taken Tom." she smiled at his remark.

"Oh look, Tom makes jokes now. Oh Nadya you have brought such a change in my little boy." he wiped away an imaginary tear.

"Oh come on Alphard, don't evade the question." she smiled. "Please tell." she said as she gave Tom a barely noticeable wink.

"You never say please to me." Tom complained as he caught on.

"That is because I don't have to beg with you. I can make you do anything I want." she smirked and kissed his cheek. "You are so cute Care Bear."

"Not as much as you are cute Google Bunny." he tickled the tip of her nose.

"No Squirrel Munch, you're the cute one." she giggled. It was confirmed. Nadya was good.

"Oh shut it already! Fine. I will tell." Alphard said disgusted. "God, you didn't have to resort to the pet names. The peck on the cheek was enough to drive me to the mad house." he shuddered.

"I knew you would break somehow. Sappiness like that would have made anyone puke. Maybe I should even tell Dolohov to develop this into a new form of psychological torture." she smiled. "Face it Alphard, you can't be evasive when it comes to me. Now spill."

"Ok." he took a deep breath. "Kat-kat's fiance is ..." he laughed and rolled on the floor.

"Who?" the two said simultaneously.

Alphard made another indistinguishable sound as he once again laughed on the floor. Thank God the librarian went home on the holidays.

"In English Black." Tom made and impatient remark. Needless to say, the suspense was killing him, but he would never let anyone know.

"MALFOY! ABRAXAS MALFOY!" he managed to huff out amidst his fits of hilarity.

"You have got to be kidding me." Tom fought the urge to drop his jaw. 'No one deserves such cruelty.'

"Oh yes. It seems like Aunt Willa and Mr. Malfoy have arranged this way before the couple were old enough to think. The engagement was finalized by the time Holiday Break started. Kat-Kat and Abby are to be wed a month after Graduation!" he mock-giggled.

"You mean to tell me, that his parents arranged his wedding?" Nadya had a look of disbelief in her eyes.

"Nadya, it is a common pureblood practice. Don't tell me that your parents never planned anything for you?" Alphard asked perplexedly.

---

Hermione was caught off guard. How was she supposed to respond to that. She didn't know that arranged marriages were a common thing in the Pureblood world. She thought quickly.

"My parents...my parents...they did arrange something, but they allowed me ample time to fall in love with him, as I did. But he died along with them." It was all partially true. Unlike the others who expected Ron to be her soul mate, her parents expected for a long time that she would fall for Harry. Her mother called it parental instinct. 'Parental instinct indeed' she thought sardonically to herself as the thought about the dark humor in it.

"Are you ok?" Her reverie was broken when a worried face came into vision. It was Tom. The man who cared for her. The man who was there. The man who was still alive. It was her Tom.

"Yes. I am fine. I just got a sudden headache. I think I will go out to the garden for a breath of air. Yes. That is what I will do." she assured him to alleviate the anxiety that she saw in him.

"Very well then, I'll accompany you." he prepared to stand up.

"No Tom. It is fine." she sat him back down and smiled. "You stay here with Alphard. Talk. I won't be long. I just need to get out for a while. I'll come back in a minute. I promise." she smiled softly.

"Alright." he said slowly. "Well, at least use this." he took off his cloak and gave it to her. "We don't want a repeat of last time now do we?" he smiled softly. That smile could melt Hermione in an instant.

"Thank you Tom." she smiled and left.

Hermione needed to get out of that library.

In her memories, she just realized something. In that instant, the seed of doubt had been cast. Was Tom just a substitute for Harry? Was that what he was?

The thought of it made her head swirl. She felt all dizzy all of a sudden. She felt so light-headed. She just kept repeating in her mind that it wasn't possible. It wasn't. She loved Harry, but not enough to go find a replacement for him. She could...no...wouldn't do that...not to Tom...not to herself. It just wasn't possible.

A sharp pain stabbed on her head. It was like a cold knife being forced into her skull. It was so painful that she fell down on the ground and screamed in agony, but nobody heard. No one came. She was all alone.

'Escape.'

She walked faster. She needed some air. She needed to feel the fresh breeze. She needed to escape her thoughts. She needed to escape.

'Escape.' her mind fought desperately.

She ran.

She ran so fast, but somehow, she couldn't escape her thoughts. She couldn't escape the doubt. She couldn't escape the fear. She ran faster. She recognized the hall that she passed through. The dark and cold passages were as familiar to her as her own hands. She would never forget those halls. She dreamed of these halls every night. She knew the fork at the end of it all. She knew the heavy oak doors that she would be faced with. She knew the room that she would soon enter. And she knew the fear that was running through her body at that very moment.

A cold shiver rushed up her spine. She was so afraid to come to the end of the hallway, but it was as if she couldn't do anything but go though with it. She was like a puppet in a show, in the merciless hands of a higher being. She walked the same steps and stumbled on the same spots. Everything was according to her nightmares. It was worse, actually. This was real.

'No. That was just a dream. That can't happen. This isn't happening.'

She was living her nightmares and she was powerless to leave its fate.

'Escape!'

---

"Was it something I said?" Alphard looked at Nadya's retreating figure.

"No Black. She has been like that for the past few days. I have no idea why. She just tells me that she is tired or dizzy, but I know there is something more than that. She just won't tell me." Tom said more to himself than to Alphard.

"Tom, maybe she is just really dizzy."

"No. I know there is something more. You know it too. Admit it. She is hiding something."

"Fine. I know that she is lying. But Tom, remember, she is a very good liar. I almost didn't catch it. She must be trying really hard to hide it from you."

"But I have to know Black."

"Damn your curiosity Tom. Just have the patience to wait until she tells you."

"Did you find him?" Tom abruptly changed the topic. He didn't want to continue the discussion.

"But...Yes." Alphard sighed. "Yes. I found him right where you directed me. In the house near the graveyard."

"Good. His condition?"

"Healthy. Married. Two children, a boy and a girl, near your age."

"So I have siblings now." Tom had a menacingly evil look on his face. "Mudbloods."

"Tom. Are you sure you want to go through this? He has a family now. He has a wife. He has children, your brother and sister."

"Are you having second thoughts Black?"

"Of course not. I am just making sure that you don't. Again. Are you sure that you want to go though with this? There will no turning back after this."

"I am positive. I want to feel his blood in my hands. If I have to kill a few mudbloods in the process, then so be it."

"Alright then." Alphard nodded. "By the way, does Nadya know anything about this?"

"No. She doesn't need to know about it as of now."

Alphard shook his head in utter disappointment. This was not happening. "You can't lie to her forever Tom."

"I am not lying to her. I am just not telling her a few details."

"Tell her." He pressed.

"Soon."

"When?" Nadya needed to know...especially now that she and Tom were...well a 'she and Tom.'

"Soon."

"Soon isn't good enough Tom. She needs to know before this gets any further."

"No she doesn't! But fine I'll tell her before the plan is expected. Happy?" he drawled sardonically. He wasn't pleased with Alphard's behavior, but he was his most trusted ally.

"Just be sure that when you tell her that you will be ready for any reaction she will have."

"She will understand. We are the same, her and I."

"That may not be the case Tom. Be ready for that. She doesn't look like a person who would take dishonesty very lightly." he argued, but then sighed. "Listen. I have known you for a long time Tom. I think you are scared. I think you are scared of losing her."

"There is nothing to be afraid of. I know she will support this."

"Then why haven't you told her?"

"I have had enough of this inquisition." he stood up from where he was seated. "Good day Black and welcome back."

Alphard simply nodded as he watched Tom leave the library.

Tom walked in the corridors when he suddenly had a feeling that something was wrong. Something was not right. He could sense it as if something in him had been triggered. By pure impulse, he ran to a certain hallway. It was part of the dungeons, cold and barely lit. It was so dark that he had no idea where he was passing through, but something in him knew where he was going. He was being drawn to an entity, like a moth to a flame. He couldn't help but follow his instincts. It was leading him somewhere absolutely unknown. He walked farther and farther until he was faced with two doors. With out thinking, he picked the left hand door. At first, he was blinded by the sudden burst of light. His eyes had gotten used to the darkness of the corridors that he needed a little bit of time to adjust. Slowly, he got back his sight and what he saw drew all the blood from his face. He was as white as a sheet at what he saw. There and then, he got the scare of his life.

Nadya was lying on the floor, unconscious.

**A/N: Now what did I tell you. Now isnt that lovely cliffie just lovely! I am so evil right now. I oh and didn't i tell you that the dreams would be important! Now, if you don't get it, i suggest you read the previous chappies so you may have a clue of what is going on. I left little clues in the previous dreams and it will lead you to what I am planning at this very moment! I am so evil!**

**That will all teach you to value things when I tell you to remember them! LOL!**

**Thanks to all my reviewers in the previous chapter! You guys give me heart palpitations of joy! Oh and I would also love to thank the cute monica (aka. LOTF, the sillylittlepanda) for being a teriff beta!**

**I would also like to thank my darling sharrie! i love you with all my heart! RPing with you keeps my crearive juices flowing like crazy and besides i love the way that your fics just make me plain inspired. My method of getting out of writer's block is reading fics and I always find myself coming back to your amazing oneshots! Also a big shout out so sammie sue (aka. anuksunamun-kalia) for being such an amazing girl...i must tell you that you have influenced me in such a big way...i can't help but compare this to riddle's phantom all the time because it has set such a high standard for excellence that i am simply trying to reach (note that i said trying meaning i haven't succeeded...LOL) **

**FInally, I must plug my darling RP. Please join it since we need new members. It is a marauder RPG that is all fun and giggles. James has finally announced that he will never persue Lily Evans ever again! Wanna know what happens, go to my RPG! the link is in my profile! Please join! If you love me at all, please join!**

**  
Oh and as a closing, if you all have any comments what so ever about this fic, go click on that little button that says GO! because it will lead you to a little window where you can type your thoughts and send them to me! Isnt that fun? Now go press it!**

**PS: JOIN MY RPG! LINK IS ON MY PROFILE! REVIEW! BE HAPPY!**

**rita  
**


	18. What Dreams May Come

**A/N: Guess who is back?! If you said Rita then you get a cookie! I am back! After my pangs of self pity, my mother gave me a stern talking to. I saw her point. Writers don't write for themselves. They write for the readers. If you just write for yourself, then you are not a writer. From this point on, I am writing for you guys. Thank you all who reviewed my response to the flame, and I hope you are still with me on this boat.**

**PS: it may take a while in between chapters since I am a little rusty. But, expect an update on I Hate My Life and Casting Shadows as well. BTW, I think Casting Shadows, Desperation and I Hate My Life will be my masterpieces. I have written chapters in advance worth of dialogue, and from the script format, you will be surprised at all of their endings.**

**Chapter 17: What Dreams May Come**

Light shined through her closed eyes, and for a moment, she had even forgotten where she was or how she got there. Everything seemed so familiar right to her. The smells of the place, it was as if she was ---

"Hermione…" It had been so long since she had heard that name, been called by that name. It almost seemed foreign to her, but at the same time, so familiar. She was confused. Why? How? Was she home?

Her eyes fluttered open. Slowly, she let the light adjust in her eyes. It was so bright, brighter than any place she had ever been to. Where was she? Why did it feel like she was home?

"Where am I?"

Suddenly, she caught sight of something, or rather someone. She thought she would never see him again…

"You're home."

---

The cold air stung his very being. It was as if it was draining him slowly and slowly. He was frozen. His mind was screaming to him.

"Nadya."

It was barely a whisper and less of a gasp. It seemed like a ghostly utterance. Her name had escaped from his dry lips before he even knew it. There was Nadya, his Nadya, lying on the cold floor. He felt almost as scared as he did when he saw her in the snow. No. This was worse. It held every bit of his own strength, his own sense of self-constraint, not to scream his lungs off.

'Move!'

'Shout!'

'Get help!'

'Go to her!'

There were so many voices swimming around in his consciousness, all his voices. All saying one thing.

' Do something! ANYTHING!'

But his body wouldn't move. It had been driven to a state of numbness, nothingness. Tom couldn't move a muscle. All he could do was stand there at the threshold of a dark and foreboding room, just looking at her. She was lying on the cold stone floors. No breath was escaping her. No sense of life was in her limbs. She was just limp there, lying, still and silent. He couldn't wrap it around his brain. Disbelief was still overpowering him at this moment. It looked as if she was---

'NO!'

His mind interrupted him before he could finish that thought. She was not dead! She couldn't be dead! He would reassure himself of that once he picked up the strength to defy himself and move.

'DAMN IT! MOVE!'

He didn't know what had him so frozen. It was no spell nor curse. There were no clandestine restraints holding him back. It was all in his mind.

'So this is what fear is like'

---

"Home?" She asked. No. She couldn't be home. She just couldn't! How? Why? So many questions kept rambling on in her mind. She didn't understand any of it. Nothing. "I can't be home."

He stepped from the light, and instantly, she knew who he was. Perhaps she knew even before she opened her eyes. His voice. She would never forget his voice. But this couldn't be. Harry was dead. She had seen him die. A knife was thrust through his heart and he died. How could be standing right in front of her right then and there without so much as a scratch or wound. Was she---

"Dead? No Hermione. You are as alive as I am."

"How?" She couldn't stop asking that same thing. How was this all possible? How was he alive? How was she back home? Hermione couldn't help but question everything that was around her. Everything told her this was not possible, but yet there she was. There he was.

Hermione stretched out her hand, hesitantly, gradually. Her fingers were trembling with a mix of fear and excitement. She took a step closer. Her hand grazed on his cheek. It was warm.

"You're alive."

"And so are you."

She had no knowledge of it, but tears were coming out of her eyes. Streaming down her face. She didn't notice them as they fell. All she felt was her hand on his cheek. His hand grazing hers, as if wiping something away. Her eyes unconsciously closed. He had such warm hands. She could feel his callous fingers just wiping away the unknown substance. It had been so long since she felt that.

"I am home."

---

Everything inside him was panicking. He didn't know what to do. He was still frozen to the spot, ridden by fear. He shouldn't have left her alone. He shouldn't have let her go out on her own. He was her responsibility. He should have taken care of her. He should have known better than to leave her alone!

He needed to go to her, or else something else would freeze him. It would freeze not only his body, but his mind as well. He refused to let his fear turn to grief. Finally, the panic melted away the ice of fear. His emotions had heated him up, blazed a fire within him.

Tom took small, calculated strides towards her. With every step, he saw her with more clarity. Just like the day in the snow, she seemed fast asleep, peaceful, happy. But he could also see that she was pale, very pale. He reached for her outstretched hand and held it. Cold, but not to the extent of death. There was still time.

He gently picked her small frame. She was incredibly light, or maybe it just seemed that way to him. His determination and panic fueled him with the energy to take her to the only one who he knew could help.

'Dumbledore.'

---

"I missed you." He said, whispering in her ear. It had been so long since she had seen him. It felt like forever had passed by in just one blink of an eye. His forehead rested on hers and she was looking deeply and innately to his emerald green eyes. But doubts were still in her mind. Before he could finally kiss her, she took a step back. She needed to understand.

"I still don't understand any of this. How can this be?" She asked him. Hermione was still in a daze. She was standing right in front of him. He was not dead and lifeless, but alive, vibrant as ever. She couldn't help but smile despite her confusion on the whole situation. Did it even matter how she got there? Wasn't the fact that he was right there, in front of her, all that mattered? Hermione couldn't help but feel as if she was mad for thinking that there should be more. This was all she had ever wanted. To have him back. To have him with her. She cursed the doubts that plagued her heart. It shouldn't be this complicated.

"Why don't we go see the others?" He gave her a bright smile.

The others?

"Mates. She is back home!" He called out to the light from whence he came. Slowly enough, she saw them emerging. First Ron came out, throwing himself at her and giving her a hug, the hugs that he used to give her. She looked hard at him. Nothing had changed within him as well. He was still the same old Ron she used to have rows with. Only now, he seemed calmer, more at peace with everything. Happier.

"I knew you'd come home."

Another person came out of the light, no two. Draco and Ginny. She couldn't believe this. They looked so happy. Their hands were intertwined, happy and carefree. Ginny was blooming with all her fiery being as Draco's calm and cool exterior balanced her in every way. He let go of her for a second and she, much like her brother, ran towards her in utter jubilation. Draco came slowly behind, flashing his famous smirk at her.

"Took you long enough Granger. Weaslette has been absolutely ghastly annoying without you." There has a hidden humor and happiness in the way he said that, as if he too had been waiting for her. Before she knew it, she gave him a huge hug as well. She had missed him too. He didn't need to say it for her to know. Draco laughed at her sudden action, but hugged back with the intensity that her other two friends had.

"She's home?" a voice came from the light. How could she forget him?

"Come on Neville!" Ron shouted from beside Hermione. Instantly, Neville stepped out of the light, a smile gracing his normally shy ridden face. He looked so happy to see her. He did not run as the others had, probably scared of tripping on his laces, but you could see the excitement in his face easily matched up to the others. Hermione hugged him as well. He was slightly blushing, but then again he wouldn't be Neville if he didn't.

"We're all here Hermione." Said Harry, the smile still gracing his face.

"We've been waiting for you. Now come on, mum preparing lunch by the garden. You know how she hates it when we're late." Laughed Ron.

Hermione's tears faded. All the laughter and happiness around her was contagious. Harry gently slipped his hand in hers and interlaced their fingers. He put his other arm around her waist. Hermione hadn't felt this safe in a long time.

---

Tom's pace was quickening. His heart was racing at an inconceivable speed. He felt a weight in his chest, telling him that this was not like the incident in the snow. He had a feeling that this was far worse than anything she had experienced to date.

His strides grew longer and longer. His mind was working in twice the speed as well, trying to recall where Professor Dumbledore's offices were. The panic in his mind had blocked out which portrait it was behind. He looked at it all, painting after painting, trying to remember just where it was.

'FASTER! LOOK FOR IT FASTER!'

'THERE ISN'T ENOUGH TIME! FIND IT!'

'CAN'T YOU SEE SHE IS----'

No! He wouldn't let his mind finish that thought! She was not dying. She was not dying. The fire within him had once again melted the fear away.

"The woman knitting socks." He gasped. Faster and faster. He scanned the portraits faster. The woman knitting socks. The woman knitting socks! Where the bloody hell was the portrait of The woman knitting socks! He couldn't silence his screaming mind, for he was screaming with them. He needed to find Dumbledore now!

Then, in the corner past the statue of Berndan the Bogtrotter, he found the portrait he had been looking for. With one free hand he pounded on the portrait, rattling the woman.

"What is the matter with you young man! Say the password and I will allow you entrance!" She screeched at him.

"There is no time for that! Bring him out now!" His voice was terrifying, even for a portrait. It was murderous, fear-ridden and desperate all at the same time. Instantly, the woman fled her painting. He could only assume that she did as he had ordered her too. If not, then there would be one less painting to look at in Hogwarts.

The door was creaking open. Good. The old man with Half-moon spectacles emerged at the threshold. His at first calm face changed in drastic speed as he saw the precious load that the young man had been carrying.

"What happened?" he asked, leading him inside, instructing Tom to place Nadya on the coach by the fire.

"I don't know." He managed to speak out, mustering all the composure that he could. "I don't know what happened. I found her like this."

He saw that the old man was tending to his niece. Dumbledore had gently cleared her face of the mass of hair that was covering it and was looking at her peaceful face. Instead of relief, he saw the distinct look of worry in his features.

"What's wrong?" He asked instantly. Dumbledore's reaction was not reassuring in the least. Tom could feel his muscles tensing up in worry. This could not be possible. What was happening? "What is wrong with her?"

"Dreams are a dangerous thing Mr. Riddle. They are more dangerous than what people give them credit for."

**A/N: In celebration of my return, I give you all a cliffhanger!  
**

**Dun dun dun. In light of my new epiphany, I want to connect better with my readers again. Ask me questions, whether it be personal or about my work. It well help me understand you guys better, and so you guys can understand my stories better as well. Thank you for your loyalty.**

**-Rita**


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